A Detailed Account of Me Not Working Out.melissaejordan
Last week, well past midnight I sat watching TV and stopped on an infomercial for a workout video. I’ve rolled my eyes at similar videos at least a dozen times but in my vulnerable “15 pounds to go” state of mind, I found myself googling the workout video series online.
Four days later, the Tracy Anderson Method Post Baby Workout DVD was on my doorstep and I was eager to get started in the hopes of one day, possible finding my abs agains. I’ve promised myself I’m not going to beat myself up over the baby weight. This body of mine has grown and birthed two beautiful children and I’m going to cut it some slack … but I can’t deny that it would be really nice to fit back into most of my clothes again.
So today, I optimistically put on some leggings and a tank top and decided I would give the DVD a go. My husband was busy taking care of some errands around the house, Arlo was napping and my 18 month old Everly was playing with her toys – surely I’d be able to do a quick workout. (Oh, how naive of me) It went something like this:
The Warm Up: Ah, this is nice. I can totally do this. I invite Everly to join me, she sits down for two seconds, gets bored and goes back to her toys.
5 minutes in: We’re doing crunches now. Are you there abdominals? It’s me Melissa.
10 minutes in: Planks. We’re doing planks. If Tracy was in my living room she’d be standing over me and telling me how poor my form is. Everly climbs on my back. I can’t stop laughing so now she thinks it’s a game.
11 minutes in: Pause the video. Arlo has stirred from his nap and dropped his pacifier. Paci back in, he closes his eyes once more.
12 minutes in: Press play, do one leg lift.
12 minutes, thirty seconds in: “Snack mama!” Everly says with puppy dog eyes. Pause the video again.
14 minutes in: Press Play. I do one set of ten leg lifts while Everly is climbing on me. I can’t concentrate on anything Tracy is saying. Everly is laughing. I’m laughing. Arlo begins to squirm and cry again.
15 minutes in: Give up on the video. I’ve done a total of five minutes of exercise, maybe.
I suppose it was ambitious to attempt it with both kids awake. Thinking back on it today, all I can do is laugh. Ah, motherhood. I should have known better but I was excited to get back on track. I suppose my plan B is to attempt this after they go to bed at night. Somewhere between cleaning up dinner dishes, getting my blog posts up, and changing the laundry over.
I’ll figure it out… Hopefully. Eventually. Someday.
Get a jump-start on your workout: 12 Ways to Find Exercise Time!