Strollerderby : plane

First Class or No Class? Who Gets the Upgrade on Your Trip?

Mike Adamick (Cry It Out!) — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 12:02:00 GMT

Whenever the idea of a family trip comes up, I immediately imagine myself in first class, being pampered and doted on. There are international carriers now with entire suites in first class -- not just chairs that fold into beds and have really snazzy TVs. But actual suites -- as in close the door and enjoy the quiet bliss of being fabulously wealthy.

In these imaginings, my wife and 2-year-old daughter are somewhere in the nether-regions of coach -- or "back there somewhere," as I imagine telling a friendly steward while using the appropriate hand motions that convey both direction and disinterest. And so you can probably see why I'm always a little annoyed when my wife awakens me from the daydream and I settle back into the reality of traveling somewhere very far away, on a very long flight, while the three of us battle for elbow room and sanity somewhere back there in the nether-regions of middle class.

But what if, I always wonder. What if we get to the gate and the flight attendant says there's just one seat available in first class? Who would get it? Me? My wife? Surely not our daughter -- she's not old enough to truly enjoy the wonder of the cheese course. Eventually reality sets in and I come to understand that my wife would be working on her second glass of complimentary champagne at the precise moment I finally manage to strap in our daughter.

So it thrilled me to read this story from writer Beth Spotswood, who recently spotted a mother wrangling her luggage and children on the way through security. All alone, the woman managed to board with a million bags and just as many children. Later, on the flight, it was discovered that the woman wasn't traveling alone. Her husband was with her. In first class.

Sure, not helping out before settling himself into first class was truly the move of a top-notch ass -- and is also grounds for immediate divorce -- but still, clearly he was living the dream.

I can't be the only one who day dreams about a family trip filled with endless movies instead of moping, caviar instead of carrying-on. If you there was only one seat available in first class, who would get it in your family? Or would you do something really silly like pass it up out of solidarity?

Best of FameCrawler: Week of September 26th

Whit Honea — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 20:00:00 GMT

Lindsay Lohan Trumps Clay Aiken's 'Oh, Hey, I'm A Gay Dad' Reveal. Sort Of. Maybe.

Criss Angel Car Crash Video

Was Oprah Found Dead?

Travis Barker and DJ AM's Plane Crash Explained?

Suri Cruise is Isolated and Lonely

Travis Barker Plane Crash: Statement Issued

Pamela Anderson's New Playboy Spread (Photos)

Sharon Stone Loses Custody of Child

Britney's Womanizer Leaked

Is Criss Angel Dead?

Sarah Palin Disney Movie: Head of Skate

From The There Is A God Files: Patrick Dempsey Likes A Good Spanking

Your Kids Don’t Want to Vacation With You

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 19:00:00 GMT

Oh man, I thought when I saw the title to this article—“My Interminable Flight with a Crying Child”—yet another uptight non-parent complaining about the indignities of being subjected to strangers’ children in public places. But it turns out that Chuck Cohen has some decent points—and he’s a parent himself.

I still maintain that I have little sympathy for Cohen’s complete intolerance for crying children on his plane (“Why should kids under the age of 2 fly free on airplanes? And if they do, shouldn’t we institute a decibel charge?”), since I happen to be of the school that believes going out in public means encountering small humans—and sometimes, they’re going to cry.

But Cohen may be on to something when he argues that toddlers cry on airplanes (and in the theatre) for a reason: they don’t want to go to London, or sit still in a dark theatre for two hours. They’d much rather play on the swing set in the backyard.

Still, Cohen’s insistence that kids—and the vacationing public—will be happier if they are left at home may be logical, but it’s not necessarily practical. Are parents supposed to give up vacationing all together until their children develop a sophisticated interest in London theatre and Yosemite falls? And what about the plane flights that are to Grandma and Grandpa's house?

Photo: Mom's Buzz

When The Loud Neighbors Are Your Kids

Baby born in mid-air

Brett Singer — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 14:00:00 GMT

Next time I'm on a plane and there's a baby crying, I'll try to think that it could be worse. I could be sitting next to an actual birth.

That's what happened on a Korean Air Lines flight the other day. En route to the Philippines from New York City, Jacel Brown suddenly went into labor and gave birth to a baby boy, Jadan. The father delivered his own son, with an assist from a surgeon who happened to be on board (handy!). Before you say, "Why was she flying when she was so close to giving birth?" I need to point out that she wasn't all that close at all – it was her seventh month, so the little guy was premature. He weighed less than 3 pounds, and is currently at Lourdes Medical Center in New Jersey, where the couple is from.

That must've been some in-flight meal -- it caused her to give birth! (Ba-dum-bum.) Here's hoping baby, mother, father, and even the surgeon, are doing OK.

image: WCBS TV