It’s All Your Mom’s Fault You Have These Kids

What???It’s not even really her fault that I have ALL of them.  JUST ONE.

That child!

The one that’s like me in every way, shape and perfecting-sarcasm roll of her eyes.

Her beautiful deep chocolate eyes.

Eyes that (upon occasion) I want to send skidding across the kitchen floor.

Eyes that LOOK just mine.

But I have no idea where she learned that eye-roll.

One day when I was being a non-eye-rolling bastion of perfect attitude my mother said “I HOPE YOU HAVE A CHILD JUST LIKE YOU SOMEDAY!”

And I scoffed.

Why wouldn’t anyone want more of me to go around?

Now, as an adult, a parent of three, the mom to myself, I sometime call my mother.

From under a pile of wrapping paper in my closet, hiding waaaay in the back.

Sobbing.

While my mother laughs uncontrollably.

Grandmother, vengeance is yours.

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