The Wit and Wisdom of Kelly Bensimon...Or Lack Thereof

Kelly Bensimon

Okay, first I should admit that I’m actually a Kelly Bensimon fan. She makes for great TV and contributes some much needed comic relief to the Real Housewives of New York City. She’s like the Shirley to Jill Zarin’s Laverne. Or like Oscar to LuAnn’s Felix. Not Hannibal Lector to Bethenny Frankel’s Clarice. One thing for sure, when she’s on screen, it’s never boring. And it’s just not her lanky presence and super short skirts  that catches our attention, it’s rather the wacky things she says.

Being a scribe, Bensimon is quite creative with her language. Check out some of the tidbits of wisdom she’s said here:

On Relationships:
“I want to be…you know…robin to someone’s batman.”

On confusing molehills with lemons:
Kelly: “You guys are making lemons into lemonade…it’s a ridiculous conversation.”
Bethenny: “No, making lemons into lemonade is making good out of something bad.”
Kelly: no, not necessarily, it’s making something into something bigger.

On envy:
“The grass isn’t always greener. It doesn’t matter how much fertilizer you have.”

On her life:
“I was kinda like Rapunzel, stuck in the castle. You know in the Hamptons…working.”

On being stuck on an Island with the other housewives:
“It’s like a witch hunt. It’s like frickin’ Hades in here.” (umm…does she mean Salem?)

Bad at charades:
After Bethenny does her best Jack Nicolson impression she says “oh my god, Al Sharpton!”

On sharing feeling:
“Free to be you and me, 1979!

On Bethenny:
“I threw up the night before I came thinking Bethenny was going to freaking kill me, because she’s tried to kill me so many times before,”

On her kids:
“When I’m talking to my child, don’t even come near me because I will claw your eyes out,”

On one night stands:
“If you had it going on like this, you wouldn’t give it away either”

On her similarity to Bethenny
“You’re brunette, I’m blond we’re very very similar.”

And last but not least always remember that “Cartwheels have no price.”

I think LuAnn said it best, “I think Kelly’s analogies are pretty interesting but sometimes I just don’t get them.”

Huffington Post compiled a hilarious collection of Bensimon highlights called the Kelly Bensimon Metaphor Reel. Check it out here.

Article Posted 6 years Ago
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