In the latest installment of Jon Battles Kate, Plus Eight, Kate Gosselin’s lawyer, Mark Momjian, is calling Jon’s attempt to wrestle custody of the kids “pathetic.” This caught my interest. Pathetic? Of course! It’s been a rollercoaster of pathetic (the coaster creeping up to the peaks of “super-pathetic” and then crashing down to the lows of “sort of pathetic”) ever since these two split. Okay, Jon’s suit is pathetic, score one for Kate.
And here, without further ado, is the tally of “Pathetic” acts, so far, in the post-split world of Jon Gosselin, Kate Gosselin, and all of the baby Gosselini:
- Jon, almost immediately starts dating two women (Kate Major & Haily Glassman), one of whom, Major, is a tabloid reporter. Two women, plus tabloid reporter: Pathetic, pathetic, and pathetic!
- Kate cries on the Today show show. Pathetic! I understand being emotional, but please, tears are personal. Kate has eight kids who are going to have to access to this on YouTube for the rest of their lives. Why not stay home to cry on the shoulder of a friend, rather than on morning TV?
- Jon takes $180,000 from joint account, forced by Judge to return it. Pathetic!
- Police are called to their house to break up screaming brawl between Jon and Kate, two purported adults, parents to eight impressionable children. Pathetic on all sides!
- Kate joins Dancing With the Stars, apparently for the money, but surely knowing that she can’t dance. Pathetic! Like the crying, bad dancing belongs at home.
- Kate changes hairstyle nearly daily. Extensions? sure! No extensions? Why not! How about some dye! Pathetic! Pathetic! Pathetic! .
And to think, Jon is a mere 33 years old and Kate 35. Translation: expect decades more of this unflaggingly pathetic behavior. That’s good news for celebrity bloggers, but pretty pathetic for those camera-ready kids.