Strollerderby : swimming

They Say: Swimming Pools? Yeah, They're Kind Of Gross

Jen Chaney — Sun, 24 May 2009 19:28:00 GMT

Memorial Day weekend is traditionally the kick-off of the summer season at most community pools around the country. But after reading this post, you may be a little less enthusiastic about taking the kids for their inaugural dip.

It may not exactly surprise anyone to learn that swimming pools aren't the most sanitary places in the world. But my eyebrows raised a little when I read this CNN.com story that says a recent study conducted by the Water Quality and Health Council revealed that 17 percent of adults sometimes pee in the pool. Let me get this straight: these are adults who (I.P.) freely admitted to a group that studies water quality that they sometimes let a little leak out when they're practicing their butterfly strokes? That leads me to believe that perhaps even more adults who participated in this survey may do the same thing, but simply weren't honest when asked. Translation: every time you think you're just going swimming, you're actually splashing around in a big, festering, germ-filled community toilet.

Honestly, if the over-21-year-olds can't hold it in, what are the odds that all those water-winged four-year-olds can? (Um ... zero.)

Of course, many of us have long suspected this and we still go swimming all the time anyway. Why? Because it's fun, it's refreshing, we've never gotten ill because of it and, most importantly, if we pretend the pee isn't there, it doesn't bother us. (Denial rules.)

Seriously, once we start focusing too obsessively on all the germs and bodily fluids we can pick up at places like this, I think it's only a matter of time before we wind up in Howard Hughes-ville. The best thing we parents can do is make sure our kids are not contributing to the pool grime, and that the pools they swim in are maintained properly. The CNN story points out the importance of showering before going swimming, for example. And it also notes ways to tell if the pool is clean, like listening for signs that the filtration system is functioning, spotting the presence of a working drain and (this one kind of cracks me up) feeling the tiles and sides of the pool to make sure they are neither sticky nor slippery. Okay, sticky would seem a little strange. But slippery? I'm not sure I've ever touched a wet tile surface that wasn't slippery. Then again, I always assumed that most grown-ups know better than to piss in a pool, so what the heck do I know?

Also, it's probably a good idea to train kids as soon as possible that they shouldn't use the pool as a potty. Heck, if need be, remind some adults, too. Because together, America, we can stop unnecessary peeing in the pool, and ensure that we're all swimming in water that contains slightly less bacteria in the future than it does today.

They Say: Early Swim Lessons Help Prevent Drowning

Kate Tuttle — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 14:57:00 GMT

And we say, duh. But it's not quite as obvious as it sounds, it turns out. Apparently, the accepted wisdom regarding swimming lessons had been to hold of until a child is five or older -- that's according to the old advice from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Their fear was that younger kids who had had lessons (and their parents) would be endangered by a false sense of confidence around bodies of water. And after all, you can drown even if you've had swimming lessons.

But a new study suggests that swimming lessons for kids of all ages can help prevent drowning. Researchers looked at child deaths by drowning over a two-year period, comparing the victims' experience with swimming against other children the same age in their locations. According to lead author Dr. Ruth A. Brenner, the data indicated that swimming lessons did decrease the risk of drowning among young children (though the study adds the standard caution that even good swimmers can drown).

Does this mean you should ever let your young kids run around near an ungated pool, or leave them to swim unsupervised? Hell no. But does it mean that early exposure to water and swimming are not just a fun warm-weather activity but can also provide valuable skills that may help them in the future? Yes. Now if only I could find a mom-friendly swimsuit...

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They Say: Pool Water's Toxic for Baby

JeanneSager — Sun, 05 Apr 2009 18:21:00 GMT

Nobody wants to think of their kids taking in sips full of toxic water. But a new study says all the disinfectants we've been using to keep our drinking and swimming water clean may be doing just the opposite.

The ten-year study funded by the Environmental Protection Agency found that disinfectants mixing with organic matter in our water to create "disinfectant by-products" (DBP) with some pretty risky consequences.

"Some of these are toxic, some can cause birth defects, some are genotoxic, which damage DNA, and some we know are also carcinogenic," geneticist Michael Plewa said in HSDailyWire.com.

The scary part, as we head into summer, is the significant amount of DBPs found in swimming pools, where Plewa says body hair, urine (we all know kids pee in the pool) and other bits of human mix with the disinfectants in the pool. Because poolwater is generally recycled, Plewa says the concentration of DBPs in a swimming pool is tenfold what it is in drinking water. And babies, whose parents love to take them into the pool to escape the summer heat, are more susceptible than any of us to the damaging affects of DBPs.

So what can you do? Stay out of public pools - where people are doing all kinds of nasty. Stick your kids in fresh disinfectant-free water in a baby wading pool (and keep a VERY close eye on them), and wait until scientists come up with some new wonder product. . . which they'll find out twenty years down the line also causes cancer, but hey, what we don't know won't kills us. Right?

Image: ScienceDaily

Why the puppy games are better than the Olympics

Brett Singer — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 19:00:00 GMT

OK, that's not true. But if you haven't seen this dopey show on Animal Planet, you're missing out on something very cute.

Here are a few highlights:

1. Commentary: "It's going to be tough to impress the judges." True – because they're goldfish. "This is like a chess match." Indeed – if chess opponents gnawed on the pieces and sniffed each others' butts. Bob Costas doesn't get lines like these.

2. No controversy: As far as we know, the opening ceremonies were real, no protesters, journalists or grandmothers were arrested, and no one is complaining about the puppy's potentially sexist costumes.

3. Who won? Who cares?: They're, you know, dogs. They have no idea where they are or what they're doing. You can still cheer for your favorite breed (the Cocker Spaniel is really cute) but at the end of the day, it's all up to the judges… who are goldfish.

4. Two words: Waterbowl Cam.

Not sure if they're going to air this again or not, if so, I highly recommend watching it. There are a bunch of video clips on Discovery.com; here's one of the Gymnastics event.

source/image: Animal Planet

Other Old Olympians

Olympics Opening Uses One Girl's Voice, Another Girl's Face

Bela Karolyi likes to kill things

Did Michael Phelps actually win 8 medals?

Michael Phelps to endorse Frosted Flakes

Olympic Athletes To Be Tested . . . For Gender

Jon Stewart Tackles Olympic Controversies

Michael Phelps father in Baltimore, not Beijing

33 year old mom wins silver medal, saves son from leukemia

Dara Torres inspired two current Olympians

Aussie Rower keeps his kids close

Protesters and journalists arrested in China (video)

Whole lotta fakin' goin' on at the opening ceremony

Shawn Johnson more mature than her coach

Volleyball hasn’t come a long way, baby

They Say: no junk food ads at the Olympics

Brett Singer — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 16:00:00 GMT

Like 30 million plus people, I've been watching a lot of Olympics the past few days. Which means I've seen a lot of commercials from the sponsors of the Games; I think I've seen that McDonald's ad touting chicken sandwiches for breakfast (ew) at least 50 times.

Two watchdog groups, Commercial Alert and Multinational Monitor, have released a study titled, "The Commercial Games." According to AdWeek, "The study is highly critical of the sponsorship and advertising policies of the International Olympic Committee and the various sports federations and national committees under its auspices…The groups argue that the marketing of junk foods, sodas, fast-food chains and alcoholic beverages should be eliminated from the Games. Their reasoning: such products conflict with the stated purpose of the Olympics, which they say is to 'celebrate healthful living.'…Promoting such products in the widely watched Olympics…is 'unhealthful,' and particularly inappropriate 'for an event with enormous appeal to children.'" The groups slam McDonald's and Coca-Cola the hardest, saying that both companies, "run businesses centered around unhealthy food," and suggest that, "The Olympics should not lend its name and aura to help promote more consumption of these unhealthy products."

In what could be the funniest bit of corporate protestation ever, McDonald's "objected to the study's labeling of its product as 'unhealthy,'" presumably because they now offer apple slices and stuff like that. (Don't worry; you can get "low-fat caramel dipping sauce" with them.) The International Olympic Committee (IOC) does not accept ads from liquor companies, although beer and wine are OK. Not surprisingly, Commercial Alert and Multinational Monitor think the IOC should ban beer and wine ads as well.

The reason for all of these ads is, of course, money. According to Ad Week, there are 63 sponsors at this years' Games, which sounds like a lot, although it doesn’t say how that compares to previous years. The article quotes "brand consultant" Robert Passikoff as saying that 63 might be too many sponsors, but he defends the IOC's right to sell as many ads as they can: "The question is why should they cut back? They're making an awful lot of money on it. Why should anyone other than the consumers and the marketing folks be the arbiter of what's right and wrong? No research group should have the right to tell them who to do business with; who put them in charge?"

Is Passikoff right? Or should the IOC be more selective about whom they allow to sponsor the Olympics?

Source: AdWeek, Image: MSNBC

Protesters and journalists arrested in China (video)

Whole lotta fakin' goin' on at the opening ceremony

Team more mature than coach

Other Old Olympians

Michael Phelps father in Baltimore, not Beijing

Like father like son

Aussie Rower keeps his kids close

Dara Torres inspired two current Olympians

Some Parenting Lessons From Michael Phelps's Mom

Gold (OK, Silver) Medal Girlcrush: Dana Torres

Volleyball hasn’t come a long way, baby

Baby survives tornado

Egyptian woman gives birth to septuplets because she wanted a boy

Jon Stewart Tackles Olympic Controversies

Olympics Opening Uses One Girl's Voice, Another Girl's Face

Do All These Chinese Gymnasts Look 16 to You?

Did Michael Phelps actually win 8 medals?

Brett Singer — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 19:00:00 GMT

Usually when an athlete is accused of cheating, it's a doping issue: this year alone, at least four athletes have been caught using banned substances. But in Michael Phelps' case, there may be something else going on.

Here's the deal, as reported in the New York Times:

The race in which Phelps won his seventh medal, tying Mark Spitz and setting him up to break the record for most gold at one Olympic Games, was decided by 1/100th of a second. Despite some "controversy" (that's what the article says; I don't recall hearing anything about this when it happened) over the results of the 100-meter butterfly, the authority that oversees swimming (FINA) decided not to release video images to help "prove" that Phelps was the winner.

What does this have to do with Michael Phelps? Well, Omega is the official timekeeper of the Olympics. They are also one of Phelps' sponsors. As the New York Times puts it, "The most visible athlete at these Games is getting a paycheck from the same company whose equipment decides the outcome of Phelps’s events."

To me, this is much ado about nothing, and an attempt to create a problem where there isn't one.

In the first place, FINA doesn’t typically release images of the races, which the Times article mentions but not until the middle of the article. Second, Omega didn't make the decision, FINA did. And third… I don't know, is anyone all that upset about this? Is that because we desperately wanted Phelps to break Spitz's record? Maybe. Personally, I didn't care that much; although some of the races were a lot of fun to watch (like when we beat the French in the relay after they had said they would "crush" the U.S. team – put that in your beret, Frenchie!), by the time Phelps won his eighth gold medal I found I had a certain amount of Phelps Phatigue. That's not to take anything away from him; I just think the coverage got to be a little bit overblown.

If you want to talk about weird judging issues, what about the gymnastics, where the judges clearly favored the Chinese team? (Béla Károlyi, despite being a little bit scary, was right on with much of his analysis.) And if you want to say that there are potential conflicts of interest between certain parties at the Games, I'm sure there is plenty to talk about. I'm not sure, however, that this is an actual controversy.

On the other hand – isn't it fun to have two opinions on the same topic? – why not just release the images? The photo shown here certainly doesn't do much to dispel the notion that perhaps the end result of the race wasn't what we were told it was. Sports ethicists (there's a job I want) interviewed by the Times say that FINA should release whatever information is necessary to keep people from thinking that the results were tainted, especially in this case, since it is so high profile.

Image/source: NYTimes

Other Old Olympians

Michael Phelps father in Baltimore, not Beijing

Whole lotta fakin' goin' on at the opening ceremony

Protesters and journalists arrested in China (video)

Dara Torres inspired two current Olympians

Elderly Chinese Women Sentenced to "Re-Education"

Some Parenting Lessons From Michael Phelps's Mom

Gold (OK, Silver) Medal Girlcrush: Dana Torres

Volleyball hasn’t come a long way, baby

Table Tennis Women, Flaunt Your Stuff!

Baby survives tornado

Aussie Rower keeps his kids close

Team more mature than coach

Michael Phelps to endorse Frosted Flakes

Brett Singer — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 16:30:00 GMT

Maybe they should call them Phrosted Phlakes?

Once upon a time, Wheaties was the Breakfast of Champions, but now its Frosted Flakes. Michael Phelps will appear on a box of Tony the Tiger's favorite (phavorite? OK, OK, I'll stop) morning meal.

Naturally, some are upset with Phelps for choosing to endorse a sugary breakfast cereal. "In a country where childhood obesity is an alarming issue, Phelps' iconic image sharing space with Tony the Tiger sends the wrong message, experts say."

Personally, I doubt that any kid will buy Frosted Flakes because Phelps' image is on the box, although Kellogg's probably hopes I'm very wrong. And we know he did it because they offered him more money, rather than a more "moral" reason. Since swimming can't touch baseball or football in terms of the money an athlete can earn for competing, I don't think I have a problem with Michael making as much as he can while he can make it, especially since the IOC seems to be raking it in from their 63 sponsors.

source/image: NY Daily News

Protesters and journalists arrested in China (video)

Whole lotta fakin' goin' on at the opening ceremony

Team more mature than coach

Other Old Olympians

Michael Phelps father in Baltimore, not Beijing

Like father like son

Aussie Rower keeps his kids close

Dara Torres inspired two current Olympians

Some Parenting Lessons From Michael Phelps's Mom

Gold (OK, Silver) Medal Girlcrush: Dana Torres

Volleyball hasn’t come a long way, baby

Baby survives tornado

Egyptian woman gives birth to septuplets because she wanted a boy

Jon Stewart Tackles Olympic Controversies

Olympics Opening Uses One Girl's Voice, Another Girl's Face

Do All These Chinese Gymnasts Look 16 to You?

Other Old Olympians

Brett Singer — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 15:00:00 GMT

Dara Torres is 41, and Oksana Chusovitina is 33 (and saved her son from leukemia), but they aren't even close to the oldest Olympic athletes in history, or even this year. Most aren't in the more physically strenuous events, but competing in anything at their age is pretty impressive.

* Iain Murray is on the Australian Olympic sailing team, and at age 50 is making his Olympic debut. Murray is Australia's oldest Olympian; Andrew Palfrey, a teammate, is 41 and also competing in his first Olympics.

* Luan Jujie was 50 years old in 1984 when she won a Gold medal in fencing for Canada.

* Susan Nattrass is 57 and currently in Beijing on the Canadian shooting team. In 1976, she became the first woman shooter to compete in the Olympics.

* Hiroshi Hoketsu, a Japanese equestrian, made his Olympic debut in 1964 and is now back for a second time – at age 67.

* Oscar Swahn (Shooting) competed in his last Olympics in 1920 at the age of – are you ready for this? – 72. (He was planning to go in 1924 but he got sick. Wimp.) Over his career, Swahn won three gold medals, two bronze, and a silver in 1920, making him the oldest Olympic medallist ever. Fun fact: his son competed with him in 1908, 1912 and 1920.

For more, see NBCOlympics.com

Image/Source: nbcolympics.com

Dara Torres inspired two current Olympians

Some Parenting Lessons From Michael Phelps's Mom

Gold (OK, Silver) Medal Girlcrush: Dana Torres

Volleyball hasn’t come a long way, baby

Baby survives tornado

Aussie Rower keeps his kids close

Egyptian woman gives birth to septuplets because she wanted a boy

Protesters and journalists arrested in China (video)

Whole lotta fakin' goin' on at the opening ceremony

Team more mature than coach

Jon Stewart Tackles Olympic Controversies

Olympics Opening Uses One Girl's Voice, Another Girl's Face

Do All These Chinese Gymnasts Look 16 to You?

Like father like son

Michael Phelps father in Baltimore, not Beijing

Brett Singer — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 13:00:00 GMT

We've seen quite a bit of Michael Phelps' mom Debbie in Beijing. Bob Costas interviewed her and her record-setting spawn after Mike beat Mark Spitz's record by winning of eight medals in one Olympic games.

But Phelps pop, Fred, isn't there. Where is he? He's at home, in Baltimore. Watching the games on TV.

According to multiple sources, "Fred and Debbie separated for good in 1993, and the divorce was finalized the next year, when Michael was 9." This site implies that Fred "walked out" on Debbie and Michael, which I guess is possible, but I don't know since this is the only source of that I've found.

The same site claims to have a photo of Fred Phelps, but I think the photo on Cleveland.com is more accurate.

That article, written by Tim Warsinskey, asks the question, "Are you wondering what I'm wondering?" Tim wanted to know where Phelps' dad is; as a reason, he says that he is a father himself. I'm a dad as well, but I have to admit that "where's Michael's father?" isn't a question I asked as I watched the Olympics.

For his part, Fred said, "This is just about Michael. This is his glory, his time to shine, and I want him to get everything he wants." So even if he did "walk out" on his family (not saying he did, just saying if) at least he's not trying to claim that he's the reason Michael won all that gold.

image: Cleveland.com

Some Parenting Lessons From Michael Phelps's Mom

Gold (OK, Silver) Medal Girlcrush: Dana Torres

Volleyball hasn’t come a long way, baby

Baby survives tornado

Aussie Rower keeps his kids close

Egyptian woman gives birth to septuplets because she wanted a boy

Protesters and journalists arrested in China (video)

Whole lotta fakin' goin' on at the opening ceremony

Team more mature than coach

Jon Stewart Tackles Olympic Controversies

Olympics Opening Uses One Girl's Voice, Another Girl's Face

Do All These Chinese Gymnasts Look 16 to You?

Like father like son

33 year old mom wins silver medal, saves son from leukemia

Brett Singer — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 15:00:00 GMT

Dara Torres is an inspiration to many, competing in the Olympics at age 41, and winning. But I think the story of Oksana Chusovitina, a German gymnast, might be even more inspiring.

Here's the deal: Oksana is from Uzbekistan. Her son was diagnosed with leukemia at the age of 3. There were no beds for him in her home country. Because of her gymnastics ability, she was able to move to Germany and join their team, while also getting her little boy the treatment he needed.

He seems to be doing better now, and to make the story even better, she just won a silver medal. She's also 33 years old in a sport where 22 is considered really old. Congratulations to her, and to her son.

Source/image: Detroit Free Press

Olympic Parenting: Oksana Chusovitina and Alisher

Gold (OK, Silver) Medal Girlcrush: Dana Torres

Volleyball hasn’t come a long way, baby

Baby survives tornado

Aussie Rower keeps his kids close

Egyptian woman gives birth to septuplets because she wanted a boy

Protesters and journalists arrested in China (video)

Whole lotta fakin' goin' on at the opening ceremony

Team more mature than coach

Jon Stewart Tackles Olympic Controversies

Olympics Opening Uses One Girl's Voice, Another Girl's Face

Do All These Chinese Gymnasts Look 16 to You?

Like father like son

Dara Torres inspired two current Olympians

Brett Singer — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Back in the year 2000, Dara "Superwoman" Torres was at a swimming camp in California. Two sisters, Sandra and Danielle Fong, were fascinated by her, and the medal she had just won at the Santa Clara International Invitational. So she did what anyone would do: she gave them her medal.

OK, that's not what everyone would do. But it is what Dara did. And now, eight years later, both of the Fong sisters will be competing in the Olympics, although not in swimming. 18-year-old Sandra Fong is on the U.S. shooting team. Danielle Fong, 17, has cerebral palsy and will shoot for the U.S. at the Paralympics in September.

Torres, in case you didn't know, just won a Silver medal – at the age of 41. So yeah, we like her.

Image/source: nytimes.com

Read more:

Gold (OK, Silver) Medal Girlcrush: Dana Torres

33 year old mom wins silver medal, saves son from leukemia

Aussie Rower keeps his kids close

Protesters and journalists arrested in China (video)

Whole lotta fakin' goin' on at the opening ceremony

Team more mature than coach

Jon Stewart Tackles Olympic Controversies

Hunka hunka burnin Barbie

Olympics Opening Uses One Girl's Voice, Another Girl's Face

Matthew McConaughey keeps placenta

Do All These Chinese Gymnasts Look 16 to You?

Birth inspires lottery ticket purchase

Retarded movie boycott

Gold (OK, Silver) Medal Girlcrush: Dana Torres

Amy Kuras — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 21:02:00 GMT

I'll admit it – I have a huge, full-on girlcrush on Dara Torres. She's 41 years old, people, has a body most women half her age would envy, shows both really great sportsmanship (congratulating other swimmers with a big smile, asking the ref to delay the start of qualifying heats so a Swedish swimmer could switch out her ripped suit for a good one) and a tough competitive spirit, and oh yes, is the mom of a two-year-old.

Admittedly, she has significant financial resources – this June story in the New York Times magazine pegs her training costs at around $100,000 per year – and has won only one individual medal, the silver in the 50 meter freestyle she picked up last night.

But I find her enormously inspiring, that someone could come back from childbirth and be not just as good as she once was, but better. I think all of us who’ve struggled a little bit to find our new identities after having children can find some inspiration in that.

I also love that she shows mothers can be healthily competitive, and not just over the stupid stuff we can allow ourselves to get bogged down in like who has the nicest strller or the cutest haircut or the most stylishly attired kid. Most women are smarter than that, and athletes like Torres show how much smarter.

As for me? I am about as unathletic as a person can be (seriously, I once needed stitches from banging my head on a barbell) and the only medals I get are of the "participant" variety. But when I hop on a treadmill at the Y tomorrow, I'll be thinking about her and hoping someday I can kick one-tenth the ass.

Some Parenting Lessons From Michael Phelps's Mom

Jen Chaney — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 12:02:00 GMT

Deborah Phelps -- mother of swimming stallion and Olympic gold-medalist Michael Phelps -- could teach us all a few lessons about parenting.

As this New York Times article notes, she didn't have it easy as a mom. Following a divorce, she raised three kids, including Michael, as a single parent. And when the budding athlete was in fifth grade, she had to deal with the possibility that he might have A.D.H.D. But she did several things right, as the following list -- again, based on the Times story -- indicates. It's a reminder that we all have the ability to bring up children who can maximize their potential, no matter what anyone else says.

1. She Ignored Nay-Sayers. As a school teacher herself, Deborah Phelps listened and took it to heart when teachers told her that Michael was having problems in school. But she didn't accept one's assessment that: "Your son will never be able to focus on anything." She heard it, but she didn't accept it. Instead, she focused on how to help Michael. (P.S. That teacher has to feel pretty stupid right about now.)

2. She Took the Advice of Medical Professionals. When the family doctor said he thought Michael had A.D.H.D., she put the boy on Ritalin to see if it made a difference. She says it did improve his ability to focus but not as significantly as she might have hoped. Still, she was willing to take a doctor's advice, then resort to Plan B. And that meant...

3. She Listened to Her Child. After two years on Ritalin, Michael said he didn't want to take it anymore because he always had to go to the nurse at lunch for his pill, and that made him uncomfortable. After considering that and again consulting with the doctor, she took him off the meds. Obviously kids don't always know what's best for them, but allowing him to play a role in making decisions for himself surely created a level of trust between Michael and his mom.

4. She Played to His Strengths. When Michael couldn't focus on reading, she gave him the sports pages to read. And when he clearly proved he could excel and focus on swimming, she encouraged his gifts. As a result, he is one of the all-time greats (if not the greatest) in swimming history.

Deborah Phelps has every reason to be enormously proud of her son. But she can be pretty proud of herself, too. Under trying circumstances and while dealing with plenty of self-doubt (she still says she's not sure putting him on Ritalin was the right choice), Deborah Phelps did a hell of a job raising that kid.

Dana Torres, 41, Makes Olympic Team

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Sat, 05 Jul 2008 16:32:00 GMT

Proving that 40 is the new 30, Dana Torres, superstar swim sensation and mother, made her 5th Olympic Team this week.

Old babes everywhere rejoice.

Ms. Torres will be the oldest American to make the Olympics team heading to Beijing this summer.

The XXIX Olympiad will require her to be away from her 2 year old daughter for a month. This is the only downside to her making the grade, according to Ms. Torres.

[Photo Credit: Sports Illustrated]

An Inconvenient Kiddie Pool Truth

Jen Chaney — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 13:02:00 GMT

Go ahead, let your kids splash around in that kiddie pool. Just remember that you're killing the Earth while they're doing it.

Okay, maybe I'm being a little harsh. But based on this item from the environmental Web site Grist.com, there really is no green version of the backyard pool. Both the hard, plastic kind and the inflatable ones are made from PVC/vinyl, which is not good for the environment and potentially hazardous to our health. And then there is that whole business of using all that excess water, which isn't environmentally sound either.

Grist recommends taking the boys and girls to a public wading pool. Or, if you have to go the kiddie pool route, buy a used one at a yard sale so as not to add more PVC material to the global mix. It seems weird to me that there isn't some eco-friendly alternative here. Maybe some savvy manufacturer can come up with one before next summer.

All I know is that I'm afraid to even ask what's wrong with the Slip and Slide.

Photo: Grist.com

Boy Drowns While Taking a Nap

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 19:24:00 GMT

I apologize for bringing you a truly heart-wrenching news item, but this is a story that should be known by both parents and caretakers. A few days ago, 10-year-old Johnny Jackson splashed in a swimming pool for about an hour, while his mother looked on. He took in a bit of water, coughed, and then kept splashing around in his floaties.

Later that day, Johnny defecated in his pants twice and said he was really tired. He was bathed and put himself down for a nap, seeming a bit under the weather, but generally fine. When his mom went to check on him a short time later, she found him unconscious. The coroner determined that the cause of his death was asphyxiation by drowning.

How is this possible? Johnny probably suffered from what is known as “secondary drowning,” which can happen when one ingests as little as four ounces of water. Depending on what’s in the fluid, even this small amount can damage the lungs so severely that they end up filled with fluids from the rest of the body, leaving no room for air.

Fortunately, the early sign of secondary drowning is very clear: unusual lethargy after swimming.

Photo: ABC News

16 Lies Your Mom Told You

Cole Gamble — Mon, 05 May 2008 17:00:00 GMT

What better way to celebrate the upcoming Mother’s Day than with a list of all the lies Mom told you?

Here’s the one my mom always laid on me: cracking your knuckles is bad. Well here I am, still popping my knuckles. How do you like that ma? Now would someone pick up my coffee cup and place it in my claw.

Here’s another: kids shouldn’t drink coffee, it stunts their growth. I did, and it didn’t. Nothing got me ready for a day of kindergarten like three or four cups of black coffee. Didn’t stunt my growth one bit, I’m like 7’5”. (Margin of error +or- 2 feet)

Among mommy’s other big untruths:

Sitting close to the TV is bad for you.

Don’t make that face or it will stay that way.

Swallow that gum and it will sit in your stomach for seven years. Wait an hour after eating before swimming.

Check out the full list here.

So there you go, mom, I can see through your lies. Happy Mother’s Day!

Chinese Girl Swims River With Feet and Hands Bound

Madeline Holler — Sat, 06 Oct 2007 18:41:00 GMT

Hey, I thought they stopped binding feet in China a while ago.

This week, a Hunan father tied up his eight-year-old daughter's arms and legs and tossed her in the Xiang River for a three-hour swim. He says his daughter swam like a dolphin, covered a mile and loved it the whole time.

She is training to swim the English Channel, a goal she is desperate to achieve, her father (a teacher and self-made trainer) said. The dolphin-style swimming practice was his idea, and he assures everyone who condemned the feat/feet that she was never in danger since he was swimming next to her the entire time.

(Side note: Am I the only one thinking fondly of Patrick Duffy’s swimming techniques in the tragically unacclaimed late-70s/early-80s television series “The Man from Atlantis”?)

Back to the girl: English Channel administration is pretty much saying “over our Coast Guard’s dead body" regarding (1) swimming with bound limbs in English waters and (2) anyone under 16 years old swimming the Channel for an official record.

That’s bad news for yet another eight-year-old girl, this one from India, who is also training to swim the 21-mile stretch of choppy waters, which also happens to be the world’s busiest shipping lane.

How many other eight-year-olds are training to swim these marathon distances? I'm getting the impression that my kids are lazy.

Photo: Daily Mail

Two Week Old Swimming Baby?? Why?

Karen Murphy — Wed, 03 Oct 2007 14:03:00 GMT

Aaaand, another entry in the already-crowded department of WTF Parenting: swimming lessons for a two-week old baby! Um, I don't know about what newbornland was like in your house, but in MY house, and I did this FOUR TIMES PEOPLE, at my house when the baby was two weeks old it pretty much was just crying and pooping and sucking a lot.

Have I missed something here? Did I get issued the wrong kind of baby, maybe? Ohhh, I see the problem:

The baby swimming lessons are given by someone named "Budge." That surely explains...something, doesn't it?

OK, what else?

Um, sorry, I don't actually find any reasonable explanation as to why someone would take a two-week old baby swimming. Six months? Sure! They're practically human by then! But at two weeks? Their eyes aren't even open by then, are they? (oops, that's kittens, whatever)

Frankly, pictures of even older babies swimming blithely underwater freak me out. What do you think? Swimming for tiny babies? Yea or nay?

P.S. Oh. My youngest was born in a pool. Yes, I'm the world's biggest hypocrite. I'm still freaked out by the swimming babies.

Kiddie Pools to Help End Summer With a Splash

Patti — Wed, 25 Jul 2007 19:01:00 GMT

We plan to buy a little pool for our kids as soon as we can settle the argument of whether it should take up valuable patio real estate or kill a big patch of grass on the lawn. It's...almost August. We may work this out in time to grab something crappy on sale and use it once before it gets too cold.

You, on the other hand, are probably in the market for a replacement pool already. Whatever you bought late last spring has probably cracked in the heat of the sun or developed a slow leak that causes a tidal wave after a half-hour of horseplay. So for you, Slate has reviewed some kiddie pools that you'll want to check out or carefully avoid.

How cute is that flower pool? I'd probably buy it even if it wasn't the highest-ranked pool in Slate's test. And if I could talk my husband into allowing a big flower-shaped dead spot in his precious lawn. Why yes, I am married to Hank Hill, thanks for asking.