Labor Day is right around the corner and you know what? While I like a three-day weekend as much as the next person, I’m not a huge fan. Celebrating work by taking time off has never made a lot of sense to me. Plus, many of the Labor Day weekends of my youth were spent sitting in traffic on the NJ Turnpike in cars that had no air conditioning. Those same cars also had a very distinct eau de chien, as my father loved his dogs and hated cleaning out his car.
The other reason is that since becoming a parent, the word “labor” really only has one meaning to me. I’ve gone into labor three times and it is aptly named, my friends, because it’s hard work. And there is no three-day weekend to celebrate THAT. But surprisingly, labor and Labor Day weekend have a few things in common. So I put together this handy, dandy list of 10 ways actual labor is sort of like Labor Day.
Let’s get started! 1 of 11
Just don’t even bother trying to look cute. 2 of 11
Whether it's labor or Labor Day, you know you're going to all hot, red faced and sweaty - so really, why bother with hair and makeup?
This woman is probably in Norway. It's not hot there. She can wear makeup and it won't melt off. She is also definitely not in someone's sweltering backyard in the suburbs chasing around kids and stress eating macaroni salad. She also is not pushing out a baby right now.
Photo Credit: Stock Images
Regaining a certain degree of freedom. 3 of 11
You might get the righteous sniff from the church lady. 4 of 11
If you wear white after Labor Day, proper ladies and gentlemen may give you the righteous sniff because for some reason, you're not supposed to. After you've been in labor, you can wear white to your own wedding, but proper ladies and gentlemen will definitely give you the righteous sniff.
Photo Credit: Screenshot from Hulu
You won’t be needing these. 5 of 11
Labor Day weekend is about heading to the beach or the pool. Labor is about having a health baby. Either way, you won't be wearing pants.
Photo Credit: Suat Eman
Oh. You went shopping. Yay. 6 of 11
You know what also happens on Labor Day? Sales. People buying tons of stuff that they may or not need. You know what happens when you have a baby? People buy you a ton of stuff you may or may not need. Thanks for the puppy, Aunt Frances. He's really cute and... bitey.
Photo Credit: Stuart Miles
It kicks off the season. 7 of 11
What happens right after Labor Day? The football season swings into high gear, consuming your weekends with watching large men grunting and routing around. You know what every weekend after your labor will consist of? Watching your baby grunt and nuzzle and rout around.
Oh hey. 8 of 11
There's a pretty good chance you're going to run into someone you don't want to see. It might be your weird Uncle Pete at the backyard BBQ or the awkward co-worker who you don't really know, who thinks it's a great idea to come see you in the hospital.
Photo Credit: Imagery Majestic
Thanks workers! 9 of 11
Labor Day is supposed to be a celebration of the diligence and hark work of the American people, but often politicians and labor unions preen about taking all the credit for it. Labor is supposed to be celebration of a women's amazing strength and tenacity, but often husbands and OBs preen about taking all the credit for it.
Photo Credit: -Marcus-
The nights… 10 of 11
You know what happens after Labor Day *and* after labor? The days start to get a lot shorter and the nights start to get a lot longer.
Photo Credit: Vichaya Kiatying-Angsulee
The adventures await! 11 of 11
Labor Day represents the end of a long, hot summer and you can never be sure what adventures the fall is going to bring. Your actual labor is the end of a long pregnancy and you can never be sure what wonderful new experiences you'll have with your new baby!
Photo Credit: Imagery Majestic
Read more from Julie at her blog Rants from MommyLand. Follow Julie on Facebook , Pinterest and Twitter for additional goofy nonsense at no extra charge. You can catch up right here on all her posts for her Babble Voices blog, Rants in My Pants.