I have something to say about vacations. I should know, too, because I don’t take nearly enough of them. That’s probably why I end up making lists during my Summer Vacation of things I’m going to accomplish and do during my break. But what I really want, what I long for during the most stressful parts of working and parenting, is that dream vacation. I have to ask myself what that is and, honestly, I can break it down to 3 simple parts:
1. White sandy beaches with blue water so clear that you can see the bottom of the ocean (so, uh, TROPICAL!)
2. Someone to cook incredibly delicious meals and bring me an endless stream of fruity cocktails
3. Wherever I stay it should be better than where I live – a paradise
And look…I should know better. I’m not one for escaping my reality because it’s a pretty good reality. We have a nice home and my bedroom has an en suite bathroom and I dreamed of one of those for years. It got tiresome sharing one full bathroom with my children when they were smaller because I can’t recall ever peeing by myself because someone always wanted to get in there the same time as I was. My state is landlocked and I’ve only seen the ocean twice in my life so far. The food part I’m not so concerned about because my boyfriend, The Cuban, is a phenomenal cook who loves to experiment in the kitchen. So, we eat well at home and I might be disappointed that the food’s not as good as it is at home.
But I’m jealous when I see other people’s vacation photos or hear that they’re taking a trip to The Maldives or that they’re touring Europe. That’s why I make my lists of things to do near my home so that I don’t feel like I’m missing something. Like I’ve done something with my time off that’s worth something. Last year I got my first passport ever and I still haven’t used it or had time to go anywhere with it. But I want to so badly.
As summer goes on and we come up on that middle-finger-to-England holiday known as the Fourth of July to most Americans, I am struck by how my jealousy even creeps into such things as the pressure of throwing a good party on the 4th. Come on, Internet. That’s enough piling on and making me feel guilty about not going anywhere.
Someone else feels this way, too, right? Some of you overworked parents and tired moms can relate to this, can’t you?
Here’s the thing: the reason I know better is that someone once told me that you shouldn’t long for a vacation anywhere if your home isn’t what you want it to be. That we are to make our lives be the vacation we’d like to live. Good mantra I suppose, but fairly difficult for this single mother to figure out what with making sure I have to pay bills and take out the trash and make sure the dog gets in her evening walk. I’m achieving just a little of this zen vacation right now as I am starting to relax and stay in my yoga pants all day (you guys! it’s pretty great!). That doesn’t mean that the dream vacation I’ve always wanted isn’t something for which I’m still reaching. I am.
Maybe I should just focus on relaxing and slowing down. That ought to be enough.
But, hey, Brits. I would still totally hop a plane and visit you if I could. For now, I’ll eat something with blueberries, strawberries, and Cool Whip while I light up some lame sparklers up this week and celebrate our independence as a country. No hard feelings, okay?
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