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I Didn't Miss You One Bit, PERIOD.

By emily |

Dear Buddy, Old Pal, Old Friend of Mine:

Wow, what a roller coaster of a ride our relationship has been on.

Remember the first time we met? It was a spring afternoon, right before my 6th grade swim lessons. Because you wanted to hang out so unexpectedly, I had to lie and tell the gym teacher I forgot my suit.

And over the past 20 odd years, you’ve managed to spoil sleepovers, wreck short summer dresses, and even mess up the sheets with your untimely arrival.

You’ve left a trail of destruction on countless bath towels, and pretty much have destroyed my long-standing relationship with Victoria and her secrets. When you really want to get under my skin, you’ll rush in, riding a crimson wave of furry, and thwart my spontaneous attempts at any sort of horizontal play date I might be trying to schedule.

Admittedly, our relationship has gotten weird over the past 10 years. You come and go, at your leisure, and rarely let me know your travel schedule. Sometimes, you show up and hang out for a few days, and then other times you ignore me completely for months on end. Heck, there was a time a couple years ago when you would knock on my door every 10 days, and we know how that ended. His name is Gage, and he’ll be three this fall.

When you’re around, I’m short tempered and bitchy. I ache, I drag, I make up every excuse in the book to stay curled up in bed and loath you. I hate it when you invade my space.

But I get it. I know and understand your purpose in my life, and for that I’ll tolerate you. Heck, I might even respect you and your crafty agenda. You’re a necessary evil in my life, and deep down your motives are pure and good. I love you for who you are, and what you stand for. When you use your power for good and not evil, it’s pure brilliance.

But that doesn’t mean I always have to like you.

I know you won’t be around forever, and that someday you’ll just go away for good. You’ll be replace with new friends like Hot Flash and Night Sweats.

And until you’re gone for good, I’ll continue to manage your presence the best I can. I’ll ride the cotton pony, and spend my evenings eating my face off with Ben & Jerry.

Love & Oreos,

Emily

******************************************

It’s true, I got my period 2 days ago, after a 14 month hiatus. But I’m not bitter or anything…

How many months (or weeks) were you postpartum when you got your cycle back?

image credit.

Read more from Emily on her blog, DesignHER Momma. Follow along on Facebook, Twitter , and Pinterest.

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About emily

emily

emily

Emily Elling is a corporate interior designer and freelance writer. She lives in Indianapolis with her husband and four unintentionally hilarious children. Emily also blogs at her personal blog, DesignHER Momma. Read bio and latest posts → Read emily's latest posts →

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17 thoughts on “I Didn't Miss You One Bit, PERIOD.

  1. Laura says:

    Just got mine today for the first time since getting pregnant last year, my son is 7 months old, so it’s been 16 months for me. I forgot how annoying it was!

  2. SP says:

    Booo!!! And, so funny, the way you said it all.
    Usually mine comes back at month 4 or 5 postpartum. So now I’m just waiting…

  3. Alley says:

    I got mine a month postpartum… and it was hell.

  4. Ro says:

    Baby Girl is 9 months tomorrow & so glad to have not had mine yet. I feel so grateful. Sorry, but the former English teacher in me just has to point out that you must have meant “fury” not “furry” in this line: “riding a crimson wave of furry.” What an image! Hee-hee.

  5. Jess says:

    I just got mine back for the first time at 11 months pp. I was not happy to see it return.

  6. Alisa says:

    I got Mirena 6 weeks post partum. Haven’t had a period in 2 years now. I love it! The funny thing is, I bought a box of supplies expecting my next period and then I was pregnant. I wonder what the expiration date is?

  7. Lilly says:

    I got mine a week after her first birthday, so 12 months pp, but really went almost two years without a period. It was glory, and now I hate it.

  8. Carrie says:

    I wrote about this in my blog, too. Getting your period back is very emotional, especially if you are breastfeeding. http://huppiemama.com/?p=1677

  9. Lauren says:

    I was about a year of period free bliss. My daughter nursed exclusively so it kept that b*tch at bay.

    Now I’m 46 and you cannot believe how much I’m ready for friggin menopause. I wish I could convince my body, “its good, we got it! Its a wrap!”. Enough already. Bring it on!

  10. Alicia says:

    I’m 8 months PP and still fortunate not to have it yet! *knock on wood* hoping as long as I am breast feeding that evil thing will stay away :)

  11. brandy says:

    I got mine the first four months of pregnancy and got it back 1 month post! So i only had a 6 month break from it, grr and i even breastfed which i thought was supposed to make it hold off. And what makes it worse is i used to miss it for months at a time and now i get it every month stupid thing

  12. EJ says:

    My son turns 1yr the end of this month and I haven’t heard from her yet… I love not having to deal with it, but also a little weird.

  13. Preggers with no. 2 says:

    I haven’t had one for two years and three months so far! I got pregnant in March 2010, then again when my son was 10 months old (and I hadn’t got my ‘rags’ back yet). I’m 37 weeks pregnant, so it looks like it will be at least another few months yet :) woohoo! Loving the break!

  14. Nicole Rutherford says:

    Unfortunately, I have not been as lucky as some. My dear old friend returned two months pp. I absolutely did not miss it, but then again when menopause closes in (I’m only 25) I’ll be wishing for that once a month visit.

  15. Audrey says:

    My first child was 18 months old when it returned, and my second child was right at a year old when it returned.

  16. anna {girlwithblog} says:

    My son is 6 months old today, and I got my period last week. =( We are still nursing full-time, and I was really hoping it wouldn’t come back this soon!
    @anna_r
    http://www.girlwithblog.com

  17. Ann at Mundane Magic says:

    I didn’t even really have a break from mine after delivering each of our three children. (Despite long term breastfeeding.) A uterine ablation has made me a much happier person after my last child. As a bonus, I get to keep my iron and not have my clothes messed up. Win-Win in my book!

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