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Sarah Braesch lives in the D.C. metro area with her husband, boy/girl twins and two very loud cats. Sarah blogs at Sarah and the Goon Squad, Draft Day Suit and various other places. Her confessional blog, Sarah and the Goon Squad, documents the everyday life of raising a family in a way that is both empathetic and hysterical.

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What do you do with the Baby Teeth?

By Goon Squad Sarah |

ATTENTION TOOTH FAIRIES OF THE WORLD: I have a question for you.

What do you do with the baby teeth?

I will tell you my scandalous answer right now.

I throw them away.

It is a true story. I throw my kids’ teeth right into the trash can. One time I even did it at a hotel, which felt really weird, but what else was I going to do with it?

My mom kept our teeth. I know she did because one time I found them and I have to say – it was really creepy.

I understand that our natural instinct as parents is to hold on to things that will remind us of their childhood, but might I recommend school pictures or report cards?

Really, if you keep all those teeth where do you put them? Are you making a necklace? Do you bronze them? Do you bleach them before you put them away, because sometimes the tooth still has some gore on it. I suppose it isn’t that weird with one kid, but if you have five kids you could end up with like 100 teeth. I’m pretty sure if anyone opened up a drawer and found 100 baby teeth they would assume you had a Gacy thing going on and start digging up your basement.

Not only don’t I want people digging up my subfloor, I don’t really want teeth. I mean, I like the ones I have in my mouth, but I don’t need extras lying around the house.

I am not one of those parents that is skeeved out by teeth. I know moms and dads that get grossed out watching their kids mess with their baby teeth. I will put my hand in my son’s mouth and wiggle around the loose ones. It didn’t bother me when my neighbor got off of the bus and said “Hey Sarah! Look!” and she put her tooth right in my hand. I said, “Cool! Congratulations.” and then I gave the tooth back to her because again, I don’t want any more teeth.

Am I a bad parent for throwing my kids’ teeth away? Maybe. But I usually remember to put a dollar under their pillow on the appropriate day.  I might be discovered as the Tooth Fairy if my kids read this post, but I will never be outed when a child runs across a baggie of baby teeth.

Now seriously, those of you who keep them. What do you do with the baby teeth?

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About Goon Squad Sarah

goonsquadsarah

Goon Squad Sarah

Sarah Braesch lives in the D.C. metro area with her husband, boy/girl twins and two very loud cats. Her confessional blog, Sarah and the Goon Squad, documents the everyday life of raising a family in a way that is both empathetic and hysterical. Read bio and latest posts → Read Sarah's latest posts →

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14 thoughts on “What do you do with the Baby Teeth?

  1. daniel says:

    I can’t be in the same room when my kids mess with their loose teeth. I get creeped out, and I freely admit it. My wife keeps all the baby teeth, and I wish she would throw them away.

  2. lovelhyn says:

    i dont what the hell you were talking; about, there’s a lot of topics that give enterest to the viewers but, how will you mixed this with BABY TEETH! now, do you heat your kid? or dont have any? those are cute little angels that GOD’s precious gift to the parents who both love being a couples. im not a parent but i respect my parents next to GOD, He loves little childrens a symbol of PURITY.

  3. Roberta says:

    I’m pitching ‘em. Once they fall out, they’re like nail clippings or shed hair as far as I’m concerned. They served their purpose, no need to keep them.

  4. jonniker says:

    My dad gave mine to me in a baggie when I had my daughter. Whatever you do with them, I recommend it not be that.

  5. Issa says:

    I am concerned for @lovelhyn. Ahem.

    I toss teeth. Then again…I um don’t do the tooth fairy thing. Or I haven’t so far. My oldest was creeped out at the thought and so I just never did it. My seven year old hasn’t lost any teeth yet, so we’ll see what happens when she does. The thought of a baggie of teeth freaks me out. It’s something you’d see on Criminal Minds or something.

  6. Melissa says:

    I throw them out. Sometimes, it’s late and I’ve almost forgotten to do the fairy thing and so I just set it on my dresser until a month later and I find it and eww… toss. I can’t wait to be outed because I SUCK at being the tooth fairy. Once I forgot to do it two nights in a row for the same tooth! I blamed the weather (super windy) and late hour at which she lost the tooth…she’s 9. It’s almost over right? And then we start again with the 4yo.

  7. norm says:

    I put’em in a bottle of Coke out in the garage …

    No, really, I keep running across them deep in the back of my underwear drawer and screaming in surprise. You’d think, after 20 years, I’d stop being surprised.

  8. erin says:

    i knew a woman who had the teeth put onto a charm bracelt…yeah…gross.

  9. Korinthia Klein says:

    I always have my kids put their teeth into a sandwich bag before putting them under their pillows so they are easier to fish out in the night. Then I toss the bags in my dresser on my way back to bed. There are about a dozen teeth in bags mixed in with my socks and underwear and I don’t intend to keep them or do something precious with them, but for now they kind of crack me up when I’m getting dressed.

  10. Kendra says:

    My mom also kept some of our baby teeth. I was not prepared for finding them in her jewelry box later. I just pitched my daughter’s first tooth last week. I’m not grossed out by teeth or gore, but I don’t need something that’s been in her mouth to hang on to for the rest of my life. That’s just weird.

  11. Steph @ DairyFreeOmnivore says:

    I honestly do not know what we do with them. My husband plays Tooth Fairy because I am about as graceful as a bull in a china shop and usually wake them up. I think we kept our oldest daughter’s first in a special silver box we were given as a baby gift. Our middle daughter swallowed her first so no need to worry about that one! I am the mom who gets totally creeped out by teeth- wiggling, playing with them, pulling them- gives me a willies. So I let my hubs handle that.

  12. amyp says:

    My husband does the same ziplock thing as Korinthia Klein, and had quite a collection of them in the back of his sock drawer. I finally asked him what we might be keeping them for, and he really had not a clue. So we throw them away now. The last thing my kids need is the burden of a bunch of creepy souvenirs being presented to them once they reach adulthood.

  13. [...] The jig is up. The news is out. I told my kids that I was the Tooth Fairy. [...]

  14. Beth says:

    When my daughter lost her first tooth, I asked myself the question, “Would I want to have my own baby teeth? Would I have wanted my Mom to save them and give them to me as an adult?” The answer: “NO!” Therefore, I throw my kids’ teeth away too.

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