Categories

Is Parenting Making Us Fat?

You’ve heard of pregnancy weight, but what about parenting weight? It’s not the pounds you put on carrying a baby for 9 months but the weight you gain after you get home and start being a full-on parent. It’s no secret that kids don’t have the most sophisticated palate (unless they belong to Gwyneth Paltrow). Even if you can trick ‘em into eating something green, it usually needs to be deep fried or smothered in cheddar cheese, and I think we all know that kids tend to eat three bits and leave the rest for us to … clean up.  Also combining no time to exercise with sleep deprivation and all these new opportunities to snack is a recipe for Spanx. But navigating the road from babyhood, through toddlerhood and beyond is like trying to tiptoe through a minefield except instead of explosives, it’s high fructose corn syrup. No wonder so many of us end up in mom jeans to hide our muffin top.

Maybe we should just give ourselves a pass until they get to college. Then they can put on the freshman 15, and we can finally take it off.

Here are nine ways parenting makes us pack on the pounds.

  • Birthday Cake 1 of 9
    cake

    At some point you will find that almost every weekend you (and by you I mean your child) will be invited to some sort of birthday party situation. And at every birthday party what will you find? If you said birthday cake you would be correct. And after the kids are given a tiny piece the adults will be handed a huge piece as a "thanks for coming and bringing a gift" kind of sweet gesture. How do you turn that down? I basically just have an all or none personality so when I'm not eating sweets, I'm good but when I am, I'm ALWAYS EATING SWEETS.

     

     

    Image: Flickr

  • Birthday Party Pizza 2 of 9
    pizza

     The most popular thing to serve at birthday parties is pizza. Pizza is delicious. Yea, kids don't have a monopoly on liking the taste of pizza. But usually my kids don't eat four pieces. I wish I could say the same.

     

    Image: Flickr

  • French Fries 3 of 9
    French fries

    You forgot about McDonald's fries right? Then you succumbed to the ease and comfort that is a Happy Meal, and once again you tasted a McDonald's fry. THEY ARE SO GOOD. THERE IS NO FRY LIKE IT ON THIS PLANET. DAMN YOU AND YOUR SWEET, FRIED, HOT, SALTY DELICIOUSNESS!!!!!!

     

    Image: Flickr

  • Girl Scout Cookies 4 of 9
    samoas

    You know your nipples got a little tingly when you saw these Samoas. Don't lie! It seems like ever since my daughter became a Daisy a couple of years ago, my house has been full of Girl Scout cookies. If you can resist the temptation of a Thin Mint you are a bigger woman than I.

     

    Image: Flickr

  • Mac & Cheese 5 of 9
    kraft

    I can't tell you how many times I've made a big old pot of mac and cheese, served up a couple of plastic Jake and the Neverland Pirate bowls of it and then fell face first into the pot eating the rest of it with a big wooden spoon. Each time I promise myself today will be different. Today, I will have some rice and veggies and maybe a dry piece of fish. Today, I will serve up the mac and cheese and quickly put the rest into a Tupperware container to be eaten by my children the next day. But each and every time, I end up with a big yellow cheese stained smile. Is there a recovery program for that?

     

    Image: Flickr

  • Halloween Candy 6 of 9
    halloween

    So you're on a new diet or cleanse or enjoying a "gluten-free lifestyle" or whatever the hell you're up to when out of nowhere, BOO! It's Halloween, and there's mad candy everywhere you look. You're not weak, inferior, or lacking willpower if you cave and eat 18 "fun-sized" Snickers. And you're certainly not alone.

     

    Image: Flickr

  • Breakfast Cereal 7 of 9
    cereal

    You haven't had it since you were a kid right? And then you had a kid and thought, "What the heck? They love this stuff, and at least they're eating something in the morning!" I'm sure, like me, you tried a healthy cereal, and your kid looked at it like you just presented them with a big bowl of wet cement. And now, like me, you have a pantry full of delicious Cap n' Crunch which you are solely in charge of eating.

     

    Image: Flickr

  • Pudding 8 of 9
    pudding

    When was the last time (before you had kids) that you whisked up a big batch of chocolate pudding? That's right, you haven't. But kids love pudding! And we love pudding too! Unfortunately the last time I checked, chocolate pudding didn't make any healthy eating star foods lists.

     

    Image: Flickr

  • Two Dinners 9 of 9
    lobster

    The kids eat at 5:30, and you try not to eat with them but then you realize that you're starving and you steal a few fish sticks and then a few more until you've really, if you're being honest, eaten dinner. But then, finally, the kids go to bed, and now it's time to actually have a grown-up meal (and no, I never eat lobster but a girl can fantasize!!) and before you know it you've had two dinners. Not cool.

Want more from me on Babble? Try 11 Bad Reasons to Have Another Baby , 10 Ways My Life is Better Since I Quit Drinking or Bad Mom Conversations

Watch my TV show Parental Discretion with Stefanie Wilder-Taylor

Follow me on Twitter, Please!

Check out my personal blog Baby On Bored

Keep up with what I’m doing by liking my Facebook  page

Listen to my podcast For Crying Out Loud

 

 

 

Tagged as: , , , ,

Use a Facebook account to add a comment, subject to Facebook's Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Your Facebook name, profile photo and other personal information you make public on Facebook (e.g., school, work, current city, age) will appear with your comment. Learn More.