Strollerderby : orgasmic birth

Should You Take A Risk on Orgasmic Birth? (Orgasmic Birth Video included)

Cole Gamble — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 18:00:00 GMT

The other night I caught a 20/20 (yes people still watch 20/20) on Orgasmic birth. Having read Babble, you’re probably aware of orgasmic birth. If not, here it is: orgasmic birth is pretty much what it sounds like, having orgasms during the birth process. You know, instead of pain. Just you and your partner, making out in a kiddy pool in your living room until you climax the kid right on out. Sounds fantastic, sign me up. Makes sense, the female parts the baby passes through are the same that got stimulated to make the baby in the first place. One problem though: how do you turn a process that causes the worst pain ever for 99.999999999999999% of the female population into the most sensual and pleasant?

Fairy Dust and Unicorn Wishes?

Well no, but the expert on the segment said the key to having an orgasmic birth is to completely reimagine your concept of pain. You see, apparently if we expect pain, as is the case with women when they think about birth, then pain is what you’ll get. However, if you tell yourself it won’t be painful (and stay away from that scary, unsexy hospital) your excruciating pain will magically transform into that one crazy night you spent with that Australian dude in a hot tub gobbling Quaaludes.

Here’s the problem I foresee. You’re down with orgasmic birth. You want the whole package and look forward to getting your groove on come baby time. You do the Scientology thing and erase all negativity you associate with birthing. You fill the kiddy pool, light some candles, break out the John Tesh CD and get on your hands and knees waiting for the pleasure to begin.

And then something does begin. A horrible, mind-splittingly agony. It’s like the defensive core for the Pittsburg Steelers is chopping their way out of you with machetes. Now if this, in your experience, is how orgasms normally go, congratulations. Otherwise, you’re probably screaming “FUCK! Fuckity, fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck, motherfucker, super fuck, double dutch shit fucking fuck” (I’m paraphrasing). All your meditation and good intentions failed you and now you are stuck with a horrifyingly unorgasmic birth.

This is the risk you take when you try venturing down OB road. Maybe that’s not a problem. Maybe you planned natural birth anyhow. If not, you’re probably feeling pretty damn cheated and want to take the face of every one of those smirking woman in those orgasmic birth videos and smash them into a searing cast iron skillet for tricking you into believing that shoving a thanksgiving turkey out your fun hole could be sexy.

So, considering all this, does orgasmic birth still entice you? Are you willing to take the risk that you will not become “clear” enough to transform the pain?

Catch the pro OB facts at www.orgasmicbirth.com

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The Problem with "Orgasmic Birth"

Miriam Axel-Lute — Sat, 20 Dec 2008 16:14:00 GMT

The documentary Orgasmic Birth is coming to 20/20 in early January. I have mixed feelings about this.

First, unlike some of my fellow bloggers, I have no trouble believing orgasms can occur during the birth process, and this fact neither creeps me out nor makes me angry. I even think that it's cool that a documentary on the phenomenon is out and about.

However, it does creep me out that in the accompanying print article, people seem to be holding up orgasmic birth as somehow central to or representative of the messages of the natural birth movement, especially the very very important message that things like atmosphere, position, how safe a woman feels and how afraid she is will (along with a bunch of other stuff) affect her experience of labor pain, and the amount of it. They keep linking the idea of orgasmic birth being this big "best-kept secret" directly with such basic concepts as how it matters that women be allowed to labor in comfortable positions. I find this to be a troubling leap.

For my part, I think I had about as good a set-up as could be asked for. I was at home, I had a tub, I was never on my back, I felt safe and well cared for, I didn't go in particularly afraid. In fact, I knew of the existance of orgasmic birth, and while I didn't expect it, I was fully open to the idea that I might experience contractions as "rushes" instead of "pains."

I didn't. It hurt. A lot. I know this is no big surprise to most of you. It was not intolerable, and it was, as some call it, "pain with a purpose." It was worth it. But it sure was pain, and I sure didn't feel sexy or like an earth goddess or any of that.

Luckily, I hadn't been expecting to, and so I look back on my birth experience as a positive, empowering one.

But I'm afraid that if this orgasmic birth stuff is presented in the wrong light it's going generate a lot of "damn hippie" sentiment about natural birth, or even worse, a bunch of angry women who feel they were misled into thinking if they just breathed right and weren't afraid, it definitely wouldn't hurt.

The film's website says "Filmmaker Debra Pascali-Bonaro reveals a revolutionary approach to birth that is statistically safer for both mother and child than the birthing and delivery methods that are standard in many parts of the world today." Maybe she does. I think most of what the folks involved in the film would advocate would in fact do that. But surely orgasmic births are a happy side effect of that, not the revolutionary approach itself?

My take is that orgasmic birth is like simultaneous orgasms when two virgins have sex. Possible? Sure. Cool? Hell ya. Likely? Hardly. But more importantly, focusing on it as the goal makes a lot of people feel like a failure. You can just as easily up the odds by doing a lot of things you should be doing anyway: making sure people are well educated about sex and anatomy, happy with their bodies, not pressured into sex, etc.

Photo by Irannis.

Should You Take a Risk on Orgasmic Birth? (With Video)

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Pain in Childbirth May Be, Well, Pointless Now?

Kelly Mills — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 21:33:00 GMT

Hmmm, this is real interesting. Some natural childbirth advocates suggest that the pain in childbirth adds something valuable to the birth process, helping mothers bond with their babies and even bringing um, sexual pleasure (in some cases, but not mine, oh lordy no!) However, a study discussed here in Salon (via Jezebel) suggests that theory may be backwards. Instead, labor and delivery pain might have served to signal to the mother that she should seek assistance, and in fact drive her to desire "companionship and security" from others. From an evolutionary standpoint, this could have meant people who sought help and protection during times like childbirth and illness were more likely to survive. (Hey, if the degree of labor pain indicated individual evolutionary fitness, I would have totally had it made! Um, it doesn't, by the way.)

So, if pain has simply functioned to drive delivering mothers to seek companionship (personals ad, anyone?) then perhaps it's a perk we don't really need any more. And it could be that people are suffering without it serving any real need. Cough.

Okay, I'm sorry, but I like this take on things, curmudgeon that I am. I do think in some circles there's a strange sort of romanticism attached to labor pain, and even the idea of "natural" childbirth as being somehow noble or righteous. Buuut, that said, there are risks attached to the interventions designed to alleviate the pain of labor, and women should be informed of those as well before making any decision. I think the problem is that childbirth is so fraught with anxiety for so many of us---not only because it hurts, but because lots of us want to make the "right" choice for our babies and ourselves. Turns out "right" for me was an blessed, welcome epidural administered after I tried to go natural for a long time, but I would not think of telling you it ought to be the right way for you.

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Brett Singer — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 14:00:00 GMT

Some things go great together. Chocolate and peanut butter. Milk and cookies. Childbirth and orgasms.

What, you disagree? You think that it's unbelievably weird to be thinking about sex while your child is being born? What are you, a stiff?

There's a scene in Edward Albee's play "The Goat or Who is Sylvia?" (which is about a man who -- SPOILER ALERT -- cheats on his wife with a goat) when the father (who is having an affair with a goat) is comforting his son and talking about becoming sexually aroused at a certain inappropriate time (when a baby is bouncing on your lap). His friend enters and overhears the conversation, saying, "Is there anything that doesn't turn you people on?"

That's what I thought of when I saw this video. What possible good can come from reaching orgasm while you give birth? Why does it have to be either insanely painful or insanely pleasurable? Why not something in between?

If somebody wants to give birth outside of a hospital, that's their business. (Unless they want to do it RIGHT outside a hospital, on the street. That seems like a bad idea.) Madeline Holler just wrote a terrific essay on home births. But why does it need to be a sexual experience? And before you say, "Don't knock it 'til you've tried it," let me be the first to tell you that trying it isn't an issue, because it'll never happen.

Here's the video. You tell me what the creepy factor is. For me, on a scale of one to ten, this is an eleven. But maybe I'm just uptight.

Strollerderby : orgasmic birth

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The Problem with "Orgasmic Birth"

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