Awhile ago, I wrote a post about the things I had learned from running. I learned things like:
Running Supposedly Curbs the Appetite
I was hungry before my run. I was still hungry after my run. The only difference was that I was too weak and sore to lift my hand to my mouth. I considered asking my kids to fill a dog bowl with food and set it on the floor so I could crawl over and plunge my face in it, but I was afraid they’d take a picture and Instagram it. Instead, I skipped dinner. That wasn’t a good idea. Later that night, while driving to pick up my daughter from a friend’s house, I hallucinated that I saw armadillos cross the road, and I fantasized about eating them. I really should’ve gone with the dog bowl idea.
My attempt at running ended shortly after it began. Like 3 miles after it began. I soon went back to walking
like a sane person. I like walking. I like that I can still get some great cardiovascular exercise. I can raise my heart rate and break a sweat without killing my knees. When I walk, I smile. When I run, my face looks like Jeff Dunham’s Walter. When I run, I’m too busy trying not to throw up to notice much of anything around me. When I walk, I can slow down and look around, taking time to smell the roses, as it were. Here are some of the things I learned while walking (and none of them include eating armadillos, the other, other, other white meat.)
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