New Years Quotes: Funny New Year Wishes

new years quotes funny new years resolutions
New Years Quotes: Funny New Year Wishes

New Years quotes are a fun and easy way to liven up any New Year’s Eve party! There are plenty of New Year greetings that are inspirational and heartwarming, but there are plenty of New Year’s quotes that are funny too.

We’ve compiled this list of New Year’s quotes and New Year wishes that are funny to help you ring in 2011 and send a Happy New Year message!

“Youth is when you’re allowed to stay up late on New Year’s Eve. Middle age is when you’re forced to.” – Bill Vaughn

“New Year’s is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions.” – Mark Twain

“A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one Year and out the other.”  – Anonymous

“Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average… which means, you have met your New Year’s resolution.” – Jay Leno

“The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year’s Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you’re married to.” – P.J. O’Rourke

“Making resolutions is a cleansing ritual of self assessment and repentance that demands personal honesty and, ultimately, reinforces humility. Breaking them is part of the cycle.” – Eric Zorn

“New Year’s Day is every man’s birthday.” – Charles Lamb

“New Year’s Day… now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.” – Mark Twain

“Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.” – Anonymous

“Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.” – Oscar Wilde