Dating Games
My husband, kids and I search for the perfect playdate.
by Emily Mendell
February 11, 2008
But things went very well. We really enjoyed Geoff's wife, Isolde. The kids hit it off. Our two older children are seven going on sixty-five, and the younger ones are both destined for nose piercings and purple hair. It felt like good karma, so we progressed to the next level: the at-home play date. The dads barbequed in the rain. Isolde and I chatted in the kitchen about work and our kids, who remarkably engaged in their own form of bonding in the playroom, entirely unassisted.
"Do you think they like us?" I giddily asked Dave while I cleaned up the dessert plates.
They did like us. After that, we found ourselves hitting the movies and the playgrounds. Soon we celebrated New Year's Eve together, embarked on a day trip to Dutch Wonderland, and then eventually spent the night together. Oh yes — it had to happen. Nothing says "I love you" more than blowing up the air mattresses and seeing everyone in their jammies first thing in the morning. This was intimacy at its best.
Like all relationships, ours isn't perfect. But we have such a crush on each other, our foibles are just endearing. We overlook that fact that the Aguirres run late more often than not. When Isolde brought her cappuccino machine camping in the woods, we thought it was cute. They won't let me forget my stupid fall at the homecoming football game, which required a trip to the emergency room.
When you find the right family to spend time with, your own family dynamics change dramatically.
The Aguirres are also extremely tolerant of our medical questions which have bordered on the preposterous. And we all have our moments of crankiness, both kids and grown-ups. But we always make up and feel closer than ever.
When you find the right family to spend time with, your own family dynamics change dramatically. I call it buffering. Inserting other people removes the everyday friction, if only for the evening. Our boys get along better with each other when the Aguirre girls are around. We parents are more tolerant of our children's borderline behavior because we can roll our eyes at someone else besides our spouse. And when we're laughing about our commonalities as parents and husbands and wives, we tend to give one another more of a break.
These days, we see the Aguirres a few times each month. We go on vacations together. Dave and Geoff just ran their first marathon. My boys refer to the girls as their cousins. And as the ultimate sign of love, we yell at each other's kids. When other commitments keep us away from one another, we actually miss them as a unit. I guess you can say we're going steady. And I, for one, am glad to be off the market.
Article photograph courtesy Lisa Schaffer
©2008 Emily Mendell and Nerve Media
About the Author
|
|
Related Articles
|
|
Emily Mendell
Emily Mendell writes and works from home in the Philadelphia suburbs where she lives with her husband and two sons. She is a regular contributor to Babble.com, iParenting.com and her essays have appeared in the Philadelphia Inquirer and Chicken Soup for the Soul: A Tribute to Moms 2008. She co-authors the daily blog mothersofbrothers.com. |
|
|
-
by Steven Johnson
The suburbs are overrated.
-
by Susan Gregory Thomas
Marketers say we're trying to relive our '70s childhood — and spending a fortune in the process.
-
by Steve Almond
The joy and pain of being a work-at-home parent.
|
