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20 Lessons Ive Learned on the Way to Turning 40

 

I recently turned 40. And, it was my best birthday yet. Since my birthday is in December, I have been teasing all of my friends, all year, about turning 40 and getting old.  But of course now that I am 40, I can admit that it is not old at all.  Below, I’ve provided you with 20 life lessons that I’ve learned along the way.

 


  • 1. 40 is not old…It’s Grown! 1 of 20
    1. 40 is not old...It's Grown!
    I truly feel grown in every sense of the word. I'm a responsible adult that takes care of my children, my husband, and my career.....and still find time to give back to my community. Photo Credit: K. Tyler
  • 2. My testimony can help someone else. 2 of 20
    2.  My testimony can help someone else.
    Many people are not so willing to share their testimony. They may be carrying around shame, hurt or embarrassment. And let's face it -- people can be so judgmental. But, there is someone out there that could benefit from your story. I've had to learn to share my story so that I could help someone else. Photo Credit: Lamar Tyler
  • 3. I had to forgive myself for past transgressions. 3 of 20
    3.  I had to forgive myself for past transgressions.
    It's been very hard to forgive myself for the mistakes of my past. But, I found that healing comes from letting go and moving on. I've accomplished this by learning from my mistakes and by not repeating them. "When you know better...you do better." Photo Credit: Lamar Tyler
  • 4. At some point, I had to stop caring about what people think. 4 of 20
    4.  At some point, I had to stop caring about what people think.
    I used to put too much stock into what other people thought about my actions. And it was stifling my progress and my dreams. I had to start taking other people's opinions for what they were....opinions. And I had to start being confident in my decisions and plans. Photo Credit: Lamar Tyler
  • 5. Your kids can break your heart too. 5 of 20
    5.  Your kids can break your heart too.
    I never knew that kids could cause you heartache.....just like a bad relationship. Hell, it's worse. Now that I look back, I've probably broken my parents' hearts at times. Photo Credit: Lamar Tyler
  • 6. You have to let go of the bad in order to make room for the good. 6 of 20
    6. You have to let go of the bad in order to make room for the good.
    If you want good things in your life, let go of some of your bad habits and relationships. When I finally found the strength to let go of a bad relationship, and when I finally stopped some of my bad habits...like dating people I should not have been dating and hanging around people that weren't good for me, I opened myself up to some really good things and people (i.e my sweetie pie of a husband.) Photo Credit: Harry Washington
  • 7. I never thought I would have a muffin top. But, I do. And my family loves it. 7 of 20
    7.  I never thought I would have a muffin top. But, I do. And my family loves it.
    I never thought I would have one..but I do. Which is why I have mastered the art of sucking in when I take pictures. And it is hard to get rid of it too. But hey..after carrying 4 kids...I still look good. I don't like my muffin top and I am trying to get rid of it. But my family loves it. My husband and kids still rub it like I am pregnant. They can't keep their hands off of my belly and they love to hug me and squeeze me. It comforts them. But my flat belly will return...it just has to. Photo Credit: J. Tyler
  • 8. I haven’t learned a new dance since I was in my 20’s. 8 of 20
    8. I haven't learned a new dance since I was in my 20's.
    No, I will not be teaching you how to do the Dougie. Every dance that I try ultimately looks like a two step. But, I can still do a mean wop and the snake. Photo Credit: Ronnie Tyler
  • 9. Statistics don’t define me….I do. 9 of 20
    9. Statistics don't define me....I do.
    I was pregnant by 19. And eventually became a single mother of two. Per statistics, I should be uneducated, unemployed, and still single. But guess what... I have a Master's degree in Electrical Engineering, graduated with honors, I have a successful career, and a loving husband....booyah! I make my own path. Photo Credit: Ronnie Tyler
  • 10. There’s nothing wrong with going home….I did. 10 of 20
    10. There's nothing wrong with going home....I did.
    When I was 29, I sold my home, put my stuff in storage, and my kids and I moved in with my parents. I needed that. There's no shame in letting your parents help you or having to go home. A lot of people do it. (Just don't make it permanent..lol..) Photo Credit: Lamar Tyler
  • 11. You can find true love. 11 of 20
    11.  You can find true love.
    No matter how much it hurts right now...you will find love again. Just be open to experiencing it and don't let your past experiences dictate your future. I was once hurting so bad...I literally couldn't breath. But, I am so happy now that I can hardly believe it!! Photo Credit: Daryl Brown
  • 12. I’m not a perfect mom…and I’m OK with it. 12 of 20
    12.  I'm not a perfect mom...and I'm OK with it.
    I'm not crafty, my cakes always turn out lopsided, I can't sew.....and this list can go on and on. But guess what...I don't care. I'm a great mom because I love my kids, I sacrifice for my kids...I am present with my kids. Photo Credit: Lamar Tyler
  • 13. Your family doesn’t have to know all of your business. 13 of 20
    13.  Your family doesn't have to know all of your business.
    Sometimes sharing things about your marriage and goals with your family is not such a good idea. Just because they love YOU, doesn't mean they are friends of your marriage, doesn't mean they give good advice, and it doesn't mean that they understand your dreams. Photo Credit: Lamar Tyler
  • 14. I love my freckles… 14 of 20
    14. I love my freckles...
    I have not always been able to say that...but now I can. Photo Credit: Lamar Tyler
  • 15. You never know where life will lead you. 15 of 20
    15.  You never know where life will lead you.
    I could never have even imagined the life that I live now...I am so blessed. If I had given up and stopped trying, I know that I would not be here today. Photo Credit: Ronnie Tyler
  • 16. If I’m not my best…my family suffers. 16 of 20
    16.  If I'm not my best...my family suffers.
    I need some me time...I have to take care of myself. When I am tired, when I am irritable, when I am stressed..my family suffers. Photo Credit: Lamar Tyler
  • 17. The things that people teased me about as kid…are my greatest assets now! 17 of 20
    17.  The things that people teased me about as kid...are my greatest assets now!
    Your eyes, forehead, lips and ears are too big. You name it..I heard it. But now, I love my big brown eyes and my full lips. Photo Credit: Daryl Brown
  • 18. I don’t like football. 18 of 20
    18.  I don't like football.
    I faked it when Lamar and I were dating and the first couple of years of our marriage. Don't judge me...I got that ring in 11 months flat...lol. Whew, it feels good to come clean. But, I do enjoy going to games with him or watching it with him from time to time. Photo Credit: Lamar Tyler
  • 19. I can be whatever I want to be. 19 of 20
    19.  I can be whatever I want to be.
    I'm a mathematician, I'm an Electrical Engineer, I'm a certified project manager, I'm a filmmaker, I'm a writer, I'm a mom of four, I'm a singer (ok..in my mind I'm a singer ..but my family would disagree), I'm a wife, I'm happy, I'm sad sometimes....I'm all that! Photo Credit: Lauren Thomas
  • 20. I still have a lot of growing to do. 20 of 20
    20.  I still have a lot of growing to do.
    I have some growing to do. I am still learning and striving to be a better wife, better mother, better citizen, better Christian. Photo Credit: Lamar Tyler

When you were little, did you think 40 was old?  I did.  Please share with me some of life’s lessons that you’ve learned along the way.

 

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More Husband Wife Life on Babble:

8 Ways to Tell If Your Man Means It When He Says That He’s Ready for Marriage

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10 Things Every Single Needs to Know About Marriage

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