-
Excellent article! Statistics point to the fact that American children lag behind industialised countries in all academic areas despite record spending. It is time to put our priorities in order: Academics FIRST.
posted by : A Dagher on 9/8/2008 at 1:10 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Great article. I grew-up in one of those overwhelmingly-white, upper-middle class Texas suburbs, so I know exactly what you're talking about.
PS - Even the "really great schools" in Texas aren't that good.
posted by : Seriously on 9/8/2008 at 1:24 PM Flag For Abuse
-
My son turned one Aug. 15 and keeps up with kids six months older than him. But I'm already getting the hold him back hard press from his football-obsessed grandmother. His grandfather played pro, father played college--she held him back, too.
I'm not caving. That shit is ridiculous.
posted by : ms on 9/8/2008 at 1:31 PM Flag For Abuse
-
If summer babies are behind in Texas us NY kids must be a mess! After all, the cut-off birthday for kindergarten attendance here is December 1. It's been December 1 for as long as I can remember - which is why I (a summer baby) went to school a full year before my cousin (a December baby). We both went to all-day kindergarten five days a week, and we both turned out normal (OK - semi-normal, but I think that has more to do with the genes and less to do with some arbitrary birthday cutoff!)
posted by : jeanne on 9/8/2008 at 1:40 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I have a girl with a May birthday and am amazed that so many of her preschool boy friends--developmentally and socially at the same level as my daughter--are being held back a year. Crazy! I feel bad for these kids, having to do a third preschool year when they're truly ready to learn in kindergarten.
Plus, this means that my very petite, 5-year-old daughter will be even that much smaller than her 6 to 6 1/2 year old male classmates.
I was always the youngest in school, having a December birthday, starting school in a state with a Dec 31 cutoff and then moving to a state with a Aug 31st cutoff. So I didn't turn 18 until halfway through my freshman year in college. Yeah, I got more mileage on my fake ID than my older peers did, but I kept up with them just fine academically.
Why are American parents so obsessed that their kid has to be the best--ahead of the pack--in physical size and maturity?! Grrrr.....
posted by : Dec kid on 9/8/2008 at 2:23 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Wow. Seriously must be well-versed on all public schools in Texas to make that assumption. Texas does have some of the best public schools in the country...and that isn't based on the TAKS test. There are great schools in Texas and there are terrible ones...pretty consistent with the rest of the US. Not all white, upper-class schools are better...they just have better drugs.
My guy is an August 25th birthday, so I'm feeling you on this. There was an article on Slate recently about the implications of older kindergarten: http://www.slate.com/id/2196423/ It's worth a read if you haven't seen it yet.
I think your decision to find a public school that fits your child is spot on. Good luck! I'm sure he'll do fabulous!
posted by : BabbleReader on 9/8/2008 at 2:26 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Phtttttt
I held one of my daughters (have 2) and my son. Best thing we ever did. She is much older now, so we can more easily tell the benefits. Self-confident, funny and smart - best thing we ever did.
You are wrong to assume it is 'all good' if you dont do this.
posted by : larry on 9/8/2008 at 2:27 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Hey, what about those of us with daughters in these classes? There will be all these boys who can drive in their class when they are 15. Ahhhhh!!!!
Amy
www.sofiabean.com
posted by : AmyE on 9/8/2008 at 2:35 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I can't believe what I am reading here! Good for you for sticking to your guns and standing your ground (that sounds very Texan ha ha).
I am lucky I have a June girl who happens to be huge anyway, but if I was in your position, I'd have done the exact same thing!
posted by : bigbabymama on 9/8/2008 at 2:37 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I actually am in the same boat as you, and despite having no external pressure to "red shirt" my son, I decided to wait. We're in CA and the cut-off is Dec. 2, and my son was born Nov. 27. Academically, he meets the minimum requirements, but he doesn't do well in large groups (where large group is defined by > 5 kids). He shuts down, doesn't participate, doesn't play with other kids, and most importantly, refuses to communicate what is bothering him.
I'm sure it's possible that being a year older won't help things, but both my husband and I really feel like having another year in an intimate environment in his preschool focused on student-led learning will help him grow his self-confidence. Since we also realize that today's kindergarten is ultra-competitive and pro-assimilation, why not give our son another year to be "just a kid," right?
posted by : julie00 on 9/8/2008 at 2:52 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Something Texas really has going for it is awesome homeschool freedoms.
Three of my 4 boys have summer birthdays-- the eldest two are September birthdays, after the cut-off. I homeschooled them until 7th and 9th grades, and then started them in a public charter school-- the youngest in their classes. Not only the youngest, but small for their age. They both excel. The oldest is on the football team. He'll be a Junior at age 16. He'll graduate at age 17. He'll start college before he turns 18. (Well, with Texas Early Start opportunities, he'll start college at 15.)
My 3rd son has a January birthday, and he was the one not ready for school.... until he was 9. But from age 8-and-10-months to 9-and-3-months he progressed from a 1st grade level in reading and math to 3rd grade, square on. By the time he was 11, he was on a 6th grade level in math and 8th grade in reading. I'm still homeschooling him- the school would have held him back.
My 4th son just turned 7. I considered holding him back when he was 5... we were homeschooling still, so the only thing grade level mattered for was his Bible club at church. I went ahead and placed him in the K class, the youngest for sure... and he ended up winning the award at the end of the year "Outstanding Clubber." He was the first to finish his handbook, and the only kid who finished the extra credit workbook.
And girls... I do assume it's all about sports when the girls aren't equally scrutinized.
It's like politics- everyone claims they are for Equal Rights until a woman is in politics, and suddenly "how can she do the job and be a mother at the same time" comes out-- even by the feminists and liberals. What a shame. At least homeschooling, I can teach my children free of prejudice.
posted by : homeschooler on 9/8/2008 at 3:08 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Another interesting article here: http://www.slate.com/id/2196423/
It's a spiral. Parents who game the system are forcing even parents who don't WANT to game the system feel like the HAVE to game the system just to level the playing field.
Don't buy into it. Kids should only be held back if they are socially or academically delayed. Actually delayed to the point of not being able to cope with their age-appropriate grade.
posted by : k1 on 9/8/2008 at 3:22 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Wow, that is nuts. I could see if the child wasn't smart enough or developmentally delayed but geshh.
My son starts kindergarten next Aug he will have just turned 5 a month prior. My daughter will be the same when she turns 5 she'll have just turned 5 20 days before the start of school. I started Kindergarten at 4 and I had a Nov birthday. I excelled through school and much to my brothers dismay shared some classes with him because I advanced faster. He was 1 grade ahead.
I think if your child is ready then only you know that not a teacher or principal that is afraid your child may act to immature. What hog wash. My son speaks and acts better then most kids 1-2 years older then him. He is already at the 1st grade level of requirements to start the first grade other then being "old enough". Putting an age on learning readiness is a shame.
I have already applied for open enrollment for my son (schools in our neighborhood are highly competitive) No one has said anything about red shirting. I hope I am not confronted with this issue I would be floored.
posted by : carlie on 9/8/2008 at 3:33 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Let's not forget we're talking about Texas here...leading the nation in being almost - if not at - the bottom of most rankings of social and cultural metrics. Not the most progressive or impressive state (of course if you ask a Texan they will ridiculously dispute this.) Enroll your child when you and he think he's ready, period.
posted by : mrb on 9/8/2008 at 4:25 PM Flag For Abuse
-
actually having a winter baby in some states (NY for example) is just as "bad," and red-shirting is supposedly not allowed in public schools. think about having a december 31st baby who starts kindergarten at 4 but doesnt turn 5 until almost 1/2 way through the school year. or worse, if that child goes to public pre-k, they will be in full time elementary school at age 3!
as long as everyone sticks with the schedule, kids will only be 12 months apart (max) and there will be some sort of fairness in the system.
posted by : stick with the program on 9/8/2008 at 4:29 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I think the author is right on and salute her for not giving in. The author both points to specifics as well as research to support her position. Unfortuneately kindergarten teacher sounds not only vague in her reasoning, but clearly has not looked at any data on the subject. What a shame. I would expect more from an educator.
posted by : Camille on 9/8/2008 at 5:16 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Here in NYC, the cutoff date for public school is Dec 31, and I had no choice about Kindergarten with a Dec 26 child. I think a June cutoff would be nice, so that no one is more than 6 months apart...
posted by : mrspilkington on 9/8/2008 at 5:23 PM Flag For Abuse
-
At mrb: I am a Texan, and I went to school in one of the top-ranked districts in the state. To sum up my feelings about it: if that's the best we can do, that's really sad.
We're planning on homeschooling.
posted by : Seriously on 9/8/2008 at 6:12 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I was an Oct 26th child, and in CT happily went to school at the normal time (I think CT had a Dec 31 date, or even later). Later I was in NYC schools.
I was by FAR the tallest in my classes up until maybe sophomore or maybe junior in high school - including the girls. 6' at age 11, 6'2" at age 13 (and then I stopped). Plus I was at the top of my class academically.
Now, if my parents had insisted that I succeed at athletics in school, *perhaps* I would have done better waiting (and been even huger compared to my classmates). But I think it would have wasted a year of my life, and I think it would have really stunted me academically due to boredom. Plus I still wouldn't have been great shakes in sports.
Oh, and Camille - No matter *what* date you pick, the kids will have a range of at least 1 year - and more if people redshirt. A June cutoff would just shift where that year is.
I think a lot of what she's seeing has to do with Texas sports-based culture - from what I hear from a native Texan friend, many Texas schools are for boys primarily about sports (read football) and band, and academics are often given short shrift.
posted by : jesup on 9/8/2008 at 10:57 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Great article! My friend in Pittsburgh told me that they do the same thing there! She also noticed that they pressure her son to act even more mature because he's tall for his age.
I'm a Texan summer-born mama to a end-o-summer born boy. My son is only two and I'm already thinking about this since I remember what my relatives and I went through in our respective childhoods... some ahead in grade for age, some behind. I was always the youngest or very close to with a mid-August birthday, and I was always toward the top of my classes in academics, competitive in athletics. But, I know what they say about boys and know that, of course, it has nothing to do with academics. I'm actually anxious in the other direction because my son has an early September birthday, and so would be the oldest in his class, but what if he could do just as well as the youngest in the grade above (where many of his current playmates would be)?
Our solution (for now) is montessori: skill/merit-based placement, multi-age classrooms, emphasis on the doing, not the "sitting still", multiple-intelligences engaged (more than nods to whimsy on this), etc.
I am a product of both private and public school, and have worked in "rich"-district public schools recently in CA & TX... NiChLeB, NOT any one state's "culture", is driving these kindergarten atmosphere changes for the worse. All parents need to get involved now and as admirably actively as this essay's author.
posted by : GonzoMama on 9/9/2008 at 12:11 AM Flag For Abuse
-
I thought this article by the NAEYC might be of interest. http://www.naeyc.org/about/positions/Psunacc.asp
posted by : Camille on 9/9/2008 at 9:17 AM Flag For Abuse
-
My daughter's Waldorf school has a cut-off date of June 1 for first grade (Kindergarten cut-off is 4 by June 1, the classes are multi-age). Her birthday is May 25. Every now and then sonmeone asks nme if I am worried that she will be the youngest (and smallest) in her class. But someone has to be the youngest! So why NOT her? What is disappointing is that schools have (misguidedly) pushed skills and work to younger and younger children, many of whom are simply not ready. They are not delayed, they do not have problems. They are just in a program they aren't ready for. So the "solution" is to redshirt them? How about making kindergarten AGE-APPROPRIATE. Then many more students of BOTH genders would fare just fine.
posted by : LeighS on 9/9/2008 at 9:35 AM Flag For Abuse
-
I'm not sure I buy the idea that being a year older will guarantee a particular outcome. Nor do I buy the idea that being chronologically young will forever doom a kid to poor performance and an inability to withstand peer pressure.
Plus, with so many being red-shirted (there are 7 in my daughter's class of 20), those "big" kids don't even stand out for being older anymore.
posted by : hand on 9/9/2008 at 10:33 AM Flag For Abuse
-
This is just another thing I can't believe now that I am a parent. I thought Manhattan was bad when my college roommate was trying to get her two year old into a preschool. Interviews, home visits, essays. Now I shouldn't send my child to kindergarten when she's five because she might be too small or too young. I was four when I started kindergarten with a Nov 28th birthday. We used to have a Dec 31st cut off in PA, now I think it's September 1st. My daughter is already too smart for her own good and she's one.
To blow everyone's mind - Pennsylvania doesn't require children to go to Kindergarten. In fact in PA I can have my daughter sit at home until she's 7 - only then is she required by state law to go to school.
posted by : momtoone on 9/9/2008 at 3:04 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I'm strongly pro-redshirting but not because of sports but because of academics. I have an almost 18 year old son (October birthday in a Sept 1 cutoff system) and 3 year old boy/girl twins (July 23, 6 weeks early). Both twins will be held back based on what I have seen in the class experiences of my older son and his classmates. It doesn't have anything to do with being smart, it has to do with social maturity at key ages. It's not a large study pool but the kids I've seen who were held back, positive experiences, fit in, socially comfortable - no one really cares they have July or whatever birthdays. Everyone I've talked to that did not hold back a summer boy strongly regretted it and I would privately agree knowing their kids.
It's not grade school where the affects kick in, it's high school. If one's child is suffering or uncomfortable socially that is what is going to affect their academics and overall school experience.
posted by : Susan R on 9/9/2008 at 4:12 PM Flag For Abuse
-
"And frankly, it seems unfair — especially to the kids who could probably use another year in preschool if their families could only afford it."
Well, that's a shame for them but why should my children suffer for other children's financial lack? You are acknowledging that some kids may need to be kept back a year but why is it only okay for the poor kids who can't afford it?
My son would have made the kindergarten cut-off by a week. He was born two months early, though, so my husband and I are sending him to kindergarten based on when he should have been born. We probably would have done things differently if kindergarten was fun and games like it used to be but it's too academic too early these days. I say let kids be kids and parents are the best judge of their children's readiness.
posted by : ProudMother on 9/9/2008 at 10:35 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I am so glad this is not an option here (Ontario, Canada). Cut off is January 1st, and there are little or no exceptions. Junior (and senior too, but less to) kindergarten is considered optional, so if your 4-yer old in not ready they can just start at 5, with other 5 year olds. This makes a lot more sense to me then holding a kid back.
Also - in truth, parents don't always know what is best for our child. I teach ballet to 3 year olds and i have many parents who tell me their child is more or less able and thus belongs in this class, rather than the age appropriate one. Less than half the time are the parents right and the children usually struggle for the year. The kids would have been happier had mom just put them where they belong and left it to the teacher's discretion to recommend a change if it wasn't working out.
posted by : EngMama on 9/10/2008 at 10:31 AM Flag For Abuse
-
My son is 4 1/2 yrs old. My husband and I had to make the same decision.His birthday is November 18th. The cut off date here in NY is in December. So it was up to us whether we wanted to send him this year or not. We only sent him to pre-school just last year. I asked his pre-school teacher if she thought he'd be ready for Kindergarten in the fall when I had my conference with her in the Spring of 08'. She assured me that she thought he was ready and that he should do just fine. Now my son is a small little guy at only 36 lbs. So my husband and I talked and talked and we decided to take him to the kindergarten registration. So I did and he did fine. I spoke with one of the teachers and she did mention that he could use some extra time working on his fine motor skills, cutting with scissors etc. I thought to myself isn't that what they are supposed to teach them in Kindergarten? I must be around the same age as the author of this article as she described what kindergaretn used to be, I could totally relate to. I told my husband that because so many kids these days go to pre-school for 2 or 3 years they are expected to know so many things BEFORE entering kindergarten. I was annoyed! Alot of people we knew also said to wait and keep him back another year. We were worried about his size in a world these days where I think there can be alot of bullying in school. But as my husband also pointed out, he was a small child and they have to learn how to deal with these situations. His doctor also told us we may want to wait another year due to his size etc. Well in the end we decided to send him this year at 4 1/2. He is one of the youngest in his class but I know there are a couple of kids in the same boat as him age wise. And he is small but I noticed on the first day of school that he is Not by any means the smallest kid in the class. He seems to be happy and really enjoying school. He's taking the bus to and from school, another thing we worried about but I can't hold his hand forever. We have to learn to let our children go when it's time. As for the whole being bigger and having an advantage, I don't believe a word of it really. And the whole sports thing, lord I can't believe parents would keep there kids back a year for sports, thats rediculous! If at the end of the year they say my son should stay in Kindergarten next year then we will be fine with that. We know in the end that we did what WE thought was right for our son at the time.
posted by : Mom of a young kindergarten boy on 9/10/2008 at 1:31 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I started in NY so with the Dec. 1 cutoff I was 4 when I started Kindergarten, and 17 when I graduated HS. Of course, as you pointed out, Kindergarten is a whole different thing now.
So did you move so you could be in the other school's zone?!
posted by : EG on 9/11/2008 at 12:08 PM Flag For Abuse
-
My son is diagnosed with Aspergers-type autism spectrum disorder, so the push was to get him into school for the academic stimulation. I'm another person in the NYC calendar-year cutoff, and his September birthday is actually early compared to 2 of his classmates, with November and December birthdays. Certainly seems like the delay of a year for all 3 of them, who have the same dx, would've helped with the social element.
The cynical part of me says the board of ed wanted the per-capita money for the program he's in rather than waiting a year for it. But the rest of me thinks that may be out of line.
posted by : autismpublicschools_dot_blogspot on 9/11/2008 at 1:23 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I find it interesting that in all the articles and "studies" that no one has mentioned the cons of redshirting. Is it a con to the child or to the parent???
My oldest of 4 children is a July birthday. The cutoff in WA state is Aug. 31. Since this was my first child, we did the preschool thing and just assumed she would be going to Kindergarten like her classmates. It was her teacher's recommendation, and the Kindergarten teacher's recommendation that she would wait a year. In our school, the preschool teacher and K teacher talk and they do screen every single child for Kindergarten. They suggested that we hold her back. It was our decision, but that was their suggestion. We went through the disappoint, anger, denial, and "she is totally ready" phase before I finally researched and found that EVERY KID IS DIFFERENT!!!! A classmate of hers, same birthday in fact!!, would be moving on to Kindergarten. Another child in her class, MARCH BIRTHDAY, would also be staying behind.
I am happy to say that my now 4th grader is a confident child and a leader in her class. She is not academically above average, she is the shortest in her class (thanks to Dad's genes!) and she is right where she is supposed to be, and she has never been bored. I am happy to have my child with me for another year, because by the time they are in their teens and beyond, they no longer need us! And really, their time with us is so short, let's not push them - children need to stay children as long as possible! My 2 cents...
posted by : musicmommy on 9/11/2008 at 5:57 PM Flag For Abuse
-
The only conculsion to be made from this variety of comments is that each child is an individual and the decision must be made on an individual basis. I started both my Aug birthdays (cut off date August 31st) and both are doing well. My son is so small that at times I do feel bad for him, but he is smart and enjoys a challenge, both academically and in sports. Our pediatrician advised me to send my daughter unless I had any serious reservations about her developmentally. I don't, and I've sent her. I agree with the author about the pressure of red-shirting kids because my daughter will be in the same grade as kids 15 months older than her. While I do feel that this gives her a disadvantage, I believe the most important influence in her life is a strong home and a supportive family. She'll make mistakes but we'll always be there for her.
posted by : august babies on 9/13/2008 at 3:36 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I wish I'd seen this article a few months ago when my son's preschool teacher recommended the same thing for him! Of course she recommended for almost all of the boys in the class, since most had summer birthdays. I'm in a Philadelphia suburb nowhere near TX and the pressure to hold back here is immense as well. You have mirrored my feelings so perfectly, it was like I'd written the article myself! I don't think the sports are as much of an issue as just the social and academic implications up here, but I had a very stressful summer trying to decide what to do. My son is more average academically, not ahead or behind. He's just starting to read 3 letter words! He's a July birthday. He's in public K now (only 1 week into it) so we will see what happens. I had him evaluated privately for K readiness and he passed with flying colors...she told me outright that I'd be doing him a disservice by holding back. I did not want to fork over another 10K for preschool or private K when the benefits seemed so unclear. I know lots of grownups who were on the young side growing up and they are perfectly intelligent, well adjusted people today. I'm rooting for my son all the way!!
posted by : Petdocs on 9/14/2008 at 11:04 AM Flag For Abuse
-
I am so lucky. I read "The Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling" by John T. Gatto and pulled my gifted 5 year old out of kindergarden fast to homeschool her. The teacher said, "How will she learn social skills? How to deal with bullies?" Well she has siblings, lots of friends and I have taught her how to deal with bullies on the public playground already. My daughter is gifted and sitting all day doing worksheets to learn her colors and shapes was killing her. The teacher said, "We teach them obedience and how to follow the rules". Oh, sort of like the army or prison. I wanted her to say they teach them life skills, creativity, how to analyze data, how to think abstractly, something useful. Something besides you cannot touch another child or you will be charged with assault. You cannot talk in the hallways. You cannot talk at lunch. Lunch, while they eat now, the most social of all human events. The lunchroom sounded like a tomb. Redshirt all you want. They still pop out little consumers following the crowd in perpetual adolescence.
posted by : Cassie on 9/14/2008 at 8:28 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Wow! What a great article. My son's birthday is October 20th and he'll be 6 this year. He is in 1st Grade and we really took a lot of slack from friends last year when we started him in Kinder at 4. We thought he was ready and figured we could always hold him back if it didn't work but wanted to give him the opportunity to try (besides he was sooooo excited to start!) I'm not going to lie, we wondered a lot if we had made the right decision because all you ever hear about is how immature they are but like the article said, most of the time I think they mean it is age-appropriate rather than superior. His kinder teacher told us at a conference that if the child is academically ready for the next step and you hold them back, sometimes it is worse behaviorally because the child is bored. I agree that they thrive on challenge. Our son is very social and this year is in an advanced reading group in his 1st Grade. I think that is pretty superior and now seeing the way it turned out I am very glad we started him early.
posted by : October Mom on 9/14/2008 at 10:12 PM Flag For Abuse
-
This was such a good article. I have a friend whose daughter was held back becuse that was what his ex-wife wanted - for the socialization reason. He ended up just letting her do it so that she'd leave him alone. Poor kid was bored in preschool for another year. I personally didn't start my kids in any formal schooling until they were six and they all are doing fine. I think the main point would be that you know your child better than the system - including a teacher who has 25 other kids to watch and assess. Do what's right for YOUR child.
posted by : akmom on 9/17/2008 at 12:35 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I appreciate what everyone is saying, but do you any of you have husbands who were picked on because of size throughout their youth? My husband is average height now, but did not hit puberty until age 17. He had great friends who didn't care about his size, but he has struggled with serious body-confidence problems as a result of the "meanies" out there who did. I can tell you that I will almost certainly hold back my summer-birthday 4-year-old next year, because I want him to have a fighting chance of looking the same age as his classmates, not only in kindergarten, but in high school as well. Those of you who worry that your small or young-ish daughters will look even smaller because we're holding the boys back -- please realize that the plight of a littler female is NOT comparable with the problems associated with being a small male. I'm just 5 feet tall myself, and I was always made to feel like I was MORE feminine because I was tiny. Tiny males are told they are LESS masculine. Holding back very small or young boys often has nothing to do with sports -- I live in Texas, and I don't care if my son plays sports or not. But he's small, emotionally expressive, and smart, and I just want him to love school and not have the distraction of feeling so physically different from the other kids. Also, no one has mentioned the fact that once you start your child in public school, he's on their turf for more waking hours than he's in your home, for the next 13 years. I think it's okay to keep a child in the nest one more year if that's a healthy place where he can grow and learn about the world and what his parents value. Sorry for the soapbox! :-)
posted by : Little Mama on 9/19/2008 at 11:01 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I have a soon to be 4yr old (Nov) who will miss the TX cut off. He'll be an older 6 when he goes to kindergarten. I worry about him being bored and suffering for it.
He is a smart boy. He is an active boy and needs an outlet. I worry he'd be labeled ADHD by an eager teacher when he's simply acting like a boy.
I think it's awesome that you found a school that was on the same page as you. If I had the choice I wouldn't hold my son back and I'd have words for the teacher that suggested for those reasons you were given.
I have seriously considered homeschooling with the possibility of entering him in a public school later. Jury is still out.
BTW I was 4 1/2 when I entered the school sys. I was always the smallest but I fought the hardest to keep my standing. I did rather well if you ask me.
posted by : Candiandsons on 10/10/2008 at 6:10 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Thank goodness we don't live in Texas. Given the likelihood that any child is going to be good enough to financially benefit from sports, regardless of size, it seems unwise to delay his academic acheivement due to that reason. We have a Dec 31st cut off for entering school and my son is the youngest in his class. Despite being the youngest, he's popular and ahead of his class peers in reading and math. It's not because he's innately brilliant but because we work with him at home and place huge value on education and social skills. Perhaps rather than trying to gain an edge at the expense of educational development, those parents who are holding their children back to the boredom of pre-school should try to give their children an edge by giving them more "coaching" at home.
posted by : Amazed in Toronto on 10/16/2008 at 3:50 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Something most people don't realize is that kindergarten is entirely optional most states, including Texas. While 42 states require school districts to offer kindergarten, only Arizona, Arkansas, Delaware, Florida, Louisiana, Maryland, New Mexico, Ohio, Oklahoma, Rhode Island, South Carolina, Tennessee, Utah, Virginia, and West Virginia require kindergarten-age students to either attend school or be homeschooled.
posted by : Lee on 11/20/2008 at 11:41 AM Flag For Abuse
-
Oh brother. You know what the answer to all this is?
Take sports teams out of the schools.
As in other countries who are whipping our butts academically, all sports should be community based and based upon age requirements only. Let the schools deal with academics and maybe the arts.
I have a summer boy. He'll go to school when he's 5. That "other kids will pick on him" is even being given as a reason to hold him back is completely twisted. If other kids are picking on him, that's the other kids and their parents problem. Suspend kids for picking on each other: one strike and you're out for one day. How did we get so assbackward on all this?
posted by : Janice P on 1/4/2009 at 9:55 AM Flag For Abuse
-
And another thing. How is it that my friends from India, England, the Netherlands, etc. are simply aghast at how behind we are academically when their children are entering school at the same ages or younger, and performing at higher levels earlier on? What is it about us that our children are emotionally coddled to the point of making excuses for their not being able to handle rigorous academics unless everyone around them is the same age or that an estimation of a child's good performance is only in relation to other kids not doing as well? That's some kind of messed up curve system.
Holding a child back because they are small and so that they won't be bullied is a privilege that not all parents can afford; by taking part in that privilege, you are directly becoming an oppressor of those children who cannot (for whatever reason) afford or take part in that privilege. Unless parents start stepping up and challenging the schools, getting involved and making stinks about other kids who are stinkers, then they are part of the problem. Where is this defeatist "I can't fight it, so I'll just have to become part of the problem" attitude coming from? No wonder so many kids are messed up and picking on younger/smaller children - the kids see their parents modeling the behavior that makes it alright through their sins of omission to take action on behalf of their own children and on behalf of those children who don't have adults to advocate for them.
posted by : Janice P on 1/4/2009 at 10:04 AM Flag For Abuse
-
We lived in Nevada when my son entered kindergarten and then the cutoff was December 1st. He entered at four years old and has been successful all through school and life despite some misguided educators trying to label him with ADA. I told them get over it, he's a boy.
I think parents worry far too much over this issue. Yes, it can be a problem however if parents take as much time to work with their sons as they do worrying about whether he should enter kindergarten, his success may just work out.
posted by : babyowl on 1/30/2009 at 9:52 AM Flag For Abuse
-
As a mother of a summer birthday boy I had to write my opinion because I feel that it isn't been represented the right way. I am a middle-class white women as many people have mentioned are the ones who chose to keep their boys back a year. I will make the chose to keep my son out of Kindergarten until he turns 6. I feel that this is the best decision for him. I AM doing it to give him an advantage in all categories of his life. A lot of the parents on here talk as if giving my "white" son an advantage is not right. Why would you make the chose to NOT give your son the best chance of achieving. My husband was a May baby. He wasn't the oldest in his class and he was not the youngest in his kindergarten class but when first grade came around he has to do it twice. He said being held back in first grade was way worse then being kept back a year in Preschool.
I am also looking ahead to High School. I am not willing to send my 17 year old son off to College. I feel that you should be 18 when you move away from home and start life on your own. 17 year olds, especially boys, are not always ready for the pressures the college life brings.
I feel that every parent should choose what they feel is best for there child. But don't look down on those parents who feel there child will benefit from being 6 when entering Kindergarten.
posted by : BakersMom on 3/11/2009 at 1:48 PM Flag For Abuse
-
BakersMom,
Isn't it your responsibility as a parent to make sure your son is ready for the "pressures" college life brings???? You can't expect a school to "teach" that! That's why this whole issue drives me crazy.....if they are academically on-par, then why shouldn't they be in their age appropriate grade and off to college after graduation....its YOUR job as a mom to help guide him as he goes out on his own. How is one more year going to make that difference?
posted by : rediculous on 4/6/2009 at 3:11 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I am currently a kindergarten teacher and our cutoff is Oct 1. The author is correct that kindergarten today is not the kindergarten many of us remember. BY the end of the year my stduents are writing 5 sentence paragraphs using transitions words, and a conclusion. My point is that for some kids they are not ready for kinder when they turn 5 within a month or 2 of the cutoff. I have students that made the cutoff by a few days, they turned 5 in Sept, and then by Oct I already had kids turning 6. Yes all kids are different, but when you only have 5 or 6 years on the planet 1 year is 20% of someone's life.
When I have students that seen immature, or at a lower level academically, I look to see when their birthday is Then it's like Aug 31.... ohhh. Now as I said before all kids are different, and you should not make you decision to send your child to school because the neighbor kid is going and your kid seems better/smarter/more mature or whatever, do what is best for your child!
posted by : kinder teacher on 5/16/2009 at 10:53 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Why is it that kids are allowed to be held back if they aren't ready but can't enter early if they are? My daughters have November and December birthdays and missed the Oct. 1 cut off for K. They were ready, especially my second who was ready when she was 3. She just finished K and received a stellar report card with notes like "very mature and responsible". She was that when she was 3! I wasn't proud but rather disappointed that she wasn't challenged, improving herself. My husband and his brother have November and December birthdays and started K at age 4. They ended up at MIT and then at Columbia Med. School. My husband then did a fellowship at Harvard. He played soccer, hockey, and tennis throughout high school and college. In fact now at age 45 he plays in his own men's league hockey team once a week. "Red-shirting" is specious thinking.
posted by : tipytop on 8/5/2009 at 2:41 PM Flag For Abuse
-
I am a kindergarten teacher. I hope the poor behavior of the Texas educators don't influence parents decisions as to whether or not to hold back their child. If you're unsure about holding back your child, ask the school district if you could come in and observe in a kindergarten classroom. I would welcome future parents in my classroom. Don't let a child chronological age determine if they are ready for kindergarten. Their developmental age should determine that. I personally have never requested that a parent hold their child back until the next school year. However, this year after one week, I am seriously considering doing just that. I have a child who is academically ready for kindergarten. However, he is not ready socially, emotionally or physically. He can barely hold a pencil and has very weak fine motor skills. He hides behind tables and anything else around. He cannot sit still during instruction or while I am reading a story. And, the worst part is he frequently rolls around on the carpet and cries (whines). It is very frustrating to me because I know developmentally this poor child is not ready for kindergarten. He is currently only 4 years old. Our cut off date is September 30th. He disrupts the class no less than 50 times in 2 1/2 hours. Keeping him in kindergarten is not only doing him a disservice, but also all of my other students. My constant redirecting of him is negatively impacting the education of my other 25 students. He has had no preschool experience, which is what I am about to suggest to his parents. He absolutely needs another year to mature. I want kindergarten to be a positive experience for all of my children. It is definitely not for him.
posted by : k teacher on 9/1/2009 at 8:38 PM Flag For Abuse
-
In response to why children cannot enter early if they are ready----Our district does allow students to test in early. In fact, although our cut is September 30, I once had a student, born in November, test in. At our first conference, the mother expressed her concerns about having her child tested in early. She feared she made a serious mistake. This child was more than ready academically, physically, socially and emotionally. I reassured this mother that she absolutely made the right decision to have her child enter kindergarten early.
posted by : k teacher on 9/1/2009 at 8:43 PM Flag For Abuse
-
What I find disturbing is the assumption that the ONLY way children can interact is competitively. If that's what we or our educators are teaching our children, then we reap what we sow: We set up a situation where it's more likely that smaller and younger kids will suffer from being around older, bigger, smarter kids who feel empowered to 'beat' their younger and slower 'competitors'.But children aren't only competitive: elsewhere in the world, older children can and do look after and help younger children, if that's a behaviour that is modelled for them, expected of them, and praised to them; younger children do look up to and learn from their slightly-older and more capable peers. The self-esteem of both parties isn't damaged in this equation.Any kindergarten that can't or won't teach peaceful, cooperative relations between all kinds of different children isn't worth the time or money. I'm frankly a little boggled by what some of the kindergartens mentioned here thought was important. But I'm from New Zealand, what would I know? Only that the rather laid-back lassez-faire education I received has led to as interesting a career and life as I could possibly want.
posted by : NZmum on 9/3/2009 at 7:53 PM Flag For Abuse
-
Thank you for not holding your son back, if only because I'm the mother of the poor 5 year old {end of June bday} who shares a table in Kindergarten with two HUGE 6 year old boys. One who turned 6 two weeks before she turned 5. It's ridiculous and shouldn't be allowed.
posted by : Kmwhl on 10/22/2009 at 11:26 PM Flag For Abuse
-
My son's birthday is Sept 7, and school has a Sept 1 cutoff. (As a side note - have you all noticed the wide variety in cut-off dates across the country? No matter what we do, there will be age disparity by the time these boys get to college.) The school admitted him to 'early' (as if one week would make a difference) and I never heard the end of it throughout kindergarten (he's in 2nd grade now.) He was not the youngest child in the class, and many are only a few weeks older - of course a good chunk of the boys are almost a full year older. And two days into the school year, when I asked his teacher how he was doing, she said "well, he's awfully young - maybe you should talk with the principal." This year the school instituted a no early-admittance policy. I'm glad to hear about others in the same situation. My feeling has been that I'd rather have him motivated by kids slightly (to significantly) older than he is, than working beneath his ability with younger kids. Had he spent another year in pre-school he'd have been surrounded mainly by 3 year olds. What good would that have done?
posted by : lmbrod on 10/27/2009 at 2:48 AM Flag For Abuse
-
OK, I have a July baby who I *gasp* did not enroll in Kindergarten when he was five! He was smart and sociable...a little too sociable, actually. I heard all the stories about doing it for sports, which was crazy. That thought had never crossed my mind. So the next year, we enrolled him in first grade. He is the youngest in his class, and guess what...he will graduate high school first in his class in June!
posted by : another mom on 10/27/2009 at 10:13 AM Flag For Abuse
-
I'm so glad to have come across this article and posts about it. My husband and I were just arguing about my older son (who has an Aug 17 bday) and when to start him. I was steadfast in my desire to start him at 6, thinking I had read and done all the right research and just knew that was the thing to do. Now I am changing my mind and will try to judge whether he is ready socially (academically he's already whiz and physically he's very tall, he looks like a 5 year old at 3 yrs. so no problems there). I will definitely be in the pool for application to our San Diego charter schools to get him in at 5 and I will definitely continue reading up on this topic. Thanks for the insight.
posted by : san diego mom on 11/12/2009 at 1:03 PM Flag For Abuse
