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Facing Reality, Finding Faith and Being Thankful For The Little Things

Today was mind-blowing, heart wrenching, and just beyond words. My heart was broken today. My stomach in knots. Waiting for my littles to get home safe from school felt like an eternity.

20 children. 20 helpless children. 20 empty beds tonight. Hearts broken that will never be put back together. I can’t imagine what went on in that elementary school today. I can’t imagine the fear as 5 year olds ran for their lives. And than I thought of my very own. I can’t imagine the hurt those parents are feeling knowing that in one second their lives changed forever. I can’t imagine. 

I had a hard time watching the news. Facing the reality of this crazy world we live in. I didn’t want to turn it on. I didn’t want my girls to feel hurt like I did. I didn’t want them to see my tears. I didn’t want to face reality, but I had too. And the only thing I could do was pray. Pray for those families. Pray for those children. Pray for everyone involved. Pray for my own. Pray for all. And somehow — trying to keep the faith through it.

But quite honestly, it is hard to find faith in something like what happened today. Those parents most likely had presents ready to give and now they have empty beds. They go from Christmas shopping to planning a funeral. Devastating.

Tonight, bedtime fell out of routine as I wanted to spend that extra time together. When Grayson fell asleep, I didn’t put him down right away, I held him a little longer. I didn’t care if I had a million things to do. That time is precious. When my girls wrapped their arms around me, it was the best feeling in a long time. Each time they came to sit on my lap, snuggle or give me a kiss — I didn’t want to let them go. I thought of all the other moms out there that would never get to feel that again. And than I cried.


Adorable suspender set c/o The Snappy Sapling

I realized one thing. The only thing you can do right now in this moment is say your prayers, hug your littles tight, have faith + pray for those families. Time is so precious each day. Always remember that even on a bad day, someone else out there has it worse than you. Someone is being diagnoised with cancer. Innocent children are dying. People are hurting. Days like this make you realize the little things you take for granted each day. The little hugs, the snuggle time, endless diaper changes and sleepless nights. Sweet little things we take for granted. Little things we should now always be thankful for and feel blessed for those moments.

 My heart is heavy and my soul aches for those poor parents. When Grayson smiled back to my voice for the first time tonight, I wanted to cherish that moment forever. I thought of the parents that would never get to see that again. I spent the evening playing dress-up with him after my girls went to bed. He was practicing for an upcoming photo shoot. I had planned on catching up on emails, editing photos, scheduling posts but instead – my Friday evening was spent taking in those little memories I am blessed to have and being thankful for the time that I can never have back.

Read more from Casi & the cupcake team on cupcakeMAG + cupcakeMAG Littles. Check out Casi’s lifestyle blog where she gives readers a glimpse into her personal life + behind the scenes of all the chaos, cupcake + co.

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