Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

krugle — Mon, 12 Jan 2009 10:29:46 GMT

they obviously didnt report him cause if they did they would have lost government funding that they were getting for supporting them i mean there in a trailer and now they have one less mouth to feed it makes sense to me im not justifying what they did obviously it was wrong and there not good people but this kinda thing happens all the time

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

Lila — Sun, 11 Jan 2009 01:06:57 GMT

I about guarantee that the Herrman's know where Adam's is. dead or alive. come on 10 yrs to report him??? if it was my child adoptive or not I would have reported it even if they were a problem child or not. come on I had a problem child and when she would take off I would immediantly call the police for help. I didn't wait no 10 yrs. by the way I am now raising her son. I hope they get the answer to where he is at real soon not another 10 yrs down the road.

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

shyteema — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 02:01:50 GMT

i can't believe these stupid,dumb and retarted people would wait for a freakin decade just to tell or report... I SWEAR TO GOD= IF THAT BOY IS DEAD... YALL WILL BE DEAD TOO. AND YALL BETTER FIND HIM TOO...IM NO WHERE NEAR TO PLAYING EITHER......... IM DEAD SERIOUS

BLESS YOUR HEART KIID

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

seattle slough — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 01:01:35 GMT

10 years.

I'm not a parent - is that a long time?

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

Lula — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 18:29:55 GMT

No Chartreuse, the adoptive parents in this case were heterosexuals. Kinda makes you think we should ban heterosexuals from adopting, doesn't it? ;)

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

Lifeinthebend — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 18:24:18 GMT

Thanks for clarifying Jeanne Sager. I suspected that's what you meant, but took issue with how it was phrased in your concluding paragraph. Clearly, these two people did not deserve to be parents of anyone.

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

chartreuse — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 15:42:42 GMT

the adoptive parents were obviously gay, right?

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

JeanneSager — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 15:41:57 GMT

Life in the bend: I assure you I wasn't bashing adoptive parents. My point was that once parents adopt a child, I hate people using the word "adoptive parent" because what does it matter if a child was adopted or not, parents are parents! I have a high amount of respect for parents who adopt, and I take issue with anyone who doesn't give them the full credit they deserve.

But, in this case, I wouldn't call the Herrmans real parents - adoptive or otherwise. If they can't bother to report their young son missing for a decade, they're hardly parent material.

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

lifeinthebend — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 15:35:43 GMT

Wait, am I reading correctly that you use the term "adoptive parents" because you don't want to call them "parents"? As a parent whose children came into the family through adoption, I'm pretty darn insulted by that.

This case is horrifying, but let's not use it to run-down adoptive parents again.

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

Anon — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 07:16:09 GMT

This child's adoptive parents thought he was with his biological parents or HOMELESS! If they thought he returned to his parents all it would've taken to verify it was a simple phone call and if they thought he was homeless they should have called authorities he was 11 not 16.

Yea I bet the adoptive parents feel 'very guilty' about not reporting this child missing. The only reason you don't report a child missing is when you know exactly where the child is. The adoptive parents know where this poor kid is they already have an attorney - tells me what I need to know. These people are disgusting, unfit and deserve a long prison sentence.

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

Lula — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 16:15:44 GMT

It's true that adoptive parents are no different than biological parents in their ability to fail at parenthood. Passing a homestudy isn't that hard (I say from experience), and being state-approved for parenting doesn't really mean beans in the long run. I'm all for busting the myth that adoptive parents are somehow more perfect or prepared than other parents simply because they want to adoption and are cleared for an adoption. That pedestal is both undeserved and a giant PITA for those who are placed upon it.

But this case? It doesn't matter to me whether this child was adopted or being raised by his natural parents. Not only did this kid's parents fail him eight ways from Sunday, but something's also very wrong here at the community level if a child can disappear for 10 years without anyone around being able to pinpoint the last time they saw him. Did no one notice the kid wasn't attending school? Does the Kansas Department of Child Welfare (by whatever name) not perform follow-up on former foster children who have been placed with adoptive families? What's up with that?

Very disturbing story all the way around. Poor kid. I hope he's found soon, preferably alive and healthy.

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

leahsmom — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 14:21:08 GMT

The parents absolutely should have called and reported him. I can't tell from the story whether they seriously need help and shouldn't be raising children or whether they would benefit from punishment.

It does make me think of something else, too. I have lived with a family where a child repeatedly ran away. It's extremely difficult to stop a kid who is determined to do that - and there are thousands of children in this country who do. After all, kids are people too, and especially once they get to a certain age, short of physically restraining them 24-7, you just can't keep them from doing it. It's utterly heartbreaking and even backbreaking to deal with it. I wonder if there are any resources out there for parents who face that - does anyone know?

re: Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

Trace — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 09:16:10 GMT

Sad part is had someone not reported them, because they were concerned about Adam, nothing would have been done at all yet. Other family members should have stepped up! And the adoptive parents thought he went back to his biological parents? Hello, apparently in order to be adoptive parents, you don't need brain cells either... I mean we all knew that some biological parents are dumber than a box of rocks, but apparently, adoptive parents come in all intelligence levels as well! Poor kid, with adoptive parents like that, I'd rather disapear from existance too! That's just crazy!