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7 Baby Fashion Faux Pas I Won’t Apologize For

What’s hot in baby fashion this summer? Whatever it is, I can tell you that Scrunchy Face probably isn’t wearing it.

I ‘m impressed by parents who consistently keep their little ones looking spiffy in frilly this and color-coordinated that. As much as I would love to clothe Scrunchy Face well enough to qualify for a spread in Vogue, at this point he’d be a better candidate for Mismatched Socks Monthly. When I’m dressing him, I tend to grab whatever’s at the top of his dresser drawers and go. I pretty much do the same with Saucer Eyes and have since he was a newborn.

Aren’t traditions nice?

My rule of thumb when it comes to dressing my kids is that short of a party or school picture day, any outfit is a-OK as long it’s warm, clean, comfortable and not emblazoned with potentially offensive text. (Though if someone were to buy Scrunchy Face an “I’m With the MILF” onesie, I could potentially let it slide…)

I might take greater care with my son’s attire when he’s older, but for now, while Scrunchy Face doesn’t know any better, I’m going to keep on committing baby fashion faux pas with abandon. You’re welcome to check out a few of them below as long as you promise not to sic the Fashion Police on us, because if there’s one look I won’t approve of, it’s prison stripes.

What are your baby fashion faux pas?

  • 7 Baby Fashion Faux Pas 1 of 8
    BabyFashionFauxPasText

    We're breaking all the runway rules...and loving it!

  • Celebrating New Year’s…in April 2 of 8
    ScrunchyFaceNewYearsBib

    Wearing holiday gear only on the holidays seems wasteful, so my kids celebrate certain holidays all year-round -- sartorially, at least. While on a stroll one lovely spring day, Scrunchy Face's bib wished passersby a "Happy New Year." A toast to questionable choices!

  • Spelling Trouble 3 of 8
    SaucerEyesBucaneer

    Saucer Eyes is wearing a cute cap given by his grandparents, who brought it home as a souvenir from an island vacation...but shiver me timbers, matey! There be a typo atop the head of this wee pirate. (Buccaneer is spelled incorrectly.)

  • Tardy for Turkey Day 4 of 8
    SaucerEyesThanksgivingBodySuit

    Another entry in the mistimed holiday gear category: It was nowhere near Thanksgiving when this photo of Saucer Eyes was taken. It wasn't his first Thanksgiving, and it definitely wasn't his first fashion faux pas!

  • Pink Trim for My Little Prince 5 of 8
    SaucerEyesPinkRainbows

    The designer of this body suit may have had baby girls in mind, but Saucer Eyes made purple hearts and pink trim look manly, don't you think?

  • Shameless Swag 6 of 8
    SaucerEyesSwagBib

    Who doesn't love free garments, especially bibs that end up being changed about seven million times a day? The drool catcher being modeled here by Saucer Eyes came gratis from a maternity program run through the health insurance I had at the time. Does my kid look like a mini human billboard? Yes. Do I care? Nope.

  • Red and Green and Clashing All Over 7 of 8
    ScrunchyFaceXmasColors

    Christmas colors in May? Don't mind if I do!

  • Midday PJs 8 of 8
    ScrunchyFacePajamas

    Scrunchy Face keeps it breezy, Hugh Hefner-style, by wearing pajamas in the middle of the day. Don't hate on him—you only wish you could be this comfortable.

 

Don’t miss a post! Follow Alice on Twitter and as “Mildly Inappropriate Mommy” on Facebook

More from Alice:

Why Babies Won’t Remember the Stupid Things You Do (But Your Wife Will)

Rage Against the Tweeting of the Pee

The Good, the Bad and the Leaky: 7 Lessons From 6 Months of Breastfeeding

Baby, Don’t Hurt Me: 7 Ways Your Infant Can Injure You

Don’t Squish the Baby! 10 Adorable Sibling Hugs

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