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Nothing Says “I love you” Like Poop

I love waking up and heading downstairs to start the ole caffeine drip.  Actually, scratch that.  I don’t love waking up, especially to an alarm clock that’s set way too early.  But I do love the walking downstairs part.  Actually, no scratch that too.  I seem to have aged a lot in the past year or so because now, when I wake up, my feet and ankles are so stiff and sore that walking downstairs is a pain, and I’m pretty sure I look like an arthritic penguin when I do.  But I love seeing what my kids have left me once I get down there. On any given day, I’m bound to be surprised and delighted by the little notes my kids leave around the kitchen. 

Lexi and Brooklyn especially, are known for leaving sweet messages on Post-its in random places around the house.  While my parents were visiting, a few notes from Brooklyn appeared stuck to the kitchen cabinets.  They read, “I love Mom” and “Mom and Brooklyn” and were decorated with little hearts.  Is there anything sweeter than a random reminder that you’re very much loved?  Such little notes and pictures never fail to make me smile.  I mean, it’s pretty darn cool being the object of your child’s greatest affection (You have to enjoy it now because when they hit their teens, you’ll become the dumbest person in the family and they’ll be certain the only goal in your life is to ruin theirs.)

But the other day, I discovered a different kind of note.  Not a cute, flowery, “I love you, Mom” kind of note.  Nope.  I found some notes from Clay.


  • Ticket: have you seen my poop pet? 1 of 4
    Ticket: have you seen my poop pet?
    I shudder to imagine what a poop pet is, but I'm pretty sure I haven't seen it.
  • I have my poop missing 2 of 4
    I have my poop missing
    I can't imagine how one could have their poop go missing. I like the little "stink waves" emanating off the poop though.
  • more missing poop 3 of 4
    more missing poop
    I'm so glad he put these "Lost Poop" posters up all over the house. You know, just in case someone happens along some stray poop - they'll know it belongs to Clay.
  • good poop 4 of 4
    good poop
    I just shake my head (and wonder how long this poop phase is going to last). Maybe I should start saving for therapy. Hmmm, help me out and buy my books!

Buy my books, now available in English as well as the original Blatvian!

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