You Don't Say! Mark McGwire Admits to Using Steroids!


mark-mcgwire-admits-steroidsIn what has to be the least surprising news of the day, Mark McGwire has finally admitted to using steroids and human growth hormone. In other sports news, I just found out that wrestling is staged!

After more than a decade of denials, McGwire admitted Monday that he might have had a little help hitting all those home runs. “The toughest thing is my wife, my parents, close friends have had no idea that I hid it from them all this time,” McGwire told The Associated Press in an emotional, 20-minute interview. “I knew this day was going to come. I didn’t know when.”

With his voice shaking, McGwire, who is the newly-hired hitting coach for the Cardinals, talked about having to break the news to his son Matt, who is now 22. When McGwire broke Roger Maris’ home run record in 1998 he hoisted Matt — then a 10-year-old batboy — at home plate. “He’s very, very understandable,” McGwire said of his son. “So are my parents. The biggest thing that they said is they’re very proud of me, that I’m doing this. They all believe it’s for the better. And then I just hope we can move on from this and start my new career as a coach.”