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The Things a Mother of Twins Will Never Forget About the First Year

I held my sister’s baby when he was six months old and my dad said, “Aren’t they so sweet at this age?”

“I don’t remember this age, dad,” I said.

It was half true and half not true. I forgot a lot of it because I had twins and was so exhausted simply breathing, eating, and showering (with crying babies within constant arm’s reach) that the burden of trying to remember any of it weighed heavier than the diaper genie after 20 diapers a day. Heavier than lugging two car seats plus double diaper bag plus groceries for this double-breastfeeding-half-starved mother.

So, in order not to forget the things I might have forgotten, I wrote them down. I still write them down when they come in fading flashes as today my twins now turn 13 (evidenced in the old, out-of-date photos below).

Here are the moments mothers of twins will never forget.

 

  • The Discovery 1 of 7
    ultrasound twins

    That moment at the ultrasound when you wondered, briefly, why your baby had two heads. The nurse pauses, says, ‘um, let me call the doctor.' And you are left to stare and wonder, in awe and joy and terror.

  • The Belly 2 of 7
    baby bump

    That moment when you announce to your best friend that you are pregnant and you have two basketballs under your shirt and it takes her a full five seconds of stunned silence to start cheering. This is less than half-way there. Twin bellies tend to turn into watermelons on steroids.

  • The Birth(s) 3 of 7
    twin deliveries

    That moment when, after you have pushed out one baby or had one baby taken out, you realize that there is another one still inside. It still needs to come out and all you want to do is see the first one and go to sleep. Mine came out both ways. Yeah.

  • The Mix-Up 4 of 7
    look a like twins

    That moment when you fear you have gotten them confused. Until your husband reminds you that one has a penis and one has a vagina and you'll always be able to tell them apart. Or that moment when you really have mixed them up, if you have identical twins.

  • The Labor After the Labor 5 of 7
    twins in a swing

    That moment at the Mall of America when you are nursing one, rocking one, and are surrounded by stinky diapers. An old woman shouts at you to, "Get a real job." And you wonder if there is anyone in the universe working at their 'real' job as hard as you are working at this.

  • The Sleeping 6 of 7
    sleeping twins

    That moment when they are both quiet, clean, fed, and coo-ing or sleeping. At.the.same.time. You catch the briefest glimpse of the future. It is far, far away. But I promise, one day you will wake them up (in other words, one day you will have your revenge).

  • The Love 7 of 7
    great grandmothers and twins

    That moment when you realize that twins mean more food, diapers, more waking hours but they also mean more baby to go around, more baby to love.

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