Woman changes her name to Cutout Dissection.com

Brett Singer — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 19:00:00 GMT

There are all sorts of stories of parents who name their kids dopey things – Sarah McCain Palin, Miley Ray Cyrus Hannah Montana Lipschutz, etc. – but here is someone who changed her own name to something weird.

The former Jennifer Thornburg -- whose driver's license now reads Dissection.com, Cutout -- wanted to do something to protest animal dissections in schools.

Thornburg – sorry, Dissection.com – is an intern at PETA, or People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. The name is a web site belonging to the animal rights group.

Over at PETA's site, Jennifer – sorry, Cutout – has an amusing anecdote about getting a driver's license with her new name:

What did the DMV say when you got your new license?

It took me two tries to get my license. On the second try, the DMV worker looked very amused and confused, but also looked like she was afraid to ask for an explanation.

And what do the regular people think of her new name? "I normally do have to repeat my name several times when I am introducing myself to someone new…Once they find out what my name is, they want to know more about what the Web site is about." Yes, I'm sure it’s a real conversation starter. Her dad, Duane Thornburg, thinks its fine. No mention of the mom or other relatives.

I know I’m taking a not-that-nice tone here, and I apologize for that. I suppose it’s a fair way to raise awareness for a cause that you believe in, in this case, students dissecting animals. One thing occurs to me, though. It's never somebody who has to work for a living that pulls stunts like this. Although the CNN story says that Cutout "is working in Virginia", she's actually an intern. Which means she's not working, at least not for money. So there's a part of me that wonders if this is just a weird way for her to get attention. (Nerdy aside: technically, the name doesn't really work, since URLs don't have spaces in them. So the name should be cutoutdissection.com, not Cutout Dissection.com. Just one name. Like Prince. Or Sting. Or Cher.)

To be fair, Ms. Dissection.com has been against dissection since her name was still Jennifer; a few years ago she convinced her school to stop dissecting dead animals in science classes, according to PETA. (Now they only dissect them during Algebra! No they don't, that's a bad joke, I'm sorry.) So she has the courage of her convictions. But maybe there are better ways to do good in the world? Maybe it's hard for me to take this too seriously when the world economy is collapsing and the United States is in the midst of an increasingly ugly Presidential campaign. I'm not saying distractions are a bad thing (LOOK! PICTURES OF CUTE THINGS!), but Cutout is kidding herself a little bit if she thinks changing her name is going to make a tremendous difference. Unless I’m wrong, of course. What do you think?

Source: CNN, Source/image: PETA

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Brett Singer — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 15:00:00 GMT

You won't have Portia De Rossi to kick around anymore – well, you will (although why you would want to kick her, I have no idea), but she'll have a new name. According to the Daily News, Portia will take DeGeneres' last name when they officially tie the knot. (I guess that clears up any question about who the "man" in that relationship is, right?)

I do wonder how a gay couple makes this decision. Ellen definitely makes more money, and she is older. She also never wears dresses. OK, maybe in their case it wasn't that difficult. I'll be curious if other gay couples make name-changes as they (hopefully) continue to get legally hitched. (If this issue has come up for any readers, let us know in the comments.)

Interestingly, many women in heterosexual marriages don't change their names, at least judging from the reactions to Adrienne's recent post on the subject. Of course, some women did make the switch, for various reasons: "I didn't have any special attachment to my original name", "I didn't want to change my name, but my husband really wanted me to" are two of the comments.

The subject of names didn't come up when I got married, but it's clearly an issue. I know I wouldn't want to change my name, and I'm not sure how I would have felt about it if my wife had wanted to "keep her name" (a phrase I think sounds odd, although I admit that I don't have a better one – yet). I'm not a fan of the hyphen-name, mostly because usually it's only the mother who uses it; the husband and children use the man's name. If everyone in the family went hyphen, I think that would be different. One consideration that rarely gets discussed is what a woman has to do in order to change her name; if my wife's experience is any guide, it can be a lot of work.

So guys, if your wife-to-be doesn't want to "take your name" when she takes your hand in marriage, try this:

"Grrr! Ugg want you change name! Make Ugg feel manly! Now get Ugg dinner!"

Yeah, that'll work.

image: Daily News

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