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April Magolon Sues Donald Duck For Groping Her. Let's Consider The Evidence.

donald duckDisney World, aka the happiest place on Earth, apparently wasn’t so happy for April Magolon. The 27-year-old claims that Donald Duck tried to grope her on a visit to Epcot Center last year with her two kids and her fiance, and she’s suing Disney for negligence, battery, and infliction of emotional distress. She wants $50,000 in damages.

And Donald and Pluto could be next. Magolon’s lawsuit claims that all the characters at Disney are a little touchy-feely, describing this incident as “one of a long line of continuing, long standing, similar prior incidents.”

So what’s next, Mickey Mouse being accused of murder?

I’m sure I’m not the only one sort of confused about how the whole alleged incident went down. But here’s what we do know.

Evidence in April’s favor: Donald runs around pants-less. He could be saying crazy stuff to you hard to tell with the whole duck accent. And you rarely see him and Daisy together these days.

Evidence in Donald’s favor: With those huge gloves and big head, it’s very possible he groped her without even realizing it. The Disney characters hug and touch everyone all day long. And Donald has, at the very least, some serious anger issues. He tried to take away my son’s Mickey Mouse ears on our last visit.

In all seriousness, I hope this turns out not to be true and Donald manages to duck the charges, because a sexually harrassing Disney character? That’s just fowl.

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