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9 Valentines From My Baby

Chocolates are nice. Roses? Great. But I know what new moms really want for Valentine’s Day. (That is, besides a hot shower and a crate of wine.) They want heartfelt valentines from their babies!

My baby, unfortunately, hasn’t yet mastered writing nor is he likely to break out a lute and serenade me with “Greensleeves” any time soon. Still, if he could truly communicate his feelings, I’m pretty sure I know what he’d say. Check out these imagined Valentine’s Day messages from my baby below.


  • If My Baby Could Wish Me a Happy Valentine’s Day… 1 of 10
    If My Baby Could Wish Me a Happy Valentine's Day...

    ...I know exactly what he'd say.

  • I’ll Open My Heart to You… 2 of 10
    I'll Open My Heart to You...

    ...just as soon as I open all the cabinets in the kitchen.

  • I Love You So Much, I Want To… 3 of 10
    I Love You So Much, I Want to Share My Snacks With You...

    ...share my snacks with you -- and also the floor.

  • Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue… 4 of 10
    Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue...

    Heads up, dear Mommy, I'm throwing my shoe.

  • If My Love for You Was Drool… 5 of 10
    If My Love for You Was Drool...

    ...there wouldn't be a bib absorbent enough to hold it all.

  • My Heart Is Full… 6 of 10
    My Heart Is Full...

    ...just like my diaper.

  • I’m Not Teething… 7 of 10
    I'm Not Teething...

    ...that was a love bite!

  • Love Means Never Having to Say You’re Sorry… 8 of 10
    Love Means Never Having to Say You're Sorry...

    ...about having a little too much fun with a toilet paper roll.

  • I Love You Almost As Much… 9 of 10
    I Love You Almost As Much...

    ...as I love shoving Legos underneath the couch.

  • That’s Not Gas… 10 of 10
    9 Valentines From My Baby

    It's a real smile, just for you, Mommy! Happy Valentine's Day!


Don’t miss a post! Follow Alice on Twitter and as “Mildly Inappropriate Mommy” on Facebook

More from Alice:

7 Rules for My Elementary School Boyfriend

The New Feminists: Girls at the Toy Store

Pumping at Work: Capitol Hill Moms Have What All Breastfeeding Moms Deserve

Ruin Your Day With Breasts: Hilarious Music Video Tackles Breastfeeding in Public

That Awkward Moment When Someone Gives You a Baby Book You Already Have

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