I just watched this video from Ali Wentworth about her decision to have plastic surgery, and I just want to give her a huge high five. Because, honestly. Yes. Plastic surgery is just the topic…and I don’t care about plastic surgery either way… but it’s just so clearly refreshing to see someone be all whatever, this is what I’m doing, and I’m going to tell you about it. This is the essence of the shift in media, right here. As the counterbalance in the photoshopped age of perfectionism, this is the movement of people who are tired of being afraid to admit insecurities/flaws/troubles/anxieties/etc. (because, hi, we all have them) and to talk openly about their real experiences about what’s really happening.
On the other hand, really? C’mon. Is nothing sacred? These are our bodies, people! Shouldn’t we leave them alone! And if we don’t, shouldn’t we feel shame about our own feelings of inadequacy? Shouldn’t we embrace our imperfection by not caring about all these elements of imperfection. Shouldn’t we just get over it and love ourselves and all our flaws/troubles/anxieties just as we are?!
Okay sure, good in concept, but by this logic, we should never color our hair, or shave our legs, get manicures, eyebrow waxes, or spray tans. I’ve not done any form of plastic surgery, but I’ve sure as hell done all these things. A lot. And straight up, I don’t really see much conceptual difference in any of this and plastic surgery…except for levels of invasion and price. I also don’t see any real difference in getting plastic surgery and getting tattoos. Why is one taboo? Because of society? Trend? Habit? Fear?
This is what confuses me most…and I think as women, we’re weirder about it than anyone. We are super hard on each other. We are even harder on ourselves. And, to top everything off, we live in this unusually off-balanced time. Our probabilities for betterment exceed our capabilities for processing them. There are drugs to cure anxieties and depressions, but we feel less-than for taking them. There are procedures to change things that haunt us, but we feel shame for using them. Hell, we’re still giving people a hard time for taking medications as 7-pound objects shoot out of our vaginas (Me? I gave birth in my home without any medication…it’s such a shame that you decided to go the hospital/epidural route. How sad for you and your baby.*) But in this day (and country) that we live in, we have options to consider. The results are swift. And if you want to do it, go for it…
Or, as we say around here, “Seriously y’all, fix that shit.”
But know, what doesn’t fix you can make you much, much worse. We’ve all seen the good-intentions-gone-very-wrong lips, breasts, faces. If it doesn’t work for you, it’s very clear to us all. And speaking of that…
Please. For the love of everyone, don’t try to hide it. Because it’s obvious. That’s the reason you’re doing it to begin with, right?…for an obvious change. If you don’t want the change to be visible, why spend the money, energy and recovery time? Own it.
And then talk about it. The good, the bad, the pretty ugly…all of it. That way, we’ll have the whole story when it comes time for us to consider the option.
*For the record, I gave birth to a child in a hospital during a Category 4 Hurricane in this make-shift day surgery area, and I was under the influence of some lovely drugs. It was an emergency C-section, I had a spinal, and a Resident who had been a doctor for about 5 minutes delivered my child. It was not what I had planned, but it was seriously fantastic, and as a result, I have a crooked scar and a six-year-old son.