Mommy Needs a Time Out

I was beginning to think that I had this whole “two kids” thing figured out. The girls and I started to get ourselves in a routine and I even lucked out and had them napping at the same time on most days. So many of my friends told me that making the transition from one to two children was tough, but I kept thinking it was rather easy. That was until last week.

My oldest daughter, Harlan, finished with her preschool for the year and had a week break before she started camp. The week in-between her two activities meant that I would have both children at home. At the beginning of the week, I was looking forward to having both girls home and us not having to go anywhere. It would finally be a chance for us to relax and spend some quality time together, just the three of us.

On Monday, the girls were on an opposite napping schedule so I made sure to spend some extra special time with my oldest since she’s been feeling a bit neglected lately. As the week went on, the cabin fever started to settle in for all of us.

Last week the weather here in NYC was awful. It was rainy and cold almost everyday. Traveling with two girls around the city is hard enough when the sun is out; it is nearly impossible when it’s raining. Unless I absolutely have to get out of the house to get something, I won’t take both girls out in the rain.

Harlan’s picked up a bad case of terrible two’s and Avery had three vaccines for her two month check-up which resulted in a very cranky baby. By Thursday, I was beginning to get to the end of my rope. My confidence was shattered as I thought that I really couldn’t handle taking care of two girls on my own during the day. I was almost in tears at the end of each day because I was so stressed out and exhausted.

Thankfully my husband noticed that my confidence was fading and gave me a much needed time out. On Friday afternoon I left for a couple of hours to get my hair done. It was the first time I had left both girls with him, and he did an amazing job. The two hours of peace helped me regain some of my confidence I had lost during the week.

Yesterday was a beautiful day in the city. My family and I spent the morning in Central Park and then I took another time out for myself and did a little shopping. I had Avery with me, but she was sleeping the entire time, so it felt as if I was alone. It was one of the most calming couple of hours I had had in a long time. I could finally focus on myself and my needs. It definitely helped me re-charge for the week ahead.

I hope to never get back to the point I was at last week. I’ve now realized how important it is for me to get out and do things for myself. Not only does it help me, but it will also help my family (so I’m not a cranky mom and wife).

Have you ever felt like you just needed a time out? How did you take the time to do it?

Read more from Lauren at A Mommy in the City. For more updates, follow Lauren on Facebook and Twitter! Check out more of Lauren’s  Babble posts at Being Pregnant and Baby’s First Year.

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Mommy Needs a Time Out

Sending out an S.O.S

Today during a time out for my oldest son, who is rounding right out of toddlerhood and directly into smart-ass kid age… I was told I needed a time out.

“Camden!  TIME OUT!  Go to your room!”

“Mommy!  YOU need a TIME OUT!”

I almost wanted to snap back at him as quick as I could… “YES!  Mommy NEEDS a time out!” Does that mean I can lock myself in my bedroom for a time out from toddlers? Because I am in desperate need of one.

In the past month there have been a lot of changes in our home. My husband has new work hours, which means a random week day off, and one weekend day, every other week. Less daddy time for the boys and they notice. That also means less help for mommy. I am slowly working on coming to terms with it, but to say it isn’t stressful would be a lie.

On top of this, I lost my sister at the beginning of October after almost two months in hospice care. And toddlers like other predators in nature can just smell that I am off my game because of my grief. I try to mask it as much as I can, but I laid my best friend to rest at the young age of 40. There is no hiding the tears when a random song in the car comes on, or the way my face looks when the boys ask to go see their Auntie Dawn. It hurts, and they can tell.

It is hard, and I have booked myself a time out for Saturday night. Whether or not my husband decides to join, I am kidnapping one of my childless girlfriends I actually have maintained a good friendship with, and doing something I have wanted to do for a decade… See the Rocky Horror Picture Show in a theater!

I need adult time. I need time away from potty training, snacks, and juice boxes. I need a glass of wine and no whining in the background or diapers to be changed.

We all need this time, and I think my kids are starting to notice I need a good evening away!

How do you take your time out?

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