A few days ago I posted 14 photos of my first foster son who was adopted… but not by me. I didn’t expect that retelling the events would get me so down, but it did. So today, I’m reversing the tone and adding more photos that celebrate our time together.
Most of these photos are taken from the time that he and his mom lived together in a residential drug treatment program, sometimes known as Mommy-and-Me rehab. Most moms in the program sent their babies home with family for the weekend. When my first foster son’s mom asked me if I would substitute one weekend, I was delighted.
If one of my daughters “Sandy” is returned to her mom, I still have the dream of being her only foster parent should she ever again re-enter the system. My wish is for everyone involved in the decision making of foster care placements to take the same course that their associated foster parents take. I believe that if the social workers, attorneys, and even judges take the course, everyone would understand the importance of shared parenting, even after foster care, in order to provide sustainable permanency that is community-based.
In other words, all of the counselors, case workers, and attorneys will be gone when the case is over. According to professional standards, contact should cease unless they continue to be providers. Who’s left? Who’s the most committed community resource left for the family? The foster parents. Something the Model Approach to Partnership and Parenting (MAPP) trains us to be and the Annie E. Casey Foundation advocates.
Also from Rebecca: