Loading
Welcome to Babble,
Settings
Sign Out

Get the Babble Newsletter!

Already have an account? .

MENU

20 Things Motherhood in My 20s Taught Me

How to tap a keg, learned at 17. Sorry mom.

I began drinking at 14, became far too involved with boys at 15, I moved out of my mom’s house at 17, met my husband at 18, and married him shortly after 19. I had my first baby at 22, almost got divorced at 27, fell in love all over again at 28, and had my second baby at 29. I did enough living in my teenage years to make up for a lifetime of rebellion and excitement. This Saturday I leave my 20s behind and enter my dirty thirties.

My mom wasn’t even a mom until her 30s.

I’m so looking forward to my 30s, while I learned so much in my 20s, I hurt so many people. I hurt myself. I damaged myself and relationships around me and despite my best efforts to heal many of them, it just wasn’t possible. I have plans, I have dreams, and I have two feet planted very firmly on the ground. I could have never learned and grown in all the ways that I have without my babies, and I’m glad we made the choice to have babies early.

While the following are all things people can learn at any point in life, some people never learn them, or learn them too late. I’m thankful I got so many of them out of the way in my 20s so I can really enjoy what my 30s have planned for me (which at this point includes A CRUISE WITH MY HUSBAND. *ehem*).


  • I learned that no matter how unprepared I was, the maternal instincts were there 1 of 20
    I learned that no matter how unprepared I was, the maternal instincts were there
    Oh dear, that girl on the right became someone's mother. I didn't know a thing about babies, and yet once mine was placed in my arms — I began to figure things out.
  • I learned how to hug 2 of 20
    I learned how to hug
    For the longest time I didn't like hugging other people because it felt so strange to be that close to another person. I then had a hug that changed my life and it forever changed the way I hug. I'm pretty proud of my hugs, I mean the hell out of them.
  • I learned about God 3 of 20
    I learned about God
    I always knew about God, but around 18, I began to believe He was really there. During my deepest darkest struggles, I knew He was there, and having that knowledge brings so much comfort to my heart.
  • I learned younger bodies are far more resilient 4 of 20
    I learned younger bodies are far more resilient
    Having a baby at 22 was much easier than having a baby at 29. I already knew I took my younger body for granted, but nothing has made that more obvious than my second pregnancy.
  • I learned about unconditional love 5 of 20
    I learned about unconditional love
    Through my kids, I learned about the love God has for me, and after a horrible year, I learned that love really can heal all things and it's worth fighting for.
  • I learned that babies don’t keep 6 of 20
    I learned that babies don't keep
    As much as I looked forward to babies, it has gone by all too quickly. I'm so grateful I stopped and took the time to really enjoy them at each stage.
  • I learned to sleep when the baby sleeps 7 of 20
    I learned to sleep when the baby sleeps
    Talk about the most overused baby advice. But it's true. It's popular because it's true. I ran myself ragged with my first baby. Trying to do so much while she slept, I was wrecked and exhausted by the time she woke up.
  • I learned about a mother heart 8 of 20
    I learned about a mother heart
    A mother heart is one that turns away from fame, popularity, and fortune and puts motherhood first and foremost. It's a heart that knows that no other person is better for raising her children than her own.
  • I learned that being mean gets you nowhere good 9 of 20
    I learned that being mean gets you nowhere good
    There's a right way and a wrong way to handle problems and confrontations. Being mean isn't who I am and it's never gotten me what I wanted in the end.
  • I learned that nothing is more important than family 10 of 20
    I learned that nothing is more important than family
    Moving far away from family and everything I grew up with was one of the best things that ever happened to me. I learned to rely on my husband, and together, we learned to be stronger for our girls.
  • I learned that good people make all the difference 11 of 20
    I learned that good people make all the difference
    I quit surrounding myself with a grand quantity of friends and instead stuck to the quality ones. My happiness and confidence in myself skyrocketed.
  • I learned how to say no 12 of 20
    I learned how to say no
    I also know when to say too much, and I know when to ask for help.
  • I learned that babies are magical 13 of 20
    I learned that babies are magical
    I didn't grow up around babies. Sure, they were always cute but I never understood the obsession until I held my own in my arms. Now I can't get enough; I may be borderline creeper with certain babies.
  • I learned how to cook 14 of 20
    I learned how to cook
    I always knew how to cook, kind of. But nothing has made me feel more domestic and reliable than knowing how to cook for my family. It's a skill I'm so thankful I've worked on for the last 10 years.
  • I learned that stuff doesn’t amount to much 15 of 20
    I learned that stuff doesn't amount to much
    I used to find happiness in spending money and acquiring the latest and greatest stuff, but when everything else fell apart and all I was left with was stuff? I was miserable. I began working harder on the stuff that really mattered.
  • I learned a baby can never be loved too much 16 of 20
    I learned a baby can never be loved too much
    My grandma once scolded me and told me I was going to spoil my baby by holding her too much. Turns out it's absolutely impossible to love a baby too much — take that, grandma.
  • I learned how to roll with the punches 17 of 20
    I learned how to roll with the punches
    I've ended up in some pretty ridiculous situations in other states and countries ... and some have even involved poo. I've learned that freaking out doesn't do much, but knowing that it will end and there's always a way out has served me well.
  • I learned how to be okay by myself 18 of 20
    I learned how to be okay by myself
    I used to always have to be with someone, belong to someone, be talking to someone. Being alone was scary and dark. I now relish time alone and enjoy being with myself. I'm pretty fun.
  • I learned to put myself first 19 of 20
    I learned to put myself first
    Babies and kids can be never-ending vortexes of happiness and energy. I learned to step away from them and put myself first on occasion because I deserve it and am such a better mom (and wife) when I have moments to myself. It's not selfish, it's survival.
  • I straightened my $7%@ out 20 of 20
    I straightened my $7%@ out
    I've seen people much older than me still dealing with things from their teens and twenties. I've been able to stop blaming my childhood, my parents, and my experiences for my difficulties and have begun to embrace them as the most spectacular learning experiences I could have ever had.

Find more Casey on her blog, twitter, Pinterest, Flickr and facebook.

Also Babbled:

Half a year in 20 Photos.

Confessions from postpartum and anxiety survivors.

FacebookTwitterGoogle+TumblrPinterest
Tagged as:

Use a Facebook account to add a comment, subject to Facebook's Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Your Facebook name, profile photo and other personal information you make public on Facebook (e.g., school, work, current city, age) will appear with your comment. Learn More.

FacebookTwitterGoogle+TumblrPinterest