Previous Post Next Post

Babble Voices

With

John Cave Osborne

Connect with John

John Cave Osborne is a writer whose work has appeared on such sites as Babble, TLC, YahooShine, and the Huffington Post. He was also referenced by Jezebel one time, but he’s pretty sure they were making fun of him. While he’s name dropping, it’s only fair to point out that Ashton Kutcher tweeted one of John’s YouTube videos, but it may have only been because Ashton felt sorry for him. After all, John went from carefree bachelor to father of four in just 13 months thanks to marrying a single mom, then quickly conceived triplets. Since then, he and his wife have added one more to the mix, a little boy they named Grand Finale. They all live chaotically in Knoxville, TN with Briggs the dog.

Brought to you by

The 7 Phases of a Chuck E. Cheese Visit

By John Cave Osborne |

My daughter recently attended a party at Chuck E. Cheese, and during that party, I came to grips with something: I loathe Chuck E. Cheese with a white hot and eternal hatred. Why? Because of the transformation virtually every child undergoes while there. It’s unbearable.

Like many of you, I’ve witnessed this transformation time and time again. Only this last time, instead of turning away as I am wont to do, I examined the metamorphosis as closely as possible in hopes that I might at least better understand it. And in so doing, I’ve identified seven different phases that occur during a typical visit. Here they are in chronological order:

nggallery template=’carousel’ id=’9′

/
Your Kids Plus Chuck E. Cheese's: 7 Phases They'll Undergo

The dipping of the toe

Hesitancy accompanies most children when they first set foot on the Chuck E Cheese game floor. Which should come as no surprise, as during these initial moments they're desperately trying to find their niche within this exciting, new world. Accordingly, many transcendental issues must be carefully considered. Am I a skee-baller? Or am I better suited at whacking the hell out of those moles that keep popping up?
Photo Credit

Top Photo Credit

Read more of JCO Multiplied
Follow me on Facebook and Twitter
Read me on YahooShine and AimingLow
Check out my personal blog over at JohnCaveOsborne(dot)com

More on Babble

About John Cave Osborne

john-cave-osborne

John Cave Osborne

John Cave Osborne is a writer whose work has appeared on such sites as Babble, TLC, YahooShine, and the Huffington Post. John went from carefree bachelor to father of four in just 13 months after marrying a single mom, then quickly conceived triplets. Since then, they have added one more to the mix, a little boy they named Grand Finale. Read bio and latest posts → Read John's latest posts →

« Go back to Babble Voices

Use a Facebook account to add a comment, subject to Facebook's Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Your Facebook name, profile photo and other personal information you make public on Facebook (e.g., school, work, current city, age) will appear with your comment. Comments, together with personal information accompanying them, may be used on Babble.com and other Babble media platforms. Learn More.

7 thoughts on “The 7 Phases of a Chuck E. Cheese Visit

  1. [...] HERE to read The 7 Stages of a Chuck E. Cheese Visit. (You can thank me [...]

  2. liz says:

    Love, love, love this post! Everything I’ve every thought about that loathesome establishment and more. Can’t tell you how glad I am that 1) my children spent very little time there, thus preserving a sliver of my sanity, and 2) that they are now all too old to really feel comfortable about asking to to there. Woohoo! There should probably be a support group for those who survived the Chuck-E-Cheese years. Someone needs to design t-shirts…

  3. April says:

    Funny article. We only try to go to CEC early on a weekday morning. They open at 9 and there won’t be anyone but us there. So it becomes a more pleasant and less terrible experience. We won’t go there on weekends unless we are attending a party. I almost got into a fight with an old man there on a weekend (long story).

    My husband and I and my boyfriend before that would go to CEC and try to be stupid and act like kids and play the games and eat pizza. I saved all the tickets from those trips. So I have bags and bags of tickets and we have not used them yet. I am saving them for one day to whip them out and let them get a huge prize. I am waiting till they are old enough to really appreciate it.

    I actually don’t push the whole ticket part of the experience. They like getting the tickets from the ticket eating machine, but I only let them them cash in a couple because they are 4 and can’t count yet. So we save them. I refuse to spend money to get a prize. No way.

  4. Ann says:

    This is such a creative take on the experience!

    I don’t look forward to this inevitable phase, however, my toddler has a blast on the school bus climber/slide which does not require any tokens (this appartus is not at all locations though). CEC has been a decent option to meet friends on very hot days, and is calmer during weekday mornings, especially during the school year. The location near us (Boston area) seems to be very clean and well-maintained. The food is OK, beating my very low expectations. I am also saving any tokens & random tickets that we get for the future as well. I do appreciate their security measures as well.

  5. David Lewis says:

    actually there is a video and singing and the stuffed mouse, so there is a Wayne Newton-like personallity, and i hate their song!

  6. Amy says:

    Don’t forget the 8th and final phase…ILLNESS!!!

    We refer to it as Chuck E. Disease!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *.

Previous Post Next Post

The Daily Babble