feedback for "Parental Advisory: Defending Dependence"

1. Thank you! My son never used a pacifier, but he still drinks from a bottle at 2. He can use a sippy cup, and is very independent in other ways (like the child the mom in the article was talking about). I never understood why he was supposed to give it up at 1 anyway. I tried, and he really had a hard time, so we went back. I know some moms who still nurse, and for some reason this is considered OK. (I live in San Francisco, so I don't think this is the same everywhere.)

   posted by : LauraP06 on 11/19/2008 at 3:40 PM Flag For Abuse

2. My kids did not use bottles much, but they started using sippy cups at around six months. When my husband and I toured daycares for our toddler, we were told time and again that bottles and sippy cups were verboten. That night I took the top off the sippy (my son was 17 months old) and never looked back. I've started subsequent children on open cups by 18 months just to get that over with, but it might be easier for children who are not accustomed or attached to bottles. (I was their pacifier for over a year apiece and in one case over two years, which is a whole different story.)

   posted by : BBBGMOM on 11/19/2008 at 3:47 PM Flag For Abuse

3. My son is 21 months old and still teething. He loves to chew on things, so I give him a pacifier from time to time to satisfy that need. I would rather him chew on that than to chew on other household items that aren't as safe. He also had some trouble with biting so I think the pacifier also helps with that (he also had a teething ring to use at day care). He's not attached to it: the minute he starts playing he drops it somewhere and doesn't think of it again. But when he comes to school with the paci, his teachers always ask him what he's doing with it. He also sucks his thumb. As a former thumbsucker (until age 5) I don't have a problem with that either. I have a friend whose mother really looks down on the thumb and said she stopped my friend from sucking her thumb. Then I found out she was on the bottle until 5 years old. Helloooo?

   posted by : lilmissyny on 11/20/2008 at 9:10 AM Flag For Abuse

4. My 20 month old is still having a bottle to go down for a nap. Our pediatrician is happy with it. Her only concern is that before bed if the bottle has milk, the last few sips need to be water. This is to ward off tooth decay. You stop making saliva the minute you fall asleep, and the sugars in the milk are bad when they pool near the teeth once the wee one has nodded off.

   posted by : camamma on 11/21/2008 at 1:40 AM Flag For Abuse

5. My parents took a laidback approach and allowed me to keep my pacifier until I was ready to give it up at age 5. Then, I had a lot of orthodontic work to correct my two strangely turned-in front teeth and overbite. The orthodontist gave my parents all sorts of grief about letting me have that pacifier too long.
   
   Imagine my surprise when, 26 years later, my daughter has the exact same turned-in front teeth and overbite. She has never used a pacifier.
   
   Trust your own instincts above all else, fellow moms and dads.

   posted by : edamommy on 11/21/2008 at 11:58 PM Flag For Abuse

6. my 27 month old has a bottle of wtered down milk before nap and one before bed. The one before bed she ends up brushing her teeth after.
   We are going to have another baby in march, so there is no way I'm going to push her to give up her bottles before then. She doesn't walk around with one all day. She'll give up bottles when she is ready--my guess is once she's about 3 or so and gets more involved in actually palying with other kids. Kids her age are still breastfeeding, mostly for comfort, so why take this little comfort away from my daughter so young?
   Some pediatricians (Brazelton, for one) beleive kids have a real need to suck till about 2 1/2.

   posted by : monkeyhead on 11/24/2008 at 3:13 PM Flag For Abuse

7. Hate Brazelton. He has said stuff about his own mom that curled my hair. Babies need bottles and pacifiers. Kids don't. You take it away and they might cry for ten minutes then life goes on. I think the real deal here is parents dont want their babies to grow up and are afraid of making them cry.

   posted by : Alice on 11/27/2008 at 12:20 AM Flag For Abuse

8. Amen. My daughter asks for her "paci" when she's very upset or sleepy, and I'm happy to hand it over. She doesn't use it all day, and she's an extremely independent, verbal child. Who cares if she wants her pacifier? She'll give it up when she's ready. Of course, I sucked my thumb until I went to college (!), so I have personal prejudices about this - all I know is, it didn't harm me (or my teeth - no braces!). All it did was give a little extra comfort with no cost to anyone, and let's face it, the world is not exactly a comforting place.

   posted by : mama j on 11/29/2008 at 2:12 PM Flag For Abuse

9. Slater-2 uses a sippy cup. She started using them at about 13 months. She stopped using a pacifier at 15 months.
   
   
   I'm all for comfort if that's what you want to give your child, but if you can talk, then you need to pull that pacifier out of your mouth!
   
   
   if you can say 'gimme my pacifier' then you're too old for one.
   
   i feel the same with potty training. If you can tell when you went poop, and assist in the diaper changing by gapping your legs open and pulling your diaper off, then you need to start getting on the pot (potty).
   
   Tippy/sippy cups i guess are dependent on your child's motor skills.
   
   
   My kids were never big on pacifiers, or bottles....or blankies.
   
   Denim-4 has one, but it sits on the chair in his closet. he doesn't sleep with it or drag it around. it just sits on the chair...safely. i think he gets his weirdness from his father.

   posted by : ZBecks on 12/3/2008 at 5:56 PM Flag For Abuse