Feeling overwhelmed and hopeless after word of her affair with a married man came out, “American Idol” season three winner Fantasia Barrino knew exactly what she was doing when she downed a bottle of aspirin and sleeping pills last week. Despite early reports to the contrary, the single mother’s overdose was indeed a suicide attempt.
“At that moment, I wanted out. I wanted it to be over with,” she says on a special “Behind the Music” airing tomorrow night on VH1. Her new album, “Back to Me,” is also coming out tomorrow, and Fantasia has a separate reality show on VH1.
Fantasia says that her suicide attempt was prompted by some terrible dealings with the men in her life. “I was tired of people doing me wrong, constantly, over and over again, dealing with my family – my father, dealing with men and their [expletive] – I was tired,” she says.
When she woke up in the hospital, she was at first despondent that she had been revived. But soon she got a wake-up call.
In the hospital, her nurse, Melanie, had some words of wisdom for Fantasia that helped her turn her attitude around.
“She told me what I needed to hear. And she looked at me and said, ‘You gotta get up, and you’ve gotta get out of here, ’cause you haven’t fulfilled your destiny,’” Fantasia says.
She does not say what that destiny is or mention, in the outtakes that have been released, her daughter. Part of the tragedy of a life ended so young would be that it would have also left her 9-year-old motherless.
Hopefully Fantasia really is getting the help she needs to recover, because this whole mess has been more sad than anything. Perhaps her daughter will learn the same lesson of wasted potential much earlier than her mom.