Strollerderby : idol

Morning News - iPhone Gets Feature Other Phones Already Have

Brett Singer — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 13:00:00 GMT

Updating yesterday's Natasha Richardson story: an autopsy reveals that she died of bleeding in the brain and "she might have survived had she received immediate treatment." The thing is, people with this sort of injury typically feel fine at first. So sad.

NBC is launching a show to compete with "American Idol." Simon Cowell probably thinks this is a "horrible" idea. ("Horrible" is one of the words he uses a lot, right?) On "Idol", Alexis Grace went home. She was shocked. Shocked. Why are they always so surprised? I guess you have think you're a major talent to get on TV and sing like that but just once it'd be fun to hear someone say, "Yeah, I suck. It was only a matter of time before I got the boot."

Why is Steve Wozniak on "Dancing With The Stars"? Based on this quote from his website, I guess the reason is because people said he wouldn't be able to do it. I wonder if Apple fans will keep voting for him the way football fans did with Jerry Rice. Woz has definitely been keeping in touch with his audience, accusing "Dancing" producers of rigging the voting in order to goose the ratings, then apologizing, all via his Facebook page. If this keeps up, I might actually have to watch the show.

Speaking of Apple, the new iPhone software will include bleeding edge features like the copying and pasting of text. What's that, your phone has been able to do that for years? Mine too. The iPhone is nifty but certain omitted features prove that Steve Jobs could probably sell water to a drowning Apple fan if it had that logo on it. (Personally, until the iPhone has an actual keyboard, I won't even consider buying one.)

Financial news update: stocks tanked and it wasn't CNBC's fault. Are you happy, Jeff Zucker?

Austrian monster dad Josef Fritzl was sentenced to life in a psych hospital. Life in prison would be better, but even though he could be paroled in 15 years, it's not likely to happen. The speed of the trial was kind of impressive; in the U.S., these things seem to take a lot longer. I'm sure there's a reason for that but I don't know what it is.

And finally, there were a heck of a lot of babies born in 2007. Madeline points out that it wasn't Octomom's fault -- "she only gave birth to one baby that year."

That's all for now. Have a great weekend and we'll see you on Monday.

Image: Woz.org

New Baby Boom

Morning News - March Madness or March Sadness?

Morning News - Cheney, Duct Tape, Outer Space

Jimmy Kimmel And The Octomom

Best of FameCrawler: Week of March 13th

Whit Honea — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 20:00:00 GMT

Katie Holmes is Beautiful Again

Is Kelly Clarkson Pregnant? (PHOTOS and VIDEO)

Jade Goody's Funeral: Public?

Paramedics Called to New Octomom House

Michael J. Fox is Positive

Angelina Caught Brad With The Nanny!

Gospel Singer BeBe Winans Arrested For Assault

Britney Spears Has A Not So Secret Romance

Clay Aiken ain't no fruit

Brett Singer — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 20:00:00 GMT

Far be it from me to imply that Clay Aiken is anything less than muy macho. But, you know, there have been those nasty rumors, which led to threats of a lawsuit from his devoted fan base, who are known as the Claymates. (Really. They call themselves Claymates, and one of them tried to sue Clay over rumors that he was homosexual. Don't you feel normal now?) So perhaps -- and I'm not saying there's anything wrong with this, you know -- Clay's recent actions are fueled by a desire to "butch it up, Mary" as the saying goes.

First: he impregnates a woman. This is a clear sign of masculinity. I mean, try doing that if you're... you know, not manly. Well, it was artificial insemination, which means there was no actual physical contact. But hey, there's nothing wrong with that either. (Even if Aiken isn't the father, he could have been. Hey! Stop laughing!)

Second: when a ~~vulture~~ cameraperson from ~~the fiery pits of Hell~~ TMZ confronted him on the street, he pulled a Sean Penn and whacked the camera. In a very aggressive, manly way. Again, nothing wrong with that. (Video of the incident is below, or click here.)

One thing that I've always found interesting is what constitutes "manliness." Impregnating a woman means that your sperm is, you know, spermy. Strong swimmers, etc. But so what?

And punching someone, even if that someone is ~~being a dick~~ just doing their jobs, is more out of control than it is "macho." To be fair, Clay just kinda pushed the guy; more specifically, he pushed the camera. If he had ripped the dude's arms off and beaten him within an inch of his life, that would have been much more manly. (Not that we advocate such behavior. But it would definitely have been big news.)

So maybe it's possible that all of this "news" just happens to be coming out (no pun intended) around the time that Mr. Aiken has a new album out. Just a thought.

In closing, let me request that the phrase "Claby" (Clay + Baby) never, ever catch on. It's just... there is something wrong with that.

(TMZ.com screenshot)

other image: offoffBway.com

Breaking News: Clay may not be the father

All Aiken, All the Time

American Idol or American Psycho? Clay Aiken Gives Pap a SMACKDOWN!

Fans Show Support For Clay Aiken

Clay Aiken Involved in Pregnancy

Breaking News: Clay Aiken might not be the father

Brett Singer — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 13:30:00 GMT

Could the whole "Clay Aiken can impregnate a woman without even touching her" news be a big fat stinkin' lie? The Calgary Herald is reporting that "several people close to" babymama Jaymes Foster are denying claims (clayms? Nope, not going there) that Aiken is the daddy.

~~One Of The Signs Of The Apocalypse~~ TMZ first reported that Aiken had artificially inseminated Foster, the sister of record producer David Foster, going on to say that, "Clay is a lot more than sperm -- we're told he will have an active role in raising the child." The story was picked up by roughly 12 million media outlets. BUT one of the so-called sources is denying that he ever said Clay was the daddy-to-be, even asking People.com to retract their story. And B.J. Cook, David Foster's ex-wife and Jaymes Foster's ex-sister-in-law said, "Jaymes is definitely pregnant, that much is true...I can guarantee that it's not Clay Aiken's baby." (emphasis added.)

Of course, no one directly involved is talking to the press, including Clay, who is very busy punching cameras.

It must be pointed out that we have no knowledge of this incident, or alleged incident. Maybe Clay is on his way to fatherhood. Maybe not. Who the hell knows? Clearly this is the most important story of the decade. Well, other than the Sex and the City movie. (Election? What election?)

Aside #1: Foster went from "in her late 40's" to "50" in a matter of days -- I guess it is stressful being in the public eye. Here's a photo of the happy non-couple.

Aside #2: Even if this whole thing turns out to be bull, at least we'll always have the phrase "Clay is a lot more than sperm." Thank you ~~Satan~~ TMZ.

images: thehollywoodgossip.com, offoffBway.com

All Aiken, All the Time

Best of FameCrawler: Week of May 23rd

Whit Honea — Fri, 23 May 2008 20:00:00 GMT

Christina Aguilera: These Boobs Aren't Made For Buying

Red Hot Chili Peppers Split!

Ben Stiller,Jack Black & Robert Downey Jr Steal The Show - Video

Whoopi Calls Out Denise Richards

Daughter of Steven Curtis Chapman Hit, Killed By Car

Shiloh's Shopping Spree!

Bo Bice Gives His Baby A Normal Name

Usher & Wife Tameka Have Split!

Julia Roberts Eats Baby

Strollerderby : idol

Morning News - iPhone Gets Feature Other Phones Already Have

Morning News - Natasha Richardson Dies (UPDATE - Autopsy Information)

New Baby Boom

Morning News - March Madness or March Sadness?

Morning News - Cheney, Duct Tape, Outer Space

Jimmy Kimmel And The Octomom

Best of FameCrawler: Week of March 13th

Clay Aiken ain't no fruit

Breaking News: Clay may not be the father

American Idol or American Psycho? Clay Aiken Gives Pap a SMACKDOWN!

Fans Show Support For Clay Aiken

Clay Aiken Involved in Pregnancy

Breaking News: Clay Aiken might not be the father

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