Strollerderby : power

Jon Stewart on Dashing His Children’s Hopes

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 16:00:00 GMT

Jon Stewart was on Conan O’Brien the other night, discussing the uncanny power of fatherhood. “Being a father is great for me because it’s a chance to ruin someone from scratch,” Stewart said, eliciting cathartic laughter from parents everywhere.

When you disappoint an adult, he explains, you know that they’ll get over it; they’ve been slighted or let down before. But when you disappoint your kid, you get a look that says, “I will never forget this as long as I live.”

Thanks to Jezebel for posting this clip, which is currently not available anywhere else. In fact, I’m unable to post the video directly on this page, but you can watch it here. Stewart also describes the hilariously adorable “secret plans” his son devises when her younger sister is taking a nap.

Photo: Blah Blah Blahg

Parenting in the Real World: a Different Way of Looking at Things

Karen Murphy — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 19:28:00 GMT

I think most of us look for new ways of dealing with the things that come up in day-to-day parenting, the things that add up to the guidance we provide as parents to our kids, the things that will one day combine with genetics and their experiences with extended family, teachers, and other people of influence to create the adult who will eventually emerge from our children. We can read books or talk to other parents about their experiences to get these new ideas, these new perspectives.

I ran across something recently that, while not new, struck huge chords within me that I think will eventually have a huge impact on how I parent and indeed, how I interact with all sorts of other people.

The concept was partly from this article about Non-Violent Communication (also known as Compassionate Communication, which is, for me, a preferable title), and this is it:

Children are complete and whole people unto themselves. When we think of our children as a "child", it dehumanizes them and makes it our responsibility as parents to make them behave in a certain way. By detaching from that we can see our children as whole and complete, each having the ability to express what they want (based on developmental level) and also creates an environment of mutual respect, where both parties think that their needs matter and they are conscious that their needs and the other person’s well-being are interdependent.

So, wow. Just wow.

So do you see the effects of this, the potential? It means validating their feelings, acknowledging them as being just as important as, say, mine. I thought I was doing this, but I can see in some of the examples that there have been times when I resorted to the "I'm the mom and you should do it because I said so" mentality. On the flip side, I do believe that there are times, esecially those relating to immediate safety, that there is a need for absolute authority. After all, someone has to be the captain of the ship. But at the same time, if that aura of mutual respect is there, moving into a space of authority still works.

Sound interesting? Then I invite you to read the article. And I'd love to hear your thoughts.

P.S. Want some other thoughts on looking at children differently? I didn't write this wonderful piece on children and love but I'm a co-owner of the site.

Hollywood Power Players Show Their Kids How To Be Creeps

Kelly Mills — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 21:29:00 GMT

Here's a lovely story: Hollywood big shots use their power and position to take their kids to advance screenings of children's movies and shows and so on. Okay. But as it turns out, these parents sometimes have to weasel and threaten to make sure Junior gets a first look at the latest kid flick. And even worse, a kind of one-upping and power playing has become part of the allure for some on the A, B, and C-lists. Check it: "A lot of these parents simply want to be heroes at home. Still, as with most matters involving the inner workings of the entertainment business, this jockeying carries a heavy flavor of status and bragging rights." Um, gross. Feeling all special because you have the power to get your kid into the latest film screening is lame, but it's equally as lame to go all out to try and impress your own children. Note to industry folks: we are supposed to be raising and caring for our kids, not bowling them over with our star pull, okay? "Look honey, Daddy's a bigshot!"

I wish that was the end of it, but naturally, there's more ick to come. There's tales of kids having to smile pretty for the camera on the red carpet, because naturally the studios love the celeb offspring at screenings since it gets the film publicity. Fame-whoring your youngsters is obnoxious. And worst of all, creeps (like Pat O'Brien of show The Insider) have no problem bumping the little people out of their seats, or making celebs with less fame power move to worse seats when a hotter commodity comes knocking with brood in tow. In short, the spawn of the Hollywood elite are getting front row seats to lessons on acting like a total asshole.