14 Ways to Spot the Parent of a NewbornDevan McGuinness
I almost forgot what life was like when you have a newborn at home. It’s kind of isolating, a whole lot loud and a little confusing as you balance the frustrations of no sleep and a profound love for this new little life.
I have been living this crazy newborn life for seven weeks now and, oh, how those memories have quickly fled back. I think I remember myself being far more graceful with all the sleep-deprivation and late nights with colic than I am now, but so much of this seems familiar and I’ve realized that it’s just kind of the way the “fourth trimester” seems to go for many people.
There are some families who fly through the fourth trimester and just seem to make it look effortless and graceful. But if you’re anything like me, being a parent of a newborn is easy to spot.
1. Their cart at the grocery store has more than one dry shampoo.
2. They’re at the school bus drop-off in their slippers, not their shoes.
3. You watch them take a drink of the coffee creamer while putting their coffee mug in the fridge.
4. They have all the late-night infomercial gadgets in their house.
5. They’re often seen standing and swaying gently from side-to-side.
6. A soft song instantly puts them to sleep.
7. Two minutes after you told them something, they’ve forgotten.
8. They have one arm, probably the left one, that’s really sore (from carrying the baby all day).
9. They look legitimately caught off-guard when they’re spoken to, in real sentences (versus baby screaming).
10. They drink more coffee than anyone you know.
11. Milk and spit-up stains, everywhere.
12. Dark circles of sleep-deprivation even the best concealer and BB cream can’t hide.
13. They seem to know a lot about all the TV shows on Netflix.
14. There’s this special kind of glow that can only be attributed to that intoxicating newborn smell.