Strollerderby : vacations

They Say: Planning to Work Until the First Contraction? Plan for Surgery.

Miriam Axel-Lute — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 20:00:00 GMT

Women who worked up until their due date had four times the rate of c-sections as women who started their maternity leave at 35 weeks, a new study from UC Berkeley has found.

Now, I'm not sure how you can control for self-selection in that kind of study. I imagine that women starting their maternity leave early are both more likely to be placing a priority on their birth experience and better off financially, each of which could affect their outcomes. (I'm assuming they excluded people with scheduled c-sections from the study.)

On the other hand, the results were is four times as likely, not a titchy 10 to 15 percent or something. That, as Dr. Seuss might say, is a whopping number, and it makes me inclined to think there really is something going on here.

It's not really hard to imagine what either: On the one hand, there's the stress of trying to do your job with an open-ended question of whether you might have to leave at a moment's notice, trying to have things ready and yet still work, with bosses and people who are going to step into your shoes watching you anxiously. And other hand, there's the stress of trying to decide when/if you have to leave when contractions start, whether you're up for driving yourself home, when to call the family, and then changing gears in an instant from worker to woman-in-labor. Hardly optimal conditions.

I was lucky: Since I was leaving my job instead of taking maternity leave, it was easier for me to choose to set my last day at 35 weeks. And I have to say, since my daughter came early (37 weeks and 2 days), I'm extremely glad I did. Even though you never exactly feel prepared, having tied up loose ends, cleared out my desk and said my goodbyes and then taking those two weeks free of deadline pressure and office details to sleep/nest/prepare felt wonderful. It may be the closest thing to taking a complete vacation without traveling I've ever done. Can I prove that that helped with my fairly uncomplicated birth? Of course not, but I wouldn't be surprised.

I know how much of a luxury that sounds like to so many people. I sure as hell couldn't blithely skip five (or even two) weeks of work now. In general, it's hard enough to get maternity or paternity leave at all, and the UC Berkeley researchers, while advocating strongly that maternity leave start earlier, note that people who choose to work up to their due date (or up to their labor as the case often is) are usually doing so because they can't afford maternity leave after the birth otherwise, and clearly that trumps.

I guess for now we can add the health advantages they've identified to the list of casualties of our work-over-family culture.

Image from Take Back Your Time.

More by this author:

10 Signs You Might Need a Childfree Vacation

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 16:01:00 GMT

Some of us are heading to the BlogHer Conference in San Francisco this week, (and if you can't make this one, don't miss the BlogHer Reach Out Tour coming to a city near you). As I fidget with joy at the prospect of waiting for my flight which departs in 2 hours, it occurs to me that staycations notwithstanding sometimes there is absolutely nothing as delicious as kid-free vacations of one kind or another.

Here are 10 signs you might be in similar straits:

1. Grocery shopping is your alone time.

2. Going to work is the highlight of your day.

3. You and your partner discuss poop and sleep more than you discuss daily news or getting it on.

4. You no longer remember the pure joy of reading the Sunday paper front to back in bed with strong coffee.

5. The last book you read was written by Dr. Seuss.

6. Dressing up means getting out of your sweats.

7. The sound of small children talking starts to sound less like a babbling brook and more like someone pouring acid in your ear.

8. You find yourself short-tempered and negative with anyone under age 20.

9. You think you might have at one time been an extrovert, but now you're definitely an introvert.

10. When people ask you what you do for fun, you have absolutely no idea what to say.

Never fear that the costs of a kid-free vacation make it impossible. Maybe you can swap with a friend or family member to watch your kids overnight so you and your partner (or just you) can get away. Even if it's one night in a Super 8, you'll relish every minute of it.

[Photo Credit: Bellingham Herald]

12 of the 100 Greatest Places to Vacation

Brett Singer — Sat, 26 Apr 2008 14:00:00 GMT

Life Magazine has just come out with a new tome -- LIFE: Dream Destinations: The World's 100 Greatest Places to Vacation. Twelve spots are chosen for families, and here they are:

London: The wife and I took Thing 1 and his Gramma to London when he was only 2 years old. It was great. There's a lot to do that can appeal to even a young kid (the Globe Theater, changing of the guard, and eating fish and chips in a pub were a few highlights). Depending on where you stay, there can be a lot of walking and/or tube riding, so if you are more Country Mouse than City Mouse, just be prepared for a potentially urban adventure. Highly recommended.

Riviera Maya: I had to look this one up (I don't get out much). This is an area of Mexico designed for tourists. This site has some info on family-friendly vacations in the area.

Orlando: Um, duh. Disney. Other theme parks. Sun. Fun. Go.

Wisconsin Dells: The "Waterpark Capital of the World." 18 indoor and 3 outdoor waterparks, one of which, Noah's Ark, is the largest in the United States. Never been but it sounds pleasant enough, if a tad soggy.

The Ahwahnee Hotel, Yosemite Valley, California: this sounds a lot like…nature. For those who like that kind of thing, you can't go wrong. If not, go to London, or Orlando.

New York City: I live here and we hate tourists. OK, we don't hate you. But we wish you wouldn't stand in the middle of Times Square and not move. (I kid. Well, not about the standing in the street part.) Obviously, there are millions of things to do for those with families and without. The notion of New York as scary place is gone, although personally I would stay away from Bushwick. Bonus: we have a new Governor!

The Bahamas: Why not? Can I go now?

Snowmass, Aspen, Colorado: Aspen is incredibly beautiful. Also kind of expensive. Snowmass, a ski resort, just opened the Treehouse Kids' Adventure Center, which sounds fun. If you don't ski, this probably isn't for you. But if you do, have at it.

Memphis: Even if you aren't an Elvis fanatic (and if you are, it's OK, you can admit it. There now, wasn't that easy?), there's plenty to do in Memphis, including a Children's Museum, Zoo, and the Mud Island River Park (Mississippi Mud, of course).

Cuzco, Peru: these pictures look intriguing. I like Peruvian food. Need to practice my Spanish though. (De donde esta el... hey, give me a break, it's been awhile.)

Montana’s Dude Ranches: Dude! Who doesn't want to be a cowboy/girl? Unless the kids are allergic to horses, this sounds like a blast.

The Impossible Dream: Space: Now that's just silly. Isn't it? Until Richard Branson re-opens reservations on Virgin Galactic, and maybe lowers the price a bit ($200,000 a person is a tad high), this option will indeed remain the impossible dream.

Anyone been to any of these places, especially the less well-known spots? What are your favorite vacation destinations?

Mouseblog Part 2-Welcome to Schlepcot

Brett Singer — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 16:30:00 GMT

Disney, Day Two (click here for Day One)

If Walt Disney had been a borscht belt comedian he might have called this place Schlepcot, because walking is definitely something you do a lot of here. Not that I'm complaining: regular movement definitely helps to offset the enormous quantity of fried foods and beef that I expect to consume over the next couple of days.

I'd never been to Epcot. The Michael Jackson attraction is gone (shocking, I know), but there are a tremendous amount of way cool things to see. It's different from The Magic Kingdom - less to do, but also less overwhelming and (I think) less crowded.

First stop is Spaceship Earth, which is housed in this giant golf ball looked thing (OK, a "geosphere") that is the main image I have of Epcot. It starts out as a ride, giving you a tour of technological milestones through the ages. Then you're asked a few questions about how you like to vacation – marketing data, anyone? – and are presented with a personalized account of what your future will look like, complete with a photo of you (well, your head pasted onto an animated body). It's cute, informative, and fun.

Before being dumped into a gift shop, you get to visit "Project Tomorrow: Inventing the World of Tomorrow" which is so cool that it makes you wonder why Disney doesn't make better video games. There's a 3D surgery simulation that's so nifty I might have gone to medical school if I'd seen it when I was younger, and a digital shuffleboard game that aims to teach you about energy conservation – push the wind power icon onto a town that has high power needs, that sort of thing. It's sponsored by Siemens, an engineering company.

Then we hit Innoventions, a nice indoor exhibit. The first stop is the Test The Limits Lab, sponsored by Underwriters Laboratory, or UL. What's that, you ask, and why does it sound so familiar? Well, it's on every piece of electronic equipment you own. UL is a non-profit organization that tests whether or not various products are safe. So basically it's an entire exhibit showcasing product safety testing. It, too, is really cool. Really.

Then it's time to learn about recycling, in an exhibit sponsored by Waste Management, another "hey, I've heard of them" company, although this time it's a tad more obvious what it is they do. Your "team" moves an extremely heavy wheelbarrow through ultra high-tech interactive exhibits that show you what can be done with your trash. Again, informative and trés cool.

A short line later and its time for Fantastic Plastics, where you design and name a robot, then run a race – literally running on a pad, with your speed matched by your on-screen creation. Afterwards everyone gets a plastic robot to assemble.

We also spend time at "The Seas With Nemo and Friends", which is basically a mini aquarium, and see Turtle Talk With Crush. The surfer-accented Finding Nemo character is animated and yet responds to audience questions, which is a nifty bit of "imagineering."

Thing 2 is exhausted and conks out in the stroller with little resistance, so I take him back to the room while the wife and Thing 1 wait on a ludicrously long line for Soarin', which Thing 1 later says is worth the wait. (At 2+ hours for a 4-minute ride, the wife is less inclined to agree.) On my way back, with Thing 2 sacked out in the stroller, there is a long stretch where we don't see anyone for a few minutes. French music is wafting through the breeze as I make my way towards the bridge that will take us back to the Beach Club. It's not reality, but it is a nice version of it.

Next: THE… MAGIC… KINGDOM…

photos from my camera phone

Mouseblog Part 1-The Nappiest Place on Earth

Brett Singer — Thu, 20 Mar 2008 15:30:00 GMT

I'm in Orlando with the family and will file occasional reports from the front.

Day One:

Getting out of New York and over to the Disney Beach Club was interesting, but let's get right to the main event.

Once we got checked in, we needed to eat. There's a lounge upstairs with a nice variety of snacks and beverages, including surprisingly fancy herbal teas; I poured myself a cup and promptly spilled it everywhere. (Hey, I didn't want Thing 2 to be the only one with wet pants.) Then we made our way to the lobby. We considered taking the boat to the Disney-Hollywood Studios Theme Park, but the helpful guide pointed out that Epcot was only a 4-minute walk away. (I didn't time it, but, amazingly, I think he was correct - definitely under 5 minutes.)

Then came the dreaded FINGERTIP SCANNER. For the record, the kids were not asked to put their fingers in, but my wife and I were. The reader is fairly exacting in that if you put your 'tip in the "wrong" way, the turnstile won't turn. The cast member at the gate wasn't exactly stern but did request that we stick our fingers in the thing, without offering another alternative. Since they didn't ask the kids to do it I was somewhat more willing; I'm probably in more databases than I'd care to know about. I still agree with Cory that it's a strange practice, and maybe it'll be worse at The Magic Kingdom.

Once through the gate, and after a little initial map confusion (note to park map designers: a "you are here" indicator is a nice thing), we started our quest for food. This was everyone's first time at Epcot, and it's really amazing. As an adult, you notice different things. I doubt Things 1 or 2 were all that interesting in the landscaping, which was the first thing I noticed. While you don't ever think you're in France, Japan, or anywhere else other than Epcot, you do forget that you are in Florida. The "magic" is so all encompassing that you really do feel as if you've entered another dimension, which I suppose is the whole point. Its nice to know that even a jaded New York parent can allow himself to become enchanted (sorry! I know, I'll turn in my Cynical New Yorker Card when I get back) by the Disney experience.

French food seemed like a bad idea for everyone, and Thing 1 nixed Japanese, although Thing 2 *really* wanted to go up the steps of the Japanese teahouse. After some coaxing, mostly promises of french fries, we went to the American pavilion and had, yes, burgers and fries. The eatery-the food was nothing special, although the burger buns were whole wheat, which was interesting-was decorated with state flags; I had no idea that New York's state flag was "Excelsior" and Massachusetts' was "An Appeal to Heaven" (at least it used to be, it's been changed).

After an aborted mission to get ice cream-the French crepes station has a sign that says ice cream, but there is, in fact, no ice cream for sale-we decided that Thing 2 wasn't going to make it much longer without a nap, so Thing 1 and mom took the boat to Disney-MGM and Thing 2 and I retreated to the room. Napping wasn't exactly in the cards but eventually he dozed off, like a cat, on an ottoman in front of a sunny window.

We've only been here half a day but I have to admit, I'm impressed. I was very prepared to be underwhelmed by everything, as was Thing 1, who confided in me that he was enjoying it "much more" than he thought he would. I still cringe a little when I see grown women dressed as scullery maids cleaning up fallen french fries. But overall, they do a pretty amazing job of taking care of things so that you don't have to think much about anything.

Next: More Epcot, and then...The Magic Kingdom.

Mickey Rat: Disney World as Police State

Brett Singer — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 17:30:00 GMT

Over at BoingBoing, Cory Doctorow writes about an odd security measure at Walt Disney World: fingertip readers.

Actually, "security" isn't really accurate, since the device is designed to keep park visitors from sharing admission passes with persons other than themselves. Cory points out a gaping flaw in the usefulness of the measure, namely that they still accept photo ID. So if one person uses photo ID and the other uses a fingertip, both could enter the park with the same pass (albeit at different times).

Now comes the weird part: the idea that this practice conditions kids "to accept surveillance and routine searches and identity checks without particularized suspicion." Cory tells a story of going to Epcot and, when he tells the "cast member" that it is possible to show ID instead of bring 'tipped, he heard a child shout, "No you have to be fingerprinted! Everybody has to be fingerprinted!" Cue the Twilight Zone theme.

One commenter on BoingBoing (phas3d), who says he used to work for the house of Mouse and still has friends inside the Magic Conglomerate Kingdom, suggests, "the [fingertip] readers have nothing to do with 'security' and everything to do with marketing." ("Be our guest, be our guest, we'll put you in, a database...") If that's true, I wonder about disclosure, since I thought (perhaps incorrectly) that such things had to be opted-into, although perhaps by buying a ticket to the park you agree to let them do whatever they want with your personal data, since Disney isn't marketing to you directly. No matter the reason, it feels unnecessary to be asked to submit to any sort of body scanning that gets stored somewhere before entering an amusement park. When said scanning is of my kids, it feels downright creepy. Yes, it's a fingertip, not a fingerprint, so it isn't the same type of data used by the FBI. But it begs the question - why do it at all?

We're taking a trip to "the happiest place on Earth" soon, and I'm going to look for those readers. I'll be curious if we really can use ID rather than be 'tipped, or if an uninformed "cast member" will say "NYET! You must put your finger in the reader, comrade!"

image: BoingBoing

Keep Kids From Messing Up Your Sex Life

Kelly Mills — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 20:01:00 GMT

By way of the Huffington Post, we now have some tips for ensuring your kids don't ruin your sex life. I'm a little underwhelmed. Guess what is number one? Take out your knives co-sleepers, because the top tip is: Separate beds. Now, I'm not even a family bed kinda gal, but I do know you can have sex in more places than just a bed at nighttime. But maybe group slumber does inhibit the nasty--you can let me know.

Other tips mostly center around making sure everyone gets enough sleep; setting aside couple time in the form of the adult-only vacation and regular date nights; and keeping arguments over discipline and such out of the bedroom (unless you are talking about the other kind of discipline and that happens to be your thing.) Nothing too revolutionary here, though the date night thing always irks me. I know we enjoy date night so much we decided to make it an annual event. I mean, does anyone actually manage to do this with real regularity? The cost of babysitting and a movie or a meal alone necessitates we dip into the kid's college fund. But hey, maybe you regularly do a night out with your sweetie, or even your spouse, so I'll suspend my total disbelief in case scientists discover the rare couple who does this all the time.

Eye-Roll-Inducing "Parenting Trends"

Amy Kuras — Thu, 31 Jan 2008 22:03:00 GMT

One of the first unofficial lessons of Journalism 101: if it happens three times, it's a trend. Or, if it happens to you and at least one of your friends, it's a trend.

So I tend to view stories like this one from Parents.Com about the top 10 parenting trends for 2008 with great skepticism, to say the least. And if you're a regular reader of Strollerderby (and you should be) none of these are news to you. I'll list them anyway, to spare you the nine zillion irritating ads that cover the screen when you're trying to go through the article.

"Creative" baby names. "Semaj" from James? Seriously, people? Just, no. Bill already riffed on this funnier than I can ("silent q" indeed).
Toy safety. Suddenly everyone wants their toys made in the USA. Good luck with that!
Working mothers bringing babies to the workplace. Again, please no. I already aired my feelings about this in a comment on Other Amy's post on the topic – and apparently am in the minority, in a big way.
Sophisicated nurseries. Can't argue with this one, anything I say would solely be out of raw, naked envy for people with money and taste enough to pull these off.
Famiies traveling together more — groups of friends going on vacation, so each set of parents can trade off kid-watching and grownup time. Again, this sounds genius.
Holding baby showers for 2nd and 3rd kids. H to the ELL to the NO. One baby shower and one wedding shower per person per lifetime. End of story. Anything else that's a gifting party, outside of really unusual circumstances, is greedy. Although looking at the comments on this post by Kelly, I totally want a blessingway now
Personalized baby web sites. No problem with these, but our set of faraway grandparents are my in-laws, who are in their 70s. And refer to emails as "letters." So, yeah, not sure how well that would work for us.
Birthday parties with physical activity themes. Don’t they all devolve into malestroms of screamy, running kids, themes or no?
More sentimental push presents for mothers. Rachael already ever-so-eloquently expounded on this.

Discipline — saying no to spoiled kids. This is a trend? A new trend? The hell? What is wrong with us?

I've never been especially trendy. Articles like this one make me glad.

Photo: Time

Pregcellent: Babymoons. As In Trips, Not Bare Behinds.

Kelly Mills — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 14:33:00 GMT

I'd totally take a media bullet for y'all, and I really feel like I did by watching this Today Show segment on babymoons. "Babymoon" is the cutsie-poo name for the vacay you take with your beloved (or perhaps your spouse) before your progeny springs forth from your loins and you are knee-deep in diapers and sleeplessness and can't imagine even going to the corner store, let alone Maui. The ladies of the Today Show segment are pregnant themselves, so they know! Omigod! It's all just so ah-may-zing and wonderful, and one of the destinations they recommend even gives you a baby bag with bottles and (sound the siren) formula. Let em rip, lactation-pros!

Okay, there were a few good tips on here, I'll admit that. And I'm going to share them so you can choose to watch the clip based on whether or not you can stand the bright perky sunlight of a cracked-out morning show segment anchor. So you should travel in your second trimester when you feel good (I didn't, but maybe you will); avoid long treks (though I bet some of you hiked a continent pregnant and were just fine, thanks); and you can't go on a cruise--well, some cruises will refuse to let you on the boat, so call ahead. Make sure there's a medical facility handy. I'll add my own: Choose a destination with GOOD BATHROOMS. You will thank me for that when you don't have to squat in the road behind a yak three times in one day.

Beyond that the show features a few locales that have pregnancy vacation packages for a pretty penny. One will serve you sparkling apple juice. Live large, ladies.

Kid-Guilt is Keeping You From Having Fun

Karen Murphy — Sat, 03 Nov 2007 15:03:00 GMT

This year I took my very first child-free vacation. Yay me! And it was awesome. What had I been waiting for? But for eleven years before that, I couldn't bear the thought of leaving my kds, leaving them to someone else's care (even their father's), leaving them alone, without me, bereft of love and pancakes and goodnight hugs...

Yeah, well, I'm not alone. Tons of parents stay home from childless vacations and deny themselves a potential good time due to guilt.

In fact, 32% of parents polled recently said that in EIGHTEEN YEARS they had not once taken a vacation away from their kids. Um, hello, could we loosen the apron strings a little here? I'm willing to entertain the notion that those parents maybe couldn't afford a vacation; after all, we all know that kids are an expensive habit to maintain. And maybe some of these folks just lurve their kids so so so much that they wanted them along for every trip. There's that, too. I've enjoyed many a vacation WITH my kids.

But I'm just sayin', sometimes parents need a little non-kid time, you know?

"21 percent of parents would feel guilty the whole time if they left the children behind although fathers would find it easier to go." Well, hello, stereotype! And how about this: "More than a third of men -- 34 percent -- said they wouldn't feel guilty at all at taking a child-free vacation compared to only 16 percent of mothers." What, are we stuck in the 50's? What about it, dads? (I'm sure YOU are the exception).

What about you? Do you vacay with or without the kiddoes, or some of each? Is there guilt involved in staying home? And what would it take to feel good about getting away without them?

A VERY Comprehensive List of Travel Tips

Kelly Mills — Sat, 04 Aug 2007 14:02:00 GMT

My recent plane experience seemed to scare some folks, and I hate to leave things like that. I want you to go on your next trip saying, "Hey, that Strollerderby blogger what's-her-name has got my back." So here's a list of tips for traveling with kids that is about the most comprehensive thing I have ever, ever seen. And did you know some airlines are now charging for pillows? Ugh. Soon we'll be paying a premium for those crappy little tray tables too.

I like the idea of giving your kid a disposable camera--I can just imagine a vacation through my child's eyes. But let me also say that after reading through this, I realize that even a highly organized, chronic overpacker like myself has been missing a few things. Now I feel like my prior trips were the equivalent of taking a three-day camping trip in the wilderness armed only with a penknife and a copy of Walden. Oh, and FYI: no penknives on the plane, folks.

Trend: Families No Longer Taking Vacations

Karen Murphy — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 11:29:00 GMT

When did this start? Actually, I have the answer to that: it's always been that way. I know, because I was in one of the families that never went on vacation. Well, technically, there were three, so that averages out to one every six years. Big whoop. And I had friends whose families went somewhere, every year. Maybe more than once a year!

But it's true, while France packs up and leaves the country empty during the month of August, Americans don't seem to be doing the vacation thing any more. A recent survey by Orbitz revealed that a third of respondents took 5 or fewer vacation days last year, and a third (maybe the same third?) stayed in touch with their office via phone or email while they were away.

It's true, being on vacation with kids is hard. At least, I found it so. After all, you've got to worry about the niceties of little things like naptimes and diapers and weird food preferences that are just barely manageable at home, so what makes you think they'll be any easier when you're on the road? I love to travel, but I found traveling with kids was exhausting, so I can understand why some families are throwing their hands up in the air and giving up. It's easier (not to mention a whole lot cheaper) to just stay home.

Travels With Kids: Abroad Is Better Older

Kelly Mills — Mon, 09 Jul 2007 22:33:00 GMT

Not that I'm bitter that the extent of my summer traveling was a seven-hour van ride to Disneyland: here's a nice piece on the pros and cons of traveling with kids. Most of the folks agreed that for any kind of big-deal, sightseeing vacation, you are better off waiting until the children are old enough to appreciate the adventure. I like these tips from Lonely Planet co-founder Maureen Wheeler. She advises "waiting until kids are 3, 'when they're out of diapers, when they can eat food, when they can talk.' If you're planning once-in-a-lifetime trips, 'then maybe you don't start traveling with your children until the age of 7 to 10.'" Because do you really wanna deal with changing a poopy diaper at the Sistine Chapel?

On the pro side of venturing forth with kids, travel author Pauline Frommer says, "'So what are parents with wanderlust to do? Just stick with the tried and true theme park and cruise vacations, squelching their own desires to see the world? For many, leaving the kids at home over vacation just isn't doable, financially or emotionally.'" I know a few families that have traveled extensively with tiny babies and toddlers, and I will tell you they posses an easy-going, adventurous attitude I will never have. They also do things like eat food from stands on the side of the road and meet locals who invite them to stay in their homes. If you are one of those people, you could probably roam the streets of Nepal with two children under the age of three and be fine. Me, I'm just glad I survived the van ride.

Kids SHOULD Be Bored, and So Should You

Karen Murphy — Mon, 09 Jul 2007 16:09:00 GMT

Recently I took a vacation of my very own. First time without kids. Ever. So there I am with my love, sitting in a tiny condo in Whistler, B.C. We've hiked all the trails, went canoeing on the lake, went bike riding in a light rain. What else is there to do?

Er, besides the obvious, there was...nothing. I found myself looking out the window, just looking at the trees, the view, letting my thoughts simply wander where they may. There was nothing to do, yet at the same time, there was no need TO do anything. It was wonderful! I remember the same thing from childhood, long summer afternoons watching the clouds slowly morph in shapes, watching an ant crawl up a grass blade over and over.

Geek Dads thinks kids should still have days like that. And you, too. Creativity is found through boredom, they say. I agree with that; my time up at Whistler was one of the most creative I've had.

So don't be tempted to try to fill up your kid's days. Let them be bored; they'll soon enough find something to do, and if it doesn't involve setting the cat on fire or shaving each others' heads, why not let them? (actually, the head-shaving thing would be okay)

Oh, and this also absolves you of any obligation whatsoever to entertain your kids. If you needed permission, that is. So go stare out the window awhile; I promise it'll do you some good!

Taking Your Kids' Friends On Vacay Spells a Better Trip For You

Karen Murphy — Fri, 06 Jul 2007 18:07:00 GMT

Nah, not instead of your own kids. Though I thought of that. I mean in addition to yours. Yes, I am totally freaking serious! Think about it: wouldn't it be great to take the edge off somehow, take the pressure away from 24/7 dealing with your own ~~spoiled and whiny~~ lovely kids? After all, this is all about you: whatever makes your trip easier has got to make it better for everyone, right?

Enter the new trend in packing a friend. Actually, this is nothing new, but it makes so much sense. And if I didn't have three kids at home already, I would try it. But, my three plus a kid each for them, equals way, way too many kids. There's a few things to keep in mind, though, starting with making sure everybody's clear on who pays for what. According to the New York Times, which you would figure would know about such things, "The general etiquette seems to be that the guest’s family provides air fare and spending money." Okay, that works for me. Which means I'm paying for food and board and, uh, what else?

Another potential pitfall is obviously if there are behavioral or discipline problems, either with your kids or with the guests. But I find that kids generally behave better when there's other people around, so as long as you don't invite this girl you're probably okay.

I'm thinking, though, that the real trick here would be to find families who wanted your kids. Mine are available. Anyone?