Shaquille O'Neal Is My Idol


Shaquille O'NealI’ve never been much of a basketball fan, but I just became a huge Shaquille O’Neal fan! In an interview with Vanity Fair, the basketball superstar revealed that he has been posing as a 12 year old girl in online chat groups in order to trap online predators.

Shaq told the magazine “As long as you stay on the right side, you’ll be fine. For the last seven years, I’ve been a detective for Internet crimes against children. So if you ever see me, you know we’ve got you. If we come to your house, it’s all over. You’re going to be arrested. You’ve been having Internet conversations with me, and we’ve got all the evidence we need to take you down.”

What’s your arrest catchphrase?
My catchphrase? Like a motto?

What do you say when you’re roughing up a perp? “On the floor, dirtbag!” “Book ’em, Danno!” That kind of thing.
Well, uh. (Long pause.) My job is to be a little girl.

Come again?
I play a little girl on the Internet. So whatever name I’m going by, that will probably be my catchphrase. If I’m Tanya, then it’ll be something like, “Tanya says hello.” And they’ll be like, “Tanya who?” And I’ll say, “You don’t know no Tanya, huh? I’m Tanya. Let’s go.” And that’s when the cuffs get slapped on you.”

Um, can you just imagine the look on some creeps face when Shaquille O’Neal comes in claiming to be ‘Tanya”? I think I just became the unofficial president of the Shaquille O’Neal fan club!