feedback for "Parental Advisory: Gender Bender"

1. outstanding reply!
   

   posted by : paulahess on 9/26/2007 at 2:35 PM Flag For Abuse

2. If you're child is being mistaken for the other gender, do you really think it's a good idea to keep his hair long so you can make some sort of "statement" about how "alernative" and "hip" you are that you don't need scissors? Let's use some common sense. I remember being teased at age four. Don't subject your kid to it needlessly.

   posted by : bboston88 on 9/26/2007 at 2:57 PM Flag For Abuse

3. My son was also sometimes mistaken for a girl at age 3 because of his longish, blonde curly hair.  (He HATED getting it cut and I hated struggling over it, so we just didn't do it too often.)  He was never teased about it at school, even though most of the boys at his school are African-American and keep their hair very short.  It's not a "taboo" like it once was.  My son decided on his own at age 5 that he wanted short hair and would sit still for the haircut, so we did it.  He actually was more embarassed by the big fuss everyone made over the new do than he ever was over the mistaken identity. 

   posted by : avimom on 9/26/2007 at 3:19 PM Flag For Abuse

4. This is one of the best replies to this situation I could imagine someone coming up with. Great job! (I am not surprised, as I loved your book--gave it a great review in a mag, in fact.)
   

   posted by : hanabel on 9/26/2007 at 4:39 PM Flag For Abuse

5. bboston88, if you read the question, you'll see that it says that the son doesn't want it cut. It's the parent who wants to cut it. It feels like you're projecting your own issues onto this situation.
   
   My brother is 7 and has had long hair by his own choice since he was 3. Like the child quoted in the response, he's said that if his gender were questioned, he would just say "I'm not a girl, I'm a boy with long hair." This has never come up for him, though. He's never been teased about it and he loves wearing it in a ponytail. (Oddly enough, all his male role models have short hair.)
   
   I totally 100% agree with the response written.
   
   

   posted by : hamsterkid on 9/26/2007 at 7:51 PM Flag For Abuse

6. I love the response. However, my daughter has a little friend, 2, whose long, blonde curls always get him mistaken for a girl, and I find it annoying, because it seems like it's his parents who want to keep the hair, and I'm annoyed at myself for finding it annoying. I mean, who cares? It's easy to get judgmental.
   

   posted by : maiaoming on 10/4/2007 at 10:41 M Flag For Abuse

7. I guess it all depends on what image you want him and your family to project. I personally do not support caucasion men with long hair, American Indians, Polynisians, and others where their hair is truly part of their heritage is one thing, but caucasion men with long hair project a lower class of people, and I would not want my son to be thought of as a girl, or of a low class nature, nor of some "hippy" or alternative type family. In my opinion, everyone in the family projects the values of that family, until they are of age to project their own values, so yes, it is a family thought process, children dont have carte blanche on what they want, until they are old enough to afford their own lifestyle. If his long hair is making you uncomfortable, then insist he cut it. Its that simple. If your trying to project the image of any of the things I mentioned above, or if you care not if that is what is projected, then leave it long. I really think people try and make thing more difficult then they are, and I also believe that people in the name of PC try to ignore the fact that particular things ie...long hair on men, project particular images. If your comfortable with that image then keep it, if your not, then dont.

   posted by : CS on 3/3/2008 at 2:40 PM Flag For Abuse

8. CS, I see your point, but... ICK, on how you presented it.

   posted by : anom on 8/7/2008 at 11:51 M Flag For Abuse