I Don’t Want To Go To Paris
Hey, it's the Eiffel Tower. I need a nap.
Can we be honest? I don’t love traveling. There I said it. Before you write me off as an uncultured, provincial Los Angeleno, understand that I like the idea of foreign countries; I just get very nervous being out of my element. Because of this, traveling too far makes me feel uptight and unrelaxed which is hardly the goal of being on vacation. Am I right?
Years ago, many years ago, on my last official vacation, I went to France and Italy with my husband (before we were married) and I spent an inordinate amount of time in tears over strangers staring us down in Paris, mean hotel staff, getting dirty looks for tipping too much, and coming very close to getting stranded in a freezing train station trying to get from Paris to Florence. I would’ve paid big money to miss eating a ham sandwich at top of the Eiffel Tower to have just lain around on a beach somewhere sunny.
For my next vacation I want to lie around – a lot.
I don’t want to figure out the exchange rate of the Euro to get my morning cup of coffee. For that matter, I want a cup of coffee not an espresso or café latte. In a lot of cities, no one is interested in giving you coffee especially in Italy where much like how undercover narcotics agents have to do a little blow to get in with the drug dealers, you have to drink espresso if you want to be trusted. It’s too much work!
Look close. Can you see me?
This is why I want to go on a cruise. I want a vacation where all the heavy lifting is done for me, where I can wake up and not worry about the itinerary. I want to see beautiful sights while laying out by a pool and being served chicken wings and Diet Coke (yes, of course I’d rather have a margarita but that’s not how I roll anymore). I want my kids to be so entertained in the Kid’s Club that they don’t want to join me in the casino no matter how much I beg. I want all my meals to be as easy as walking to whichever onboard restaurant I am in the mood for that moment. I don’t want to eat French food if I don’t feel like eating French food which I pretty much never feel like eating unless it’s a croissant. Can Paris offer me that? I don’t think so.
I want vending machines.
I want time to read. I want to get a pedicure with a little diamond on my big toe.
I don’t want to have to pack comfortable shoes because I’m going to be doing a ton of walking. I don’t particularly care for walking! I’m also not a huge fan of sightseeing unless I can do it from a chaise lounge.
But, after a few days of serious decompression I could be talked into going ashore and picking up some knick knacks in Mexico or somewhere else exotic. Maybe I’ll order a fish taco from a street vendor because I’m crazy like that! But then I want to get back on the ship. I’m not interested in having to figure out what hotel I’ll be staying in that night. I want to take a nap and then go dancing or to a show. Are you getting how badly I need to go on this cruise? I swear I’m going to make this happen very soon. Who’s with me? Let’s do this! Group trip! Where are we going?
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My parents feel the same way about travel — it’s great in theory, but a pain in reality. I enjoy it, but I think there are two types of vacations: 1) relaxing vacations and 2) stimulating vacations. Anything where you need a map the whole time is a stimulating vacation, and I agree these are more taxing than relaxing sometimes. Don’t you hate coming home from a vacation and thinking, “I need a vacation from my vacation!”
Wow, I am just your complete opposite! I love to be out and about and doing things on vacation… although I will admit that it’s tiring and I don’t really refer to it as “vacation,” I call it travel. “Vacation” does really call to mind sandy beaches and sunshine, and I enjoy that as well… but only for a day or two! After that, I start to go a little stir crazy. Oh well, to each her own :) Enjoy your cruise!
For me it depends. Both relaxing and sightseeing can be fun…depending on where and who you’re with. I think you can go either way with a cruise.
Honestly, Europe is too much for a short and quick summer vacation. I much rather take a week off on the sea and save Paris or anywhere else in Europe for a week+ vacation. Have fun on your cruise!
thats sad to hear you had such a tough time in Paris before–ive been and i loved it! BUT- that said…i dooo love me a good cruise! now that is a for-sure way to get some relaxation! (AKA exactly what i need!)
I’m in on the group cruise trip! Somewhere sunny, anywhere sunny, where all I have to do is snap my fingers and cabana boy brings me my heart’s desires while my kid is otherwise entertained sounds like heaven on earth :-)
I’ve never been further than Mexico and as much as I love the idea of travel, I get anxious about the logistics. This is exactly why I think a cruise would be the best option for me as well. Vacations are supposed to be relaxing and I know a trip to Paris would be anything but relaxing for me.
Yes! This. I don’t want to need a vacation to recover from my vacation.
The trick may be to schedule a vacation within a vacation. Too much of a whirlwind experience can be too much. When we were in France we were lucky enough to stay with friends. We could venture out into the city, then come home and just hang out. Even in countries where we didn’t know people it helped to factor in a down day to just be. It helps!
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We love all kinds of vacations and go on different ones each year. But then it’s a breeze with just one child, I can’t even imagine leaving the house with three! I love experiencing the trip through our son’s eyes. No Europe yet, but perhaps when he’s a little older. A cruise probably would be perfect for you. We are thinking of doing a Disney one next year. Probably a good idea would be for you to leave the twins in their wonderful daycare all day and all night (ha!) and enjoy your older daughter, who sounds pretty well behaved. She probably needs some alone time with her parents, just some nice one-on-one attention, playing in the pool with you or whatever, without having to share you with her tantruming sisters.
Paris is similar to when I travel to NY — its not a vacation, it’s more work than anything! With 4 kids, I totally agree with you! You need a vacation after the vacation! Sometimes I wonder when I return home from a trip if it was worth it but a cruise — it sounds so much easier! Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed reading your thoughts!
Hi Dennis, I am not sure how that happened, but many thanks for bringing it to my attention, I’ve edited the weblink to be one particular backlink
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