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Parenting Baby #4 But Feeling Like A First Time Mom

I’ve had a rather surprising realization as I wrangle 4 kids here at home — I feel like a first time mom with this new baby!

I’m not sure if it’s because my previous babe is now no longer anywhere near baby age at 4.5, if it’s because this baby is so different (my first girl!) and her personality is requiring all new parenting skills. Or if it’s that there are new ideas and philosophies out there, new smart ways of doing things, new research, etc. than when I last had a newborn. I lived in a completely different part of the country, had a completely different life the last time I did this.

There are also new gadgets aplenty (video monitors! want one!), and yes I certainly didn’t have an iPhone in 2007 or a freelance writing career or even really have blogs as a big resource.

Is it the world that is making me feel like this is all new, or is it just me? It might be that I’m a whole different person, having birthed a baby girl before this one. She was a stillborn and I never got to raise her or know what it was like with her as a newborn.  I was broken in two and reformed a whole new me. I’m feeling more vulnerable as this new first time parent vibe seeps into my brain and the uncertainties shake me up a bit. Because, while I’m still as relaxed as a mom of 4, I feel clueless about almost everything.

Any new-moms-but-not out there feeling this way too? Or is this just the sleep deprivation talking?

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