I’m going to try something different here on Danoah Unleashed this month. I’m going to focus the entire month’s posts (4 total) all on the same topic. This month: different aspects of single parenting.
The Five Big Advantages of Being a Single Parent
I often hear single parents complain about being single parents. It’s so hard not having a spouse to help out. It’s so hard to do anything with friends. Dating is so hard. Keeping the house clean is so hard. The list could easily go on.
And while I sympathize as a fellow single parent, and while I know that there’s an adjustment period, can I just tell you that a really big part of me loves being a single parent? I mean, there are some BIG advantages that being a single parent gives me.
1) Guess who makes all the decisions. As a single parent, I decide just about everything when it comes to my time with my kid. What we do, where we go, what we eat, who we visit, where we shop, what we watch, which pets we can have, where we vacation, and more. Sure, some things have to be a joint decision between my child’s mother and me, but for the most part, we do our own thing.
2) Guess how often I argue about money. The money is all on me. And while it can be stressful being the only source of family income, it is also really nice to decide what gets spent and where. I decide where we live. I decide what restaurants we eat at. I decide what we can splurge on and when we need to clamp down on our spending. I decide what car I can afford. It is no secret that finances are one of the biggest struggles in any marriage, and it’s just something I don’t have to deal with.
3) Guess whose kid gets to learn more responsibility. As a single parent, I am much more inclined to make my kid more of a partner and less of a dependent. We are a team, and we both know it. We both keep the house clean. We both sit down and plan out our time. We both work toward family goals together. Single parents can’t do it all for their kids, and that’s a good thing.
4) Guess who gets all of dad’s (or mom’s) bonding time. Bonding with your kid is important, wouldn’t you agree? You have probably also heard that if you’re married or in a committed relationship, you need to make sure your marriage or relationship are your priority so that you can be a good parent to your kid. Single parents don’t have to worry about that, which means their kids get all the bonding and relationship building time.
5) Guess who doesn’t have to deal with the drama. Married parents often find themselves nagging the living heck out of each other. As people, we tend to watch our life scales so that we can make sure they’re always balanced. Am I doing more than she is? I wish she helped in the kitchen more. Why am I doing all the cooking and laundry? Why doesn’t she appreciate me going to work? I wish she would drink less. I wish she would watch less TV. I wish… I wish… I wish… Single parents just find a way to do it all, and they make their lives work the only way they can. On their own and as a team with their children. With no balance to guard, kids will often learn just how powerful it can be to get the job done.
Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing
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More of me on Danoah Unleashed:
My Kid’s Booger Problem Just Got Personal
When Mommy & Daddy Believe Very Different Things
I Bit My Kid’s Head Off For No Real Reason Today
For My Kid’s First Birthday, I Got Him a Facebook Account
Why the Heck Would it Be Where it Goes?