My children are kleptomaniacs
Well, not exacly kleptomaniacs, I guess. But they do, all of a sudden, seem to have taken on a distinctly “what’s yours is mine” (and NOT the reverse) attitude when it comes to household objects and supplies.
Before I pillory them for crimes, however, I should confess that I was also prone to taking my parents’ stuff without asking when I was a kid, for use in various recipes / craft projects / experiments / etc. Once, for example, a friend and I picked my parents’ vegetable garden clean to make “soup,” in the form of a giant pot of water, filled from the hose out back, filled up with tomatoes, carrots, beans and other produce, and heated up on the stove. (Since we moved away from the house with the garden when I was a mere nine years old, this means that I was attempting unsupervised cooking at a fairly tender age.) And yes, the soup was terrible. (We couldn’t understand why….) And yes, my mom was pissed.
The girls have not committed quite so grievous an offense yet. But Elsa, in particular, is getting awfully bold about swiping the Scotch tape for her various projects — the rage of the moment is taping several pieces of paper together to make “maps” and “books” — as well as pens, post-it notes, and other supplies. We are, of course, happy to provide these things, in limited quanitities, if they ask. It’s the “limited” part that they’re not fans of. I’m thinking we should give them each with their own roll of tape, post-it note pad, etc. and let them use those, with the stipulation that they won’t get a new one for X weeks. And when they run out, well, that’s it. (They would run out in approximately 1.4 days.)
They’re also starting to help themselves to food. (You know, I’m writing ‘they’ but really, three out of four times, it’s Elsa.) I’ll be getting dinner ready, chopping vegetables or grating cheese or something, and if I turn away for a minute to do something else, I’ll turn back around to find a little hand reaching up to take a taste of whatever’s on the cutting board. Not a huge deal, usually. And sometimes they get what they deserve, ending up with a mouthful of onion or the unpleasant surprise of potato when they were expecting apple. The time Elsa ate garlic was fun, too. (Is it wrong that I take pleasure in my children’s food-tasting capers? But, really, the faces kids make when they end up with something ‘yucky’ in their mouths are truly priceless.)
And then there was the afternoon I came home from work to find the girls’ fingernails and toenails painted a very…maturely…dark hue. It seems the girls showed the babysitter where my nail polish was and requested manicures and pedicures. Really, though, the sitter is equally to blame here. Going through my makeup on the advice and direction of two three year olds? And then choosing Luscious Burgundy (or whatever….) for their nails, when something more along the lines of Cotton Candy Pink was available? And putting on TWO coats? For shame.
Anyway, we’re starting to be more emphatic about what the girls can and can’t help themselves to; what things they need to ask for, and what things they can take or do all by themselves. Still, I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before they borrow my $1,000 white suede ensemble while I’m out of town, wear it to a party, spill red wine all over it, then have to date Dr. McDreamy to pay me back. I just hope their careers are more successful than Amanda Peterson’s.
Sorry, where was I?
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Oh man, the Scotch tape! I would always steal it out of my Dad’s desk which I KNEW was off-limits, and I always had the intention of putting it back…but I never did. To this day, all Ellertsen girls get a roll of tape in their x-mas stocking.
Julia was always partial to double-sided tape, which of course is more expensive.
can’t steal me love
Wow, the Scotch tape. We go through about one roll per boy per week here, although it goes in waves. It’s supposed to be kept in the junk drawer in the kitchen, but they never put it back. I buy them the cheap no-name brand in bulk, and keep my good Scotch tape hidden with the gift-wrap supplies. And when they run out, they run out.
Thank God no nail polish here!
“Can’t buy me love” Watched that movie when I was young and rewatched it awhile back to see McDreamy when he was a kid. Way better looking with age for that one. Still cute when he was young though.
Mine don’t really steal my stuff. I make it where they can’t get my stuff in the first place. Harrison used to steal stuff from stores and other people’s houses though when he was much younger. He was barely walking and would hide toys from church nursery or a friend’s house in my stroller basket or diaper bag when I was not looking and I would find them later. Very clever. Stealing at a much higher level than he was. Aww my little international jewel theif. Once I explained to him it was wrong he stopped. I caught him doing it again awhile back and had to have the talk again and he has not done it again.
My mom babysat a little girl who one day at her grandmother’s house was told she could have one candy from the candy dish on the coffee table. They took her home and the grandmother called the mother and asked “Why is all my candy gone?” The mother went to investigate and found Alex’s underwear discarded in the corner of her room filled up with candy. She stowed it away in her undies! She was maybe 3 or 4. She stole a toy that way from another kid too.
Omg I wanted that white suede outfit and the white cabriolet. I think I was in sixth grade and I thought that WAS high school. But funny thing is that I now have two children (girls) and the last thing you would find in my closet would be a white two piece suede outfit WITH FRINGE. So I don’t suspect they’ll steal that. But then they are still babies, so right now it’s all about stealing daddy’s hats and mommy’s bras. That might mean something…
My bff and I used to play Chemist in my closet. We’d swipe perfume from our sisters + mothers. We’d mix potent concoctions in hope of an eruption, explosion, or at least a fizzle. Since she was the youngest of 7, and me of 5, we had a LOT of choice ingredients: Love’s Baby Soft, Jean a te, Channel #5, Charlie. Eventually we added Alka Seltzer to get the desired bubbling effect for mad scientist brew.
We we’re Chemists for a few weeks … the closet smelled for YEARS!
Harper’s actually become much more responsible about stuff like this. A year ago, she was all about unlimited tape and post-its. And a few months before that, she would just take stuff–lotion was a huge hit–from me, from Grandma, from friends. At 18 months, Calvin’s newest obsession is pens, and he seems to have amazing pen-dar, even if they’re on high shelves or in drawers.
Can’t buy me love! Damn I must have watched that movie 100 times when I was 13.