-
I remember the day my mom told me I couldn't go outside without a shirt on anymore. I was 7, and heartbroken. While my little brother enjoyed running around shirtless, I had to suffer from the heat! I'm not really concerned about my 3-year-old being naked (as long as I'm around, of course, who would leave their child alone in the presence of a would-be pedophile anyway??). So where do I draw the line? No naked in the sandbox - I can't imagine sand in certain places can feel anything but icky!!
posted by : jeanne on 9/4/2008 at 11:22 AM Flag For Abuse
-
I'm sorry, but if she's not really toilet trained yet, I don't think she should be running around naked outside. I know that kids pools and other public areas are full of germs that can seep out anyway, but at least diapers and clothes provide a barrier. I see nothing wrong with letting her run around naked at home or in your back yard, or other less public places. That should be enough to accomplish your goals of body acceptance.
Also, you may not see them, but there are a lot of sick people out there.
posted by : lilmissyny on 9/4/2008 at 12:49 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Funny piece. My two girls go naked all the time around the house. In fact, they strip off their clothes, run up to me and say in their best super-hero voice: "Nakie-GIRL!" Pretty hilarious. Now that the oldest one is 5, though, I've toned down on letting her go outside naked. "Just on the upper deck," I'll tell her.
When they were very small I would take them to public wading pools with just a cloth swim diaper on them that didn't cover their chests. To me, it just seems a bit perverse to see a bikini top on a one-year-old--there's nothing THERE to hide! By the time they were two, I succumbed to the tankini for them.
Now they're understandably sad when they see boys strip off their shirts on the playground on a hot day and I tell them it's not a good idea for them to do the same. Not because of pedophiles but so they can learn our cultural norms. In our world, that means we can go naked at home and on our deck, but nowhere else.
I imagine most people, including myself, are alarmed at child nudity at a public play area/fountain/pool since toileting accidents are a real possibility, as the author mentioned.
posted by : j bird on 9/4/2008 at 1:07 PM Flag For Abuse
-
"Sick people" don't care if your child is fully dressed or naked. We're all vulnerable, unfortunately.
My daughter always has to style herself with matching outfit, shoes, bows, etc.--she hates being naked. But if she liked it, I would let her run around clothes-free. I was a little nudist, myself.
She's a baby...it isn't sexual. It is up to you and your daughter how much clothing she wears at that age.
posted by : CaliMama on 9/4/2008 at 6:04 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I think my biggest worry would be her getting infections from others who may feel the same way. Let's say another naked kid who's "almost potty trained" sits on a swing and doesn't leave it as clean as it should be - then your little girl goes and sits on the same swing. That could be risking a horrible urinary tract infection :( In my personal opinion, the risk is not worth the reward. But we all have our opinions :)
As for the sexual predator issue: Yes, that's a big one. I've seen surveillance video of toddlers being fondled through their clothing in department stores when mom turns her head or walks no more than 2 feet away. If the child is nude and a predator gets that close.. it just makes me shudder :( My uncle is a pedophile, I'm ashamed to say. I would never allow my children around him without me there to watch every move. He's your average, normal-looking mid-40s white male. To see him at a park around children wouldn't seem out of place what-so-ever... until you realized he was there and childless or he said/did something out of the way.
I totally agree with letting the little tots run around the house/private yard in the buff. My kids did it, I did it and I'm sure generations before me did it. But I'm 100% for having their little privates covered in public areas. Even if it's just little underwear or, like the blogger said, a onesie. I absolutely agree that "dressed" can be a onesie :)
posted by : MicheleW1974 on 9/4/2008 at 6:24 PM Flag For Abuse
-
My husband and his sister grew up in South Africa. If you look at their baby pictures, they are buck naked... until the ones documenting their post-immigration Canadian summers.
Oddly, nudity has been a fantastic potty training incentive for my 2-year-old daughter. She says, "I wanna be a nudie!" all the time. I tell her that she can be fully nude indoors as soon as she uses the potty regularly. She's really trying hard to earn her indoor nudity!
posted by : edamommy on 9/4/2008 at 7:34 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I think you should be more concerned with calling her CLEMENTINE. Let me guess, her middle name is MAGNOLIA.
posted by : stupidnamesupportgroup on 9/4/2008 at 8:18 PM Flag For Abuse
-
There IS some research to back up your hunch about positive self-image:
http://academicnaturist.blogspot.com/2007/07/what-about-children.html
posted by : AcademicNaturist on 9/4/2008 at 9:14 PM Flag For Abuse
-
My 2 1/2 year old daughter is the same way. She strips if there is a sprinkle of water on her hem. Oddly enough, she loves the process of picking out clothes and dressing herself. She puts on various articles of clothes several times a day, only to take them right back off whenever the mood to be naked strikes. She even has an "I'm Neeekid" song and dance. Outside, where opportunities to get a smudge on oneself or a drip of water are everywhere, she is always naked. We live very rural, so I've never even given it much thought. The kitchen sink and the sprayer cleans her bottom after she's been in the sandbox just fine. Toddlers are always putting their hands on everything, probably in their pants at times too, spreading germs with their grubby mitts. Clothed or naked they are germ spreaders.
posted by : borntobebare on 9/4/2008 at 9:27 PM Flag For Abuse
-
there's an article in the most recent Psychology Today about how important filth and germs are for our health-- and it goes into the theory that cleanliness is the reason for increased allergies and asthma. and it includes a great line about how basically the earth is covered with a film of "fecal matter" or something along those lines. anyway, i'm not saying we should all bathe in it. but a kid who takes an accidental poop on the concrete near the pool or playground (and it's cleaned up) isn't going to spread anything too horrible. the streets of nyc are covered in more than just a film of dog shit and my kids (who touch the sidewalks with appalling regularity (and then eat with their hands)) are in fantastic health. my son potty trained by being naked for a week in the summer- we were in australia where being nude at age 2 is considered totally normal and beautiful.
posted by : alittlepoop on 9/4/2008 at 10:16 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I loved your article and I think you made many great points!
I have raised my 2 sons as "nudists" thus far. We actually frequent nudists resorts for about 90% of our outings and vacations (and no it is not a "hippy" thing, we have many many government officials state judges, doctors, teachers, etc.). I would highly recommend it to anyone. My 10 year old son has already showed maturity in his body acceptance: being more comfortable with puberty, not having an unhealthy curiosity for girls'/womens' bodies, ect. You would be amazed at all the research that supports this.
Here are some great tips and info. that I found online:
Encourage family nudity without being abnormal. Children have not yet acquired a sophisticated understanding of modesty, and really don't care who sees them naked. This is the time when the parent can mold their conscience without making them self-conscious of nakedness. This, in turn, will help children associate nakedness to routine activity instead of exclusively naughty activity, helping illicit forms of nakedness to lose their appeal later in life.
Start allowing/encouraging family nudity during potty training & continue through the school age years and beyond. You'd be surprised how quickly potty training takes root when your toddler/preschooler is allowed to go bare at home, but...be prepared for occasional "accidents" as well, and handle these situations calmly without anger or revulsion.
Going nude for extended periods in the summer can save lots of money on home air conditioning bills! And if energy costs are not a primary concern, keep your home warm & comfortable during cold weather.
A focal point for nudity that enables the whole family to participate together is very helpful. An indoor swimming pool is ideal, but not practical for most families. Saunas are also excellent for this, but are not as common in the U.S. as Europe. Other water related ideas could be an outdoor pool below or above ground. A cheaper yet more practical idea that works year round would be a hot tub. Children see this as a heated kiddie swimming pool they can use water toys in too.
Allow your children - from birth - to see you in ordinary nude situations (e.g.- dressing, bathing or showering, using the toilet) or any activity where nudity is a natural part. By being comfortable with your own body you will naturally convey the message to your children that nudity really is okay and not something to fear. There are naturally times in life when clothes must be worn for protection, for comfort, and to adhere to societal norms. However, by talking with your children about being comfortable with nudity at home, your children will grow up understanding that being nude & being seen nude at home isn't something "uncool, horrible, and utterly embarrassing."
As they begin to recognize differences between themselves and you or your spouse, explain to them the reason for these differences. Suggested explanations are: "Mommy's breasts are for giving milk to babies like when you were small"? or "Mommy and daddy have hair down here because our bodies are warmer, and it helps keep our bodies cooler (by retaining sweat)."
posted by : naturally on 9/4/2008 at 10:28 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I don't think wearing a diaper at a pool or public place is any more sanitary than going naked. On our vacation last year a mom pulled her child from the pool as he was having explosive diarrhea. She ran for their condo, but a trail of poop was left behind. It was cleaned up of course, but accidents happen whether the child is clothed or not. My one year old is in the habit of sticking his finger in his butt. He can do this clothed or not. It's just poop. It won't hurt you unless you ingest a large amount.
posted by : Its Just Poop on 9/5/2008 at 12:06 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Great, hysterical article! We're also trying very hard to raise our daughter (15 months going on 15) with a healthy body image. One huge obstacle is our American society's "crabs in a barrel" mentality. If one person acts in a way outside the bounds of acceptable behavior, others are quick to step in and admonish the bad mommy for letting a 2 year old enjoy some innocent clotheless time. Teaching Clementine to ignore the rude glares coming from grownups because she feels good about herself will unfornately make the process of creating a strong, self-assured daughter that much more difficult.
Cynthia
posted by : Kern in New Jersey on 9/5/2008 at 12:07 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Thank you for this. I'm fond of running around naked, or half naked with my daughter during these hot days. We moved from New York to the "woods" of New Jersey, and there's nothing more than wearing a tank top and some underpants and sitting in the grass while she runs around butt naked. Hell, this morning we took a naked swim (thanks to my husband leaving the heater on the pool on all night...) it was wonderful.
Nakedness is natural, and it feels good. Talk of germs, perverts, sexuality...give me a break. There's nothing wrong with a body, whether it's the non sexual, slightly chubby body of a toddler, or the sexual beautiful body of a woman. I'll get undressed where I want! And I commend you for this article.
posted by : traceasaurus on 9/5/2008 at 1:01 PM Flag For Abuse
-
funny_ my 2 3/4 y.o. son also LOVES to be naked and also sings about it "naakkeeddd booooyyy! oh boy, naaakkeeddd". i've loved hearing that song all summer long. and i', a bit jealous of that freedom. the potty thing does scare me a bit- he's peed on the bathroom floor less than a foot away from the potty. i like the idea of using (at home) nudity as a reward for potty training. i think its obnoxious for folks to place their warped morals on my little kids naked butt! but, at the same time, safety is crucial. i've never seen, or even heard of those dept store videos- thanks for something else to be afraid of. so, i'm sorta torn on the issue. oh, and Clementine is an adorable (not 'stupid') name.
posted by : lilacskin on 9/5/2008 at 1:12 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I have a slightly different perspective: I grew up in a country where people didn't care much about kid nakedness. As a result, it was not unusual to see 5 or even 7 year olds buck-naked at the beach. Not because that's what the kid preferred, but because the parents didn't think that a 5 year old needed any type of bathing suit. I have nightmares about it to this day. I absolutely hated it. I don't mind my kid running around naked, and I run around naked in the house often, but I always had a swimsuit for her ready (and so far, that is what she prefers). I also think that a diaper in any public pool-type area is not an unreasonable request.
posted by : IMK on 9/5/2008 at 1:59 PM Flag For Abuse
-
It looks like I'm in the minority here, but I'm not a big fan of public nudity.. but not for modesty. I actually think it's not "just poop." You can get pretty sick from other people's poop.. that's why you wash your hands after you go to the bathroom. I'm fine with naked in the yard or around the house, but i think at least a diaper or undies are in order in public.
I had an experience a couple of years ago where I went to a potluck party. There was a 2 year old boy running around with no pants. I didn't think it was THAT big of a deal except that he was constantly playing with his penis, sitting in the swing, and going to the dinner table with no pants. It's not naughty, it's just unsanitary! I never saw them wash his hands after all his penis play.
I also don't mind if my friends let their toddlers run naked in my yard, but if there are snacks, they need to wash their hands and put on pants! If they are riding my kid's tricycle, they need pants too...
I also worry about the pervs in public. I'm sorry, I have had too many experiences with pedophiles throughout my life.. don't want to encourage them at ALL~ (I know they don't really need encouragement, but hey)
Anyway, I guess I fall somewhere in the middle on the issue... Interesting article though. I'd say I probably wouldn't give you dirty looks if your daughter was playing naked in the sprinkler, but I would be grossed out if she decided to get on the swing!!
posted by : tiffer on 9/5/2008 at 3:29 PM Flag For Abuse
-
You could make all kinds of scientific arguments for it (sunlight is a disinfectant!) but basically being naked is fun and kids should get to do it some places. (Not in restaurants, say, or church). Also, Clementine is a really pretty name. Sometimes I think Babble has appointed an official troll.
posted by : catmom on 9/5/2008 at 6:36 PM Flag For Abuse
-
My 5 yr old son is a nudist around the house. We have had to teach him some "naked privacy" out of respect for visitors who don't necessarily appreciate seeing a toddler penis flashing around. Those without children don't necessarily have the same appreciation for the sweet innocence of a naked child. Age 4-1/2 was his last public nudity as we were on a small, fairly secluded Hawaiian beach and didn't want his shorts and t shirt wet and muddy for the car ride home in a rental car. I was conscious that my confort with the situation was not necessarily the same as others on the beach and out of respect for others got him dressed after 15 or 20 minutes.
So while I love child nakedness as much as the next person, I have to warn (?) you that a pre-teen neighbor had "inappropriate contact" with our son, and I have to wonder if the nudist behavior in the household may have contributed. Our son is fine and the neighbor no longer allowed any significant contact, but the potential for serious harm was very much there, and thankfully our son told us about the incident right away so we could deal with it. So please just be aware, that the potential danger is not just with strangers, and could be as close as your own dear friends and family.
posted by : NakedWithCare on 9/5/2008 at 8:45 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Thank you for this piece. I had my first public shaming for baby nudity a few weeks ago and have been fuming ever since. I find it profoundly creepy that Americans insist that babies be clothed. It reveals just how much we sexualize our children that we find their naked bodies provocative (even at 11 months)! I will not let the potential gaze of an imagined predator keep my son from loving his body and enjoying the full sensuality of his perfect naked self.
posted by : Kittsono on 9/5/2008 at 9:57 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I think it really depends on the situation. We have friends who raised naked children. Wherever they were—parties, BBQs, the grocery store—their daughters stripped down. I didn't think much of it until all of the kids were at a last-day of the year party for kindergarten. The party was at the beach. When our friends' daughter took off her clothes, I felt totally uncomfortable. Maybe I'm a prude, but this just felt like the wrong place. 22 other kids were fully dressed, wading, playing in the sand. And one six year old was running around stark naked.
I would never say something to another parent about how they choose to raise their kids—but honestly, this felt like a psychology test.
posted by : here and there on 9/6/2008 at 10:14 AM Flag For Abuse
-
It's funny, all debating and morality aside, I just fear sun damage too much to let my little man be naked outside for too long!
That said, I'm not morally offended by a naked child at all. But yes, potty accidents would concern me, and I wouldn't want to see the naked butt on a public swing.
posted by : EG on 9/8/2008 at 8:07 PM Flag For Abuse
-
"I have this idea that the more I let her be naked now, the more accepting of her body she will be later. I don't know that any studies would back me up."
There are certainly some. The evidence is that kids who are okay with nudity grow up better adjusted socially in a variety of areas. Anecdotally, I can also refer you to people who are living examples of it.
Those objecting to you are the ones with the problem. At the least they lack considerable understanding; others are foisting their body phobia onto you. Please continue to resist it and them everywhere you can.
The sanitary issue is the only one I'd validate. The idea that kids are in greater danger of crime because they're naked sounds plausible --- but is dead wrong. Do clothes protect children? Not at all. And anyone who thinks a naked toddler is in greater danger is invited to prove it. Pay no attention to the fear-mongers who think pedophilia operates in a way that it simply doesn't.
You want to make kids ashamed of their bodies, anxious, even afraid? Those who have those problems are LEAST likely to report real abuse. The bodyphobes are turning an entire country into MORE fertile ground for sex criminals.
It's no accident that the most sex-crazed country in the western world and the one with the most sex crimes against women is the one that thinks nudity is a sin in nearly every circumstance.
posted by : Paul Rapoport on 9/8/2008 at 10:24 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I don't think that insisting that some things, like nudity, are appropriate in certain places and not appropriate in other places is tantamount to encouraging hatred of one's body or sexualizing children. Maybe all the people at the park or the beach or whatever don't want to see your kid naked. And since they're in public, they shouldn't have to. I think it's a little rude to foist nudity upon people who didn't sign up for it. Not just because of sanitary issues, although I think that's important, too. I think that it's a mistake to teach your kids to ignore rules that they think are silly or to always put their own comfort before that of others. Especially in a public place where they have to coexist with other people.
It's great that you're encouraging your children to be comfortable with their bodies, but you shouldn't use innocent bystanders, so to speak, as tools in that lesson.
posted by : Ahem on 9/9/2008 at 11:26 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Yeah... I encourage my kids to wear clothes, even in the house. We're just not a nudist household, I guess. My kids share a room and I've caught them playing around in one of their beds naked a couple times and I tell them that they have to put underwear on and being naked is just for taking a bath or changing clothes. Maybe my kids are going to grow up and have body image issues... but I doubt it. We all change in front of each other and occasionally the kids will shower with me, but as far as actually running around the house naked - no.
Our old neighbors let their 4 year old daughter run around naked a lot. We would go over to their house and she would just be sitting on the couch, naked. It didn't "offend" me or anything, but I'm just not into it. And I was a little grossed out to sit on their couch, to be perfectly honest.
posted by : NoBirthdaySuitsHere on 9/10/2008 at 11:51 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I'm fairly lax about the clothing issue, and see no problem with a baby in a diaper when s/he's running around the yard or even a park. I probably wouldn't even glance twice upon seeing a topless toddler at the grocery store.
However, letting her go in public w/o a diaper is unsanitary, and it would make me pissed if my kid were playing in the same area. We all think our kids bodies are darling, and they really are, but keep it in the home. The general public shouldn't have to be forced to witness all their intimate parts.
Get over your entitlement, have some respect for the rest of the folks ...and for your daughter.
It's just not that cute.
posted by : evol on 9/11/2008 at 5:55 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Wow, as a mother-to-be who is due any day now, I find this article very interesting. The comments on this panel are not really negative about this subject either. Sure there are a lot of pedophiles out there, but I have a Concealed Handgun License for a reason! Anyway, small children don't know about the boundaries of modesty in America. It is up to the parents to teach children that their bodies are not gross and that they should feel comfortable about themselves, especially the girls since they tend to be more sensitive.
If I have company over my house, I would just explain to my child if they are between the ages of 3-6 that there is a time and a place. Also I would enforce this rule even more if they are not potty trained. As for public playgrounds, I'm skeptical about even letting them play there even if they are wearing clothes, let alone being naked and doing it. I would just explain that they have to put on extra clothes because the nasty germs would get on them! As kids get older, they need to realize the boudaries of being in their birthday suit because not everyone would want to see their privates.
posted by : cleoc on 9/19/2008 at 6:19 PM Flag For Abuse
-
In Italy girls didn't have to wear bikini tops till they started growing boobs and even then you saw women tanning their boobies. I didn't care if I was nude I just didn't have the patience to be clothed. However I am also a different story I am one of those rare Italian gingers so needed more protection from the medditeranean sun. I think though there should be structure to when you can be nudie or clothed. It would be great if besides the sun problem we could be all nudists however just imagine large disgusting cities all of a sudden going nude. I would have to be careful where I sit to not get sexually transmitted deseases among other things sometimes we need clothing.
posted by : Italian Gingernut on 9/21/2008 at 11:36 AM Flag For Abuse
-
Is it necessary to keep the daughter naked to give her selfconfidence about her body? Parents who dress their children destroy selfconfidence? That feels strange to me. Children are innocent and I know they love to run without clothes but why must people around be a part of this? Why can´t you have nakey time at home? I agree with earlier feedback saying " get over your entitlement" as there are other people who don´t love to set around naked penises or vaginas whether there are children or adults. And we who think so are not perverted or abnormal. We don´t have to use words like that whatever we are. This is not about that, as far as I think, it is more about respecting each other and so far, nudity is private and in public areas, we are dressed.
posted by : Babygirl on 9/28/2008 at 4:07 PM Flag For Abuse
-
What I want to know is why was it deemed necessary to make fun of this author's baby's name? What a jerk. Clementine is an awesome name and you making fun of it was a waste of a comment.
posted by : stupidcommentsupportgroup on 5/26/2009 at 2:46 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I personally have no problem with young children being naked. I certainly spent enough time as a small child going around entirely or partially naked, especially around my house and neighborhood. I went shirtless around my house and yard in the summer until I was about ten.
In my opinion, it boils down to this: It's nice not having to wear clothes, especially in the summer, or when you want to play in a sprinkler or go for a swim, and we're not going to have much opportunity to wander naked as adults. Let the kids have fun.
posted by : jackygirl on 6/5/2009 at 5:17 PM Flag For Abuse
