I’m not sure if any of you other baby daddies are going through this,
but I’m in this zone with Josie where we’re just stone-cold crazy about
each other. It hasn’t always been like this. We’ve had our rough
patches.
But these days, every time I walk into the room and see
her, she gives me one of those heart-crushing smiles and starts pumping
her little feet and reaches out for me and I have no choice but to drop
to my knees and make those weird, slobbering noises and start kissing
her all over her face, while she giggles madly.
It’s weird. I
find myself checking my hair in the mirror before I see Josie, making
sure my man musk isn’t too heavy. And I’d like to think that Josie also
takes a little special interest in her appearance. (She doesn’t.)
My wife — my patient, patient wife — has taken to calling Josie “your
new girlfriend.” As in, “Your new girlfriend has a whole mess of neck
boogers!” Or: “Did your new girlfriend poop her pants again? Why don’t
you check, Romeo?” Fortunately, I’ve had a lot of experience fielding
these sorts of questions, thanks to past relationships.
The truth is, this is
exactly why I wanted a girl. My apologies to those of you who think
Freud was full of caca, but the bottom line for us babydaddies is that
we can either have a child who (subconsciously) will eventually want to
kill us and screw our wives, or a child who will (subconsciously)
eventually want to kill our wives and screw us. Not really much of a
choice, from where I’m sitting.
I’m sorry, obviously, if this post strikes anyone as creepy. The truth can be creepy like that.
Some more creep: both Erin and I have been known to kiss Josie on
her cute little mouth. We both love taking baths with her, and we both
do an inordinate amount of pinching and kissing of her fat little body,
in particular her thighs, which now have these wonderful, curvy little
tiers of fat. It’s not a sexual thing (duh) but it’s certainly a deeply
physical thing.
So: are there other babydaddies out there who can report these behaviors and feelings? Or babymamas who can report the same phenom, in gender reverse??
Please, tell me I’m not the only one who has to fight the physical urge
to bite my daughter’s cute little tushie in the bath.
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Your posts always make me laugh! And I can relate. I’m a mama of a baby girl (7 months). Truth is though, I can’t stop kissing almost every inch of her. I cover her face with slobbery wet ones; nibble on her fingers. toes, and ears; and pinch and poke every roll on her chubby little self.
Have you ever noticed how many people pretend to eat babies’ toes? No doubt it’s a more socially acceptable body part that satisfies that need to gobble them up. I don’t think we’re alone in having this little fetish.
I’ll have to ask my husband what he thinks, but not long ago, when he was carrying our daughter in a front-carrier and holding her legs, he said, “Oh, my. I could rub these little legs all day long.” Seems like he’s got the problem, too.
I was just thinking this morning that a day may come when she fusses at me for kissing her. So I say, kiss and nibble while you still can!
My husband is constantly telling my 4-year old son and I to “Get a room, you two!” Like you, I’m enjoying it while I can!
I could kiss and cuddle up with my 4 year old boy all day long and be happy.
When I wake up in the morning he is curled up next to me and it is the most pleasent time of the day. Pure love and sweetness.
The toes are the best part to nibble on…my son still likes me to the ‘this little piggy” routine and if i dont nibble his toes at the end he tells me i “forgot to eat the pigs”
My wife and I both kiss our daughter on the lips and we both take showers with her… (I hate baths so she is on her own with that no matter how much I love her!)
I completely understand your feelings. When ever I see my little girl I want to hug and kiss and tickle her. Everything about her is cute and precious from her cute little butt (when it isn’t covered in the fresh poo offered up the diaper gods) to her soft little slightly pudgy cheeks often lightly crusted with what ever food she wouldn’t let us completely clean off after she finished her last meal.
My husband forbade me early on in our relationship from biting his ears. My baby boy (seven months) now pays the price.
I read your post this morning and have been thinking about it all day. Then around noon my son was acting a little fussy so we laid down in bed to read some books and nuzzle. I gave a huge wet kiss on the cheek, he laughed hysterically and rolled over and fell asleep instantly. what the?!
You are so totally not alone, it was all I could do when they were infants to not consume them. Their cheeks were bite-able, chubby little legs, piggies, all of it. Now of course being the big kids they are, I am so totally not allowed to get them. Boo. I still milk it with Michael, but his tolerance is wearing thin.
Oh, totally. Both A. and I are constantly overcome by (and submit to) the urge to kiss our girls all over their faces and mouths, to squeeze their thighs. I love carrying them naked to the tub, their little butts in my hand. It’s not sexual at all, as you say, just a purely primal, physicalthing.
You can’t help but pinch the fat tiers on the thighs, or squeeze a little round butt. Babies are MEANT to be squeezed. Mouth kissing, as long as it’s mouth closed (because milk breath is just gross, besides the weirdness of baby tongue kissing), is a-okay, too.
Guilty here too – I have stopped wearing lip balm because I kiss my son so often. I take a bath with him every night and I do kiss his squishy bum as my husband takes him out to dry him off. I am frequently caught with his toes in my mouth. Kissing on the lips is ok too.
Re: the Freudian stuff – I wonder what gay and lesbian parents would say to this?
There’s a great comment by Amy Krouse Rosenthal that pretty much sums it up:
“It’s a good job I can’t, because if I could, I would put my child’s entire soft body in my mouth.”
We kiss our baby on the mouth too (sometimes while in the bath…oooh scandalous) and she returns the favor by opening her mouth as wide as she can so we can get the maximum amount of slobber.
My husband is the same with our daughter. she is only 5 months so she is still in mommy-mode, but she definitely is in love with her daddy…as long as she’s not hungry, tired, or in need of changing.
Aw I know exactly what you mean.
Baby girls are the best.
When mine was tiny, I used to put her entire foot in my mouth and suck on it. ^.^ Hard to believe she was ever that tiny.
Hi Steve,
I’m writing from Open Source, a public radio show you know well.
Two years ago, we started what’s become a yearly tradition for us called Blogsday, http://www.radioopensource.org/blogsday-2007/ . Based loosely on Bloomsday, which celebrates “Ulysses” as an evocation of the world in a single day (in Joyce’s case, June 16, 1904), the idea is to create a mosaic portrait of the blogosphere by reading excerpts of blog posts written all over the world on the same day, for one night, for one hour, on live radio. This year, we chose this past Tuesday, June 5, to collect posts from, and the show will air Thursday night from 7-8pm EST.
I’m writing because we loved your post on the 5th, and it’s on the shortlist to be included among our Blogsday Best of the June 5th Blogosphere collection. Congratulations!
On Thursday night, we’ll bring in two accomplished and agile actors to read excerpts from our collection of posts on the air. I can’t guarantee that your post will make it onto the show at this point (we’re still knee-deep in our favorite posts), but you’re a finalist.
We can’t pay anything — this is public radio after all — but we can guarantee a respectful treatment, a national radio audience, and a link on our blog.
Let me know if you have any questions. I’ll try to send another email if I can confirm that your post will definitely be on the show beforehand, but if things get too crazy I may just let you know after the fact.
Many thanks,
Greta
i used to have thoughts or dreams of cute little babys and feeling sexual like kissing them and have them lick my pussy and when they suck on your arm wth sliva its perverted but ???????
i have a 5 month old girl and i use to have dreams too of her licking my pussy she does. i have baths with her and i kiss her all over and lick her i love her i am a lesbian she is so scrummmmmmy i could eat her up…..