I am sitting alone in a coffee shop. Wait, did you hear me? I am sitting ALONE in a coffee shop. There is no baby monitor, and no scrambling to work during what will inevitably be a short nap. Just a grande iced decaf Americano and a giant slice of coconut bread by my side.
After ten months of being nearly inseparable, today is the first that that my son is awake and playing…with someone else. And I feel surprisingly okay about it.
I’ve been working on getting childcare lined up for a few weeks now, ever since my sister (who was with us for the summer) left to head back to school. As a start, one of my good friends here in Seattle offered to start watching Cullen, along with her 11-month-old, one day a week. She wasn’t sure if she’d be able to handle the two little monsters together, but she said she was willing to give it a shot. So this week was our trial run, and it seemed like it was a big success!
I dropped Cullen off right at lunch time, thinking that food and a sippy cup would be good distractions as mommy crept out the door. I prepared myself for waterworks and screams as I turned to leave. As I looked over my shoulder, I saw that he had run off with a paper towel roll and never looked back.
Sitting here working with no baby, and a solid three our window of work time in front of me, I feel like I’ve taken a time machine back to a former life I had forgotten. For a year or two, this is what I did every single day. It feels good – sort of like reconnecting with a part of me I hadn’t realized I’d missed so much.
Of course, I’m noticing that every other patron to walk through the door appears to be a young mom with a baby in an Ergo. Maybe that is the norm for this shop, or maybe I’m sensitive to it because that is usually me. Either way, I am the creepy lady in the corner smiling at all the babies. Oops.
It feels strange to know that Cullen is playing and exploring, and I don’t know this part of his day. But he couldn’t be in better hands, and I feel confident and happy knowing that he’s with an adult I trust, and a friend he loves. I’ve made it through the hurdle of day one, and I imagine it only gets easier from here.
Read more from Emily on her personal blog Daily Garnish, where she creates healthy vegetarian recipes, recaps her latest running adventures, and chronicles life as a new mom to her son and two crazy dogs. You can follow along on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest too!