Her eight children may be well past the terrible-twos stage, but Kate Gosselin has plenty of memories of raising a houseful of toddlers, and the experience and wisdom to dispense advice to moms going through the same issues. That’s why fans of hers enjoy asking her questions on the “Ask Kate” channel of her website.
Not long ago, a concerned mother named Tara asked the reality-show star, “Have any of your children ever experienced aggression?” Tara has a 2-year-old daughter who has been biting, pinching and kicking, even though the mom hasn’t seen others doing the same to her.
Kate assured the mom that she’s far from alone. “Yes, I have experienced it over the years in various situations.” She explained that sibling rivalry is sometimes to blame, and that young toddlers “can’t usually express in words their frustrations and typically lash out with those behaviors.”
She then laid out her suggested do’s and don’ts for combating aggression in little ones.First step: Don’t overreact – that can prompt the child to keep on biting and kicking. “Calmly, remind her that it hurts you physically when she does those things, and the pain makes you cry.”
Second: Don’t give the child a bite or pinch of your own to “show her how it feels.” Kate says, “I have mixed feelings about that because I believe in being the example, and certainly that isn’t, lol!”
Third: Give a two-minute time-out if you think it’s necessary. “Only you know if she needs to ‘take a break’ and calm down, which is usually the case and ‘time-out’ will achieve that.”
Finally: Have a talk with the child, explaining in simple terms why hitting and biting isn’t the way to handle a frustrating situation and suggesting better ways to cope with her feelings. Kate adds that it will take a while for the child to catch on, but she will in the end.
“Bottom line is: She’s not a monster,” Kate concluded. “This is a phase she is going through and although you can’t ignore it or condone it, it will take many many conversations to show her that this is inappropriate behavior.”
Wise words from a mom who’s been there!
What do you think? Have you found a different way to deal with an out-of-control toddler?
[Photo: via PacificCoastNews.com]
Read more of Shana’s writing at Momsperiments.
And don’t miss a post! Follow Shana on Twitter!
Don’t miss the latest from Famecrawler like our Facebook page!
More on Babble: