Baby Peony is now 10 months old and she’s just starting to think about crawling. I’d need to look back on my older daughter’s baby book to see when she started crawlin, exactly, but I’m pretty sure it was at around the 8- or 9-month mark.
That she’s not crawling thrills me, because I know from experience that when she starts moving, it’s all over.
My concern is that she’s going to skip right over crawling and join the circus sideshow. That’s because she’s figured out these bizarre-o moves that renders her something of a freak.
When Peony sees somethings she wants, like, say, my iPhone or a regular phone or a remote control or a laptop computer — basically anything with a battery that will break easily if dropped or kill her if swallowed — she will lunge for it with a sense of urgency you’d expect from someone being chased by something deadly, like a tornado or a flesh-eating human.
She gets this possessed look in her eye, because it will be hers.
She’s not crawling, but if she’s at Point A and there’s something flashy, shiny or dangerous at Point B on the other side of the room, she’ll get there. It’s hard to describe how, exactly. But she’ll get there.
Sometimes the object of her desire is less harmful physically, but psychologically, I worry. Like, when she leaps over tall buildings (or pieces of furniture whatever) to get to my Us magazine. I mean, I get wanted to flip through it. But when you’re 10 months old and fixated on the Who Wore It Best page? That can’t bode well for the future, can it?
Oh, and she’s standing herself up on everything now. So there’s that, too. So far she’s only fallen backwards once somewhere other than her crib (where she frequently falls backwards and forwards and has a nice bruise on her left cheekbone as proof).
The whole thing is utterly amusing to witness. Except, you know, when what’s she’s clamoring for is a potential agent of death. Then it’s not quite as funny.
I’m not sure if Ringling Bros. is hiring, but I’m just putting it out there that their next sideshow is right here, and is available (except during nap time).
Photo credit: Meredith Carroll