5 Embarrassing Things I Never Imagined I'd Do as a Parent

baby on belly
It’s All Worth It, Right?

Remember before you had kids you would see a parent dragging her kid by the arm out of the mall, and you thought, “Geez, I will NEVER be like them?”


Here are some things I’ve done that I never would’ve deemed acceptable pre-baby. These things are more gross things than they are parenting styles, but still.

1. Sometimes I wipe my babies’ noses with my t-shirt. I remember seeing my friend do this about four years before I had kids and I thought to myself: “That is so (bleep)ing gross, I will never do that.” Well, I still think it’s revolting, but I do it.

2. I spend an inordinate amount of time in my pajamas and specifically, braless. This was something I did not expect, even though it seems the most obvious thing ever. I don’t find going without a bra very comfortable, but some days it’s just too complicated and time-consuming to actually go put one on.

3. I gladly allow my toddler to spit out his food (or whatever other gross chewed up thing might be in his mouth) into my hand. This is both a public and a private practice.

4. I occasionally leave the house without brushing my hair…or my teeth. I do this because I forgot, not on purpose. The hair? Meh. But, the teeth–I should be arrested–or at the very least, be given a bottle of mouthwash to keep in my car.

5. I whipped out my boob in front of the plumber. Need I say more?

I’m sure this list will just get longer and longer with every passing day.

What kinds of gross stuff have you done now that you’re a parent?