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Dove Real Beauty Sketches: How we Perceive Ourselves is Our Reality

On average, I walk around thinking and feeling ugly, not monstrous, but less than average, and nowhere near beautiful. Now that I’m in my late 30′s, where the lines on my face are quickly becoming landmarks, my inner perception of my outward beauty is even less optimistic than it was five years ago. And on the occasion that I use the restroom, and after washing my hands, look up into and back at my reflection in the mirror, I think to myself eh, not as bad as I thought, then I dry my hands and go on with my day.

Admittedly, I feel “prettier” when my hair is done and I have makeup on, but because I work from home, I’m rarely in a full face of makeup let alone have my hair done. Lucky for me, my husband thinks I’m beautiful all the time but even when he tells me so, my brain immediately quips back of course he’s going to say that, he’s as biased as my mother and they’re just being nice.

So yesterday, when I clicked through a share on my Facebook feed to Adweek and read about and watched the Dove Real Beauty Sketches, I couldn’t help but tear up a little bit. In fact, I’m betting that even beyond the sad music nearly forcing emotion upon us, many women feel exactly the same way about themselves.

If you haven’t seen it yet, take a second to watch it now…

Watch the whole experience at: Dove Real Beauty Sketches and join the conversation at: #wearebeautiful

While it’s impossible for the sketch artist to be completely unbiased, or for the strangers not to criticize someone else while they’re being filmed, the message is still loud and clear: What we see in ourselves, what we find ugly, what perceived flaws we focus on, a stranger may never even notice.

And furthermore, when having a conversation with a friend or even a stranger, I doubt for one minute they are searching for your flaws when you speak with them. And maybe what you perceive as a flaw, might be what a stranger, your best friend, your children or your spouse, thinks is beautiful about you.

So I started thinking, when you “hate” a part of yourself, it’s the thing you notice most on others. For instance, if you don’t like your nose, you look at everyone’s nose and compare yours to it. But if you have no issue with your own nose, you rarely even notice other people’s noses. But why do you hate your nose in the first place?

Then I read the blurb from Dove “Only 4% of women around the world consider themselves beautiful.” And I thought to myself, We aren’t supposed to think we’re beautiful, are we? So where do we draw the line between humility and cockiness? If I told someone I thought I was beautiful {which is difficult to even type} they wouldn’t even look away before rolling their eyes at me, concluding that I was conceited, among other things, and close the book before even getting to know me.

And let me just make it clear that even when I do have my hair done and my mask of makeup on, I don’t walk around thinking I’m beautiful, I just don’t feel as ugly.

So how do women win?

I wrote this article not looking for compliments, as I just wanted to share my perspective with you… but now I’d like to give you a platform to speak on and leave your perspective in the comments below. Do you feel like you’d describe yourself the same way as the women in the video do: far less attractive than you actually are? Do you think it would be confidence boosting knowing that strangers see you as more beautiful than you see yourself? And then alternately, how are we as women supposed to feel confident about ourselves when we’re afraid of getting treated differently because of it?

Obviously beauty isn’t everything, the way we treat others and the world around us is, among billions of other factors, but do you think we would be better people in general if we thought we were more beautiful as the video states? I would love to see this experiment done on men, as I think for the most part, men would describe themselves in far less detail and better looking than they may be in reality.

Find Maegan Tintari at …love Maegan daily for style secrets, hair tutorials, fashion trends, DIYs, home decor and more. {Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram}

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